Would you lie about your LMP in my situation?

[Anonymous]

I've been tracking my cycles for 6+ years and know them very well, including when I ovulate. (Never used hormonal birth control.) My cycles are easy to follow but I don't always ovulate on the same day, and definitely don't always ovulate on Day 14, the magical day the medical world considers to be the norm. My babies like to gestate longer than 40 weeks, so I'm concerned about this pregnancy. Here's the deal:

Pregnancy #1: ovulated on Day 14, baby born at 41 weeks

Pregnancy #2: ovulated on Day 22. I told my practice this but they refused to budge on my due date (which they based off of LMP). I was concerned because my first baby was overdue. When I was already a week overdue with #2 I remembered I had a very early ultrasound done in another country because I was traveling in the developing world and wanted to make sure it wasn't ectopic, and they let me use that to change the due date--after they already made me schedule an induction due to being overdue by their date. Baby #2 ended up being born 17 days after my original due date and 9 days after the adjusted (correct) due date. It was a huge hassle and I was told many times I would have to be induced by 41,5 or so, when I knew I wasn't even 41 weeks yet. Very quick labor, easy delivery.

Pregnancy #3: miscarriage

Pregnancy #4 (current, I'm about 7 weeks pregnant): ovulated on Day 18-19. I'm envisioning the same scenario as #2, where I'm pressured to be induced before I should be.

I have yet to schedule an appointment for #4 but it will be a new practice (new city, #1 and #2 were also in different cities, we move a lot). Dating scans weren't offered at either practice and I don't know if they are offered at my new practice. (I had NT scans but they never adjusted my due date.)

If you were in my shoes would you fudge your LMP by 4-5 days? Insist on a dating scan if they don't offer one? Say I don't know my LMP and need a dating scan? I hate to lie but I know my body better than the doctors/textbooks do. This may not sound like a big deal but I'm really opposed to being forced to induce and don't want the added anxiety. Otherwise I am very chill about pregnancy and birth.

[Anonymous]

I ovulate late (cd 27ish) and both times I was pregnant I lied about my LMP for that exact reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been tracking my cycles for 6+ years and know them very well, including when I ovulate. (Never used hormonal birth control.) My cycles are easy to follow but I don't always ovulate on the same day, and definitely don't always ovulate on Day 14, the magical day the medical world considers to be the norm. My babies like to gestate longer than 40 weeks, so I'm concerned about this pregnancy. Here's the deal:

Pregnancy #1: ovulated on Day 14, baby born at 41 weeks

Pregnancy #2: ovulated on Day 22. I told my practice this but they refused to budge on my due date (which they based off of LMP). I was concerned because my first baby was overdue. When I was already a week overdue with #2 I remembered I had a very early ultrasound done in another country because I was traveling in the developing world and wanted to make sure it wasn't ectopic, and they let me use that to change the due date--after they already made me schedule an induction due to being overdue by their date. Baby #2 ended up being born 17 days after my original due date and 9 days after the adjusted (correct) due date. It was a huge hassle and I was told many times I would have to be induced by 41,5 or so, when I knew I wasn't even 41 weeks yet. Very quick labor, easy delivery.

Pregnancy #3: miscarriage

Pregnancy #4 (current, I'm about 7 weeks pregnant): ovulated on Day 18-19. I'm envisioning the same scenario as #2, where I'm pressured to be induced before I should be.

I have yet to schedule an appointment for #4 but it will be a new practice (new city, #1 and #2 were also in different cities, we move a lot). Dating scans weren't offered at either practice and I don't know if they are offered at my new practice. (I had NT scans but they never adjusted my due date.)

If you were in my shoes would you fudge your LMP by 4-5 days? Insist on a dating scan if they don't offer one? Say I don't know my LMP and need a dating scan? I hate to lie but I know my body better than the doctors/textbooks do. This may not sound like a big deal but I'm really opposed to being forced to induce and don't want the added anxiety. Otherwise I am very chill about pregnancy and birth.

Insist on a dating scan. Just tell them you don't know your LMP date because your periods are irregular. That will force them to do a dating scan even if they otherwise don't want to, because they will have no other way to do it.

[Anonymous]

Say you don’t know LMP. Insist on scan. Or give adjusted date as approximate.

I knew my dates exactly (IVF) and they still wouldn’t change LMP for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been tracking my cycles for 6+ years and know them very well, including when I ovulate. (Never used hormonal birth control.) My cycles are easy to follow but I don't always ovulate on the same day, and definitely don't always ovulate on Day 14, the magical day the medical world considers to be the norm. My babies like to gestate longer than 40 weeks, so I'm concerned about this pregnancy. Here's the deal:

Pregnancy #1: ovulated on Day 14, baby born at 41 weeks

Pregnancy #2: ovulated on Day 22. I told my practice this but they refused to budge on my due date (which they based off of LMP). I was concerned because my first baby was overdue. When I was already a week overdue with #2 I remembered I had a very early ultrasound done in another country because I was traveling in the developing world and wanted to make sure it wasn't ectopic, and they let me use that to change the due date--after they already made me schedule an induction due to being overdue by their date. Baby #2 ended up being born 17 days after my original due date and 9 days after the adjusted (correct) due date. It was a huge hassle and I was told many times I would have to be induced by 41,5 or so, when I knew I wasn't even 41 weeks yet. Very quick labor, easy delivery.

