PSA - when you greet my son-

[Anonymous]

Or any other adolescent whose physical appearance falls outside the “norm”

Yes my son is tall. He is 4 inches taller than the average man. He is quite aware that he is tall. He is just 14 yrs old. It’s an age that comes with a lot of self consciousness- even awkwardness. Don’t you think It would be so much more polite to say “wow you look great!” (He does) or “nice shirt” or “I haven’t seen you in a while- you look great! Rather than OHMYGODYOU ARE SOOOOOOO TALL!!!!!

He knows he is tall. He has heard it his entire life. Make a tiny effort, please! Do you think you are the only person to notice that he is tall? That’s the way you sound! Would you comment on any other physical feature? Probably not! So why is this one ok? Believe me- you are not helping anything or anyone with that comment!!

Signed, his mom, and a woman who went through the SAME THING!

[Anonymous]

Uh my son loves to be recognized for his height. Can't you make this a positive, not a negative?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Uh my son loves to be recognized for his height. Can't you make this a positive, not a negative?

My son is the same. He thinks it is an awesome compliment when someone comments on how tall he is.

OP, are you embarrassed about his height and passing it on to him?

Most teen boys are proud of being tall.

[Anonymous]

Oh please. Tall men have way more advantages than short ones. Cry me a river.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Or any other adolescent whose physical appearance falls outside the “norm”

Yes my son is tall. He is 4 inches taller than the average man. He is quite aware that he is tall. He is just 14 yrs old. It’s an age that comes with a lot of self consciousness- even awkwardness. Don’t you think It would be so much more polite to say “wow you look great!” (He does) or “nice shirt” or “I haven’t seen you in a while- you look great! Rather than OHMYGODYOU ARE SOOOOOOO TALL!!!!!

He knows he is tall. He has heard it his entire life. Make a tiny effort, please! Do you think you are the only person to notice that he is tall? That’s the way you sound! Would you comment on any other physical feature? Probably not! So why is this one ok? Believe me- you are not helping anything or anyone with that comment!!

Signed, his mom, and a woman who went through the SAME THING!

Commenting on a teen boy being taller than normal is completely different than commenting on a teen girl being tall.

A better comparison would be someone commenting on a boy being so short.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh please. Tall men have way more advantages than short ones. Cry me a river.

I think this is more about mom being tall than the boy being tall.

[Anonymous]

Are you my MIL? Always complaining about how she was the tall plain one in her family.

DH is tall and everyone comments on it (he is 6'3" or 6'4") and he never had any issues with it. It has helped him in his career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you my MIL? Always complaining about how she was the tall plain one in her family.

DH is tall and everyone comments on it (he is 6'3" or 6'4") and he never had any issues with it. It has helped him in his career.

PP here again. And our son is tall, people have said he was lanky and long since he was a newborn. Not a problem there either.

[Anonymous]

My SO had grown to his adult height of 6'6" by the time he was 18, but he was 6'4" by 16.

When he was a teenager, he began introducing himself and then saying, "Before you ask, I am 6'4"" (or 6'5" or 6'6" depending on the year). Apparently that stopped the comments. He certainly doesn't do that anymore, but it seems that there are a lot more men who are 6'3" or taller than there used to be, so most people don't comment on his height.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Uh my son loves to be recognized for his height. Can't you make this a positive, not a negative?

My son is the same. He thinks it is an awesome compliment when someone comments on how tall he is.

OP, are you embarrassed about his height and passing it on to him?

Most teen boys are proud of being tall.

+1. My DS hit his growth spurt early, and was almost six feet at 14. Now 16 and just hitting 6’1’’. He’s probably almost done— his pediatrician thinks an inch or two more at most. He got a lot of “you are so tall”. Is it boring and predictable? Yes. Is it offensive or upsetting? I don’t see it. He grew up knowing he was going to be tall, because of his height at age 2. We made a point of him understanding that height is an asset for a man. Pointing the body language out on TV, looking at heights for CEOs, etc. of helping him realize that for a boy, being tall is easier than being short. That it was nice to be one of the few boys who was not shorter than all the girls. Of making sure he had blue jeans that fit properly, even the winter he went through three sizes in one winter.

I thought this was going to be about adults make hurtful or inappropriate remarks to a bald kid undergoing chemo, or a kid with Tourette’s or Down’s syndrome, or an intellectual disability.

OP, if your kid has a huge issue with being tall, it’s because you have made it an issue. And yes— it can be though to be an unusually tall girl. DS has a friend who is a girl in his grade who has always been taller than him, and the mean girls were awful. But as unfair as it is, society views tall men and tall women differently.

TL;DR: get a handle on your own issues about being tall and don’t hand them down to your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Uh my son loves to be recognized for his height. Can't you make this a positive, not a negative?

My son is the same. He thinks it is an awesome compliment when someone comments on how tall he is.

OP, are you embarrassed about his height and passing it on to him?

Most teen boys are proud of being tall.

+1. My DS hit his growth spurt early, and was almost six feet at 14. Now 16 and just hitting 6’1’’. He’s probably almost done— his pediatrician thinks an inch or two more at most. He got a lot of “you are so tall”. Is it boring and predictable? Yes. Is it offensive or upsetting? I don’t see it. He grew up knowing he was going to be tall, because of his height at age 2. We made a point of him understanding that height is an asset for a man. Pointing the body language out on TV, looking at heights for CEOs, etc. of helping him realize that for a boy, being tall is easier than being short. That it was nice to be one of the few boys who was not shorter than all the girls. Of making sure he had blue jeans that fit properly, even the winter he went through three sizes in one winter.

I thought this was going to be about adults make hurtful or inappropriate remarks to a bald kid undergoing chemo, or a kid with Tourette’s or Down’s syndrome, or an intellectual disability.

OP, if your kid has a huge issue with being tall, it’s because you have made it an issue. And yes— it can be though to be an unusually tall girl. DS has a friend who is a girl in his grade who has always been taller than him, and the mean girls were awful. But as unfair as it is, society views tall men and tall women differently.

TL;DR: get a handle on your own issues about being tall and don’t hand them down to your kid.

Tough.. it can be tough to be a tall girl. Ugghh.

[Anonymous]

My daughter is really short and will always be much shorter than average. She gets the same thing. But you can’t change other people, only yourself, so we have taught her several funny comeback to use when people comment on her short stature. You can’t keep people from making comments to your son, but teach him how to handle it gracefully.

[Anonymous]

Omg. Of all the things to get your parties twisted about this is it OP?

You really have sunk to a new low.

Signed,
6 ft 1in mother who has 4 teens/tweens including an 11 year old girl who is 5 ft 9in (no period) and 3 brothers with the tallest being 6 ft 6in at 16– still growing.

[Anonymous]

How tall is he? You should have him tested for Marfan Syndrome.

[Anonymous]

Deal. If you won't mention my kids' red hair, I won't mention your kids' height