Existential crisis in downtown Bethesda

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be frank, Bethesda is TERRIBLE for this. MoCo in general is pretty bad. I can't even count how many entitled boomers (sorry, but it really is this age range) I saw during my time living in Bethesda and Chevy Chase. They just LOVE to chew out minimum wage workers. I saw old people chew out the ticket seller in front of Bethedsa Row Cinema 3-4 times in a one year period over stupid stuff. One guy was infuriated that he had to select seats. For whatever reason I do not observe this in NoVa - perhaps merely because the average age is 5 years younger and there are fewer of those people *yet*

The common denominator is they're from Maryland. Marylanders are assh*oles. They're the worst drivers in the DMV. Prickliest retail customers. Most insufferable parents. Avoid at all costs.

Funny to read this, since I hate all things Virginia (and won’t drive there for most things).

[Anonymous]

I feel like I live in a different Bethesda than others are describing. My DC went to public school. Mostly 2 working parents. Most of the moms have little time for shopping or iced coffee drinking. Most of my friends are very well educated and not superficial.

I grew up in Bethesda, back when it was just a plain old suburb. It’s not all that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of my friends and family members not from here (and across all incomes) observe the same thing about lack of independent shops and dining. They feel this area is devoid of character and is entirely charmless. I’m sharing this only to say that you are not the only person who feels this way. Perhaps Bethesda and the greater DC area is not the right spot for you.

OP:That's just it! It feels like a synthetic, Epcot Center generic version of an UMC neighborhood. Even Great Neck Long Island has more authenticity and local character. I do like the residential parts though, some of them. But it has been so humid and, well, swampy and mosquito-y here. I am really questioning its appeal.


Here is what I value: Education & at least some similarly educated and accomplished people; beautiful high quality housing; leafy neighborhoods where people and kids know each other; natural beauty, the outdoors, outdoor recreation like hiking, biking, skiing, swimming, sailing, horseback riding; the arts; high quality food which can mean restaurants but also farmer's markets with real farmers that are not more expensive than Whole Foods. Education has value. Making things has value. Making and listening to music have value. Entertaining indoors and outdoors with people I love and like talking to about things that matter (not just the latest status symbol who who stayed in what hotel on which vacation) have value. I am lucky in that my work is already lucrative and meaningful, and is portable. I do not care what type of car I or others drive or how big your engagement ring is/was and I have never attended a Spin class.

Where should I live?

CCDC. Seriously. This is exactly what it is like - very intelligent people, down to earth, care about the things you mention above. People have actual depth. But the downside is that it can be kind of nerdy, but then you can just hop across Western Ave into CCDC or further up into Bethesda for the day to get your fix of the beautiful people who all seem to be real estate agents and have trust funds, then pop back to DC and nerd your heart out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The biggest issue with Bethesda is that it has no personality.
Neighborhoods like Tenleytown or Georgetown have personality.
You may not like what Tenleytown has to offer because some of it is crappy but you can’t argue that it has more soul than Bethesda.

Ugh. Teneleytown is just hot sparkling cement in the summer, with a bunch of cheap chain restaurants and stores too close to the sidewalk. It has soul?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The biggest issue with Bethesda is that it has no personality.
Neighborhoods like Tenleytown or Georgetown have personality.
You may not like what Tenleytown has to offer because some of it is crappy but you can’t argue that it has more soul than Bethesda.

Lol Tenley has soul? Sure, Jan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of my friends and family members not from here (and across all incomes) observe the same thing about lack of independent shops and dining. They feel this area is devoid of character and is entirely charmless. I’m sharing this only to say that you are not the only person who feels this way. Perhaps Bethesda and the greater DC area is not the right spot for you.

OP:That's just it! It feels like a synthetic, Epcot Center generic version of an UMC neighborhood. Even Great Neck Long Island has more authenticity and local character. I do like the residential parts though, some of them. But it has been so humid and, well, swampy and mosquito-y here. I am really questioning its appeal.


Here is what I value: Education & at least some similarly educated and accomplished people; beautiful high quality housing; leafy neighborhoods where people and kids know each other; natural beauty, the outdoors, outdoor recreation like hiking, biking, skiing, swimming, sailing, horseback riding; the arts; high quality food which can mean restaurants but also farmer's markets with real farmers that are not more expensive than Whole Foods. Education has value. Making things has value. Making and listening to music have value. Entertaining indoors and outdoors with people I love and like talking to about things that matter (not just the latest status symbol who who stayed in what hotel on which vacation) have value. I am lucky in that my work is already lucrative and meaningful, and is portable. I do not care what type of car I or others drive or how big your engagement ring is/was and I have never attended a Spin class.

Where should I live?

There are some great suburbs of Chicago that DH and I have found to have the appeal you describe (but even better than Bethesda or CC) with slightly less of the stepford-ey vibes you describe. The midwestern mentality keeps it feeling more authentic and down to earth even in the extremely affluent parts. We love it here and and don’t miss the swampy humidity and mosquitoes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's the main reason I don't live there and instead live in a more affordable part of MoCo.

