Ships and Stans

[Anonymous]

Just for the record - I don't have teens!

I saw a link to an Adele carpool karaoke video recently - the number of views was shocking so I ended up looking up the other most watched videos and watched one by a boy band - one direction. That led me down a rabbit hole of the internet and some of it was well... a whole new world!

They use the word ships to mean love and the word stan to mean stalker fan. The degree and intensity of obsession of some of these teens girls with the boys in the band seemed really unhealthy. They wait for hours / days to see them. They try to hunt them down by the smallest clue. They scream and faint when they see them. They shell out thousands of $$$ for concert tickets, a picture, a meet and greet, and merchandise. They are infatuated and obsessed. Lots of comments about their bodies and their looks.

However the rabbit hole got weirder. They write erotic fiction stories about the boys in the band and do all kinds of weird and strange things with these stories. They have decided that two of the boys in the band are secretly gay and in love and have convinced themselves this is true to the point that their actions have actually disrupted the relationships in the band and the boys lives.

I feel like if it was teen boys acting like this over girls, everyone would immediately think it was wrong, creepy, stalkerish and very unhealthy. There doesn't seem to be much concern when it is teen girls. How do you feel about your daughters viewing guys in this way or acting this way towards guys?

It came across as really uncomfortable and unhealthy to me.

[Anonymous]

Teen obsession with singers is nothing new. It’s all just online now instead of in diaries or journals.

[Anonymous]

Rainbow Rowell wrote a cute smart book about someone who writes Harry Potterish fanfic called Fangirl (she also later revealed she has written her own).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Rainbow Rowell wrote a cute smart book about someone who writes Harry Potterish fanfic called Fangirl (she also later revealed she has written her own).

My DD loved Carry On!

[Anonymous]

I felt this way about Bon Jovi. But it was before the internet, and I guess I wasn't super motivated to track him down and wait for hours... Parents wouldn't do that for kids orpermit it back then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teen obsession with singers is nothing new. It’s all just online now instead of in diaries or journals.

+1.
Give tween/teen Beatles fans the internet back in the 60s and it would have been the same result

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I felt this way about Bon Jovi. But it was before the internet, and I guess I wasn't super motivated to track him down and wait for hours... Parents wouldn't do that for kids orpermit it back then.

There is an episode of the Mortified Guide where Bon Jovi was journaled about with fan fic intensity:
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7343520/

[Anonymous]

I think the internet has intensified it a lot. It went from diaries and journals to tracking people down and following their every move. The online world is scary.

A bit crazy when teen boys need teams of security to keep them safe from teen girls who are obsessed with them.

[Anonymous]

This is not new. Ever heard of The Beatles?

And a bit odd to reference 1D and explain who they were, given they broke up a few years ago.

[Anonymous]

Have you not seen Almost Famous?

[Anonymous]

The internet has made it a lot worse, IMO. Back in the day, it was not easy for these people to connect. Now they all meet in online communities and feed off each other and decide that because other people do it, it must be normal. I think female celebrities are probably subjected to more vulgar, aggressive stalking behavior, but men attract freaks too. As long as you are confining yourself to fanfiction, I guess it's not harming the person you're obsessed with, but nor is it healthy to spend all your time wishing Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman were gay and being upset that they aren't. Or writing to the BBC about it. Or photoshopping pictures of Jensen Ackles. It's borderline delusional behavior and causes you to lose connection with reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I felt this way about Bon Jovi. But it was before the internet, and I guess I wasn't super motivated to track him down and wait for hours... Parents wouldn't do that for kids orpermit it back then.

I have met him twice - once on his own, once with his wife. They're both lovely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is not new. Ever heard of The Beatles?

And a bit odd to reference 1D and explain who they were, given they broke up a few years ago.

THEY'RE ON A BREAK!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I felt this way about Bon Jovi. But it was before the internet, and I guess I wasn't super motivated to track him down and wait for hours... Parents wouldn't do that for kids orpermit it back then.

Given the historical fandom for The Beatles and Elvis and Nirvana I’m honestly wondering if this is a DCUM parody thread

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the internet has intensified it a lot. It went from diaries and journals to tracking people down and following their every move. The online world is scary.

A bit crazy when teen boys need teams of security to keep them safe from teen girls who are obsessed with them.

Crazy stalkers existed before the internet:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rebecca_Schaeffer