Me too. Why I don't live in Takoma Park but instead live in DC near the border of PG. Too many white entitled a holes over there with not enough real stuff to worry about who turn their anger towards all around them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's the main reason I don't live there and instead live in a more affordable part of MoCo.

Me too. Why I don't live in Takoma Park but instead live in DC near the border of PG. Too many white entitled a holes over there with not enough real stuff to worry about who turn their anger towards all around them.

Why is Takoma Park thrown in here ?

[Anonymous]

What about Brookland?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's the main reason I don't live there and instead live in a more affordable part of MoCo.

Me too. Why I don't live in Takoma Park but instead live in DC near the border of PG. Too many white entitled a holes over there with not enough real stuff to worry about who turn their anger towards all around them.

Why is Takoma Park thrown in here ?

Because it is a blight on Montgomery County governance.

[Anonymous]

The Bethesda hate on this board is intense. I live here and I live downtown Bethesda. I live further up so can bike or bus to downtown Bethesda. So I’m not quite walkable. I am walkable to Wildwood shopping center. It’s a great place to live and I don’t find people unfriendly if you know them. But DC I’m general is less friendly than the outskirts of Maryland and Virginia.

I don’t agree that there isn’t personality in Bethesda- you’ve just got to get outside of Bethesda row. That being said it’s a small suburb! Give it a rest, OP.

[Anonymous]

OP - I have a book recommendation

Small Is Beautiful by EF Schumacher

As a kid, I was seduced by this book only to realize that reality is different. Same applies to Ayn Rand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, people are heartless and rude -- you can see that all over DCUM. They're dead inside.

Actually what the cranky woman was saying is true. I stand by the post above, but she was right -- we are constantly being ripped off by businesses.

Along those lines, this article from last week's Times really resonated for me and apparently a lot of people.

https://www.nytimes.com/2022/07/07/opinion/work-busy-trap-millennials.html

"To young people, America seems less like a country than an inescapable web of scams, and “hard work” less like a virtue than a propaganda slogan, inane as “Just say no.”

Every sector is set up to extract as much money and hard work as possible from Americans, Congress is in on the scams, welcome to late-stage capitalism. The planet is not surviving it.

[Anonymous]

I hear you, OP. I've owned a home in Bethesda for more than 10 years and can't stand the drivers, those people or those stores. However, I'm here for the wonderful public schools (our kids are in the Whitman cluster), the beautiful tree lined streets, our non-McMansion colonial, the convenience of being able to walk to downtown Bethesda, the joy of biking the Capitol Crescent Trail, and living inside the Beltway. I love being able to drive to Pennsylvania ski slopes in 90 minutes, the Delaware beaches in 2-3 hours, and every major airport in under an hour. I love Gringos and Mariachis. I love Pesca Deli. I love Landmark Cinemas. I love the Bethesda Central Farmers Market. Do I wish there was more authenticity? Absolutely. I'd love a good, local craft brewery. I'm looking forward to Salt Line coming to Bethesda. I don't buy $5+ coffee - I grind mine at home from Major Dickasons from Costco. I realize I live in a bubble and am surrounded by plenty of unhappy middle aged SAHMs with their Soul(less) Cycle and Pure Barre classes. I avoid those and those social climbing types like the plague. However, there are plenty of good, down to earth, educated families in Bethesda - you just need to find your people and avoid/ignore the rest. I also don't think this issue is unique to Bethesda.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of my friends and family members not from here (and across all incomes) observe the same thing about lack of independent shops and dining. They feel this area is devoid of character and is entirely charmless. I’m sharing this only to say that you are not the only person who feels this way. Perhaps Bethesda and the greater DC area is not the right spot for you.

OP:That's just it! It feels like a synthetic, Epcot Center generic version of an UMC neighborhood. Even Great Neck Long Island has more authenticity and local character. I do like the residential parts though, some of them. But it has been so humid and, well, swampy and mosquito-y here. I am really questioning its appeal.


Here is what I value: Education & at least some similarly educated and accomplished people; beautiful high quality housing; leafy neighborhoods where people and kids know each other; natural beauty, the outdoors, outdoor recreation like hiking, biking, skiing, swimming, sailing, horseback riding; the arts; high quality food which can mean restaurants but also farmer's markets with real farmers that are not more expensive than Whole Foods. Education has value. Making things has value. Making and listening to music have value. Entertaining indoors and outdoors with people I love and like talking to about things that matter (not just the latest status symbol who who stayed in what hotel on which vacation) have value. I am lucky in that my work is already lucrative and meaningful, and is portable. I do not care what type of car I or others drive or how big your engagement ring is/was and I have never attended a Spin class.

Where should I live?

There are some great suburbs of Chicago that DH and I have found to have the appeal you describe (but even better than Bethesda or CC) with slightly less of the stepford-ey vibes you describe. The midwestern mentality keeps it feeling more authentic and down to earth even in the extremely affluent parts. We love it here and and don’t miss the swampy humidity and mosquitoes.

Which ones in Chicago area?