Pregnancy #3: miscarriage

Pregnancy #4 (current, I'm about 7 weeks pregnant): ovulated on Day 18-19. I'm envisioning the same scenario as #2, where I'm pressured to be induced before I should be.

I have yet to schedule an appointment for #4 but it will be a new practice (new city, #1 and #2 were also in different cities, we move a lot). Dating scans weren't offered at either practice and I don't know if they are offered at my new practice. (I had NT scans but they never adjusted my due date.)

If you were in my shoes would you fudge your LMP by 4-5 days? Insist on a dating scan if they don't offer one? Say I don't know my LMP and need a dating scan? I hate to lie but I know my body better than the doctors/textbooks do. This may not sound like a big deal but I'm really opposed to being forced to induce and don't want the added anxiety. Otherwise I am very chill about pregnancy and birth.

Insist on a dating scan. Just tell them you don't know your LMP date because your periods are irregular. That will force them to do a dating scan even if they otherwise don't want to, because they will have no other way to do it.

No. Then they will use he default 14.

Op - simply lie about the date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Say you don’t know LMP. Insist on scan. Or give adjusted date as approximate.

I knew my dates exactly (IVF) and they still wouldn’t change LMP for me.

OP here. Interesting. Do you mean they based your due date off your LMP?? I thought with IVF they based it off the transfer date (or some other very specific part of the process).

[Anonymous]

I would give lmp+5 days.

[Anonymous]

Don't lie. That's only 4 days off the standard LMP.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure if this is helpful, but I have 3 kids and a long-ish menstrual cycle of about 35 days and when they do the LMP calculations they use a 28 day cycle, which is always a week off for me.

With #1 and #2, I told them this, and what I said matched with the dating u/s so they used that info and it was all fine.
With #3 I told them this info and they did the dating u/s and the dating u/s was off by a week (saying a week less than using LMP, like I said). BUT this practice said they only change the due date if the dating u/s is MORE than a week different from the LMP calculation. I was kind of annoyed about this. Fast forward to the 20 week u/s, when the midwife gave me the results, she off hand commented that one measurement was within the range of normal but slightly on the small side for 20 weeks, and I said - well, I am not 20 weeks pregnant - I am 19 weeks pregnant, but they won't change my due date to match my info & the dating u/s because it was only week different than the LMP calculation! And she said, oh, well that measurement wouldn't be slightly on the small side for 19 weeks, so I'm changing the due date right now - and she did.

For what it's worth, these were all different ob/gyns - and they all offered a dating u/s - so I'm surprised to hear yours didn't. I suppose I thought that was standard these days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been tracking my cycles for 6+ years and know them very well, including when I ovulate. (Never used hormonal birth control.) My cycles are easy to follow but I don't always ovulate on the same day, and definitely don't always ovulate on Day 14, the magical day the medical world considers to be the norm. My babies like to gestate longer than 40 weeks, so I'm concerned about this pregnancy. Here's the deal:

Pregnancy #1: ovulated on Day 14, baby born at 41 weeks

Pregnancy #2: ovulated on Day 22. I told my practice this but they refused to budge on my due date (which they based off of LMP). I was concerned because my first baby was overdue. When I was already a week overdue with #2 I remembered I had a very early ultrasound done in another country because I was traveling in the developing world and wanted to make sure it wasn't ectopic, and they let me use that to change the due date--after they already made me schedule an induction due to being overdue by their date. Baby #2 ended up being born 17 days after my original due date and 9 days after the adjusted (correct) due date. It was a huge hassle and I was told many times I would have to be induced by 41,5 or so, when I knew I wasn't even 41 weeks yet. Very quick labor, easy delivery.

Pregnancy #3: miscarriage

Pregnancy #4 (current, I'm about 7 weeks pregnant): ovulated on Day 18-19. I'm envisioning the same scenario as #2, where I'm pressured to be induced before I should be.

I have yet to schedule an appointment for #4 but it will be a new practice (new city, #1 and #2 were also in different cities, we move a lot). Dating scans weren't offered at either practice and I don't know if they are offered at my new practice. (I had NT scans but they never adjusted my due date.)

If you were in my shoes would you fudge your LMP by 4-5 days? Insist on a dating scan if they don't offer one? Say I don't know my LMP and need a dating scan? I hate to lie but I know my body better than the doctors/textbooks do. This may not sound like a big deal but I'm really opposed to being forced to induce and don't want the added anxiety. Otherwise I am very chill about pregnancy and birth.

Insist on a dating scan. Just tell them you don't know your LMP date because your periods are irregular. That will force them to do a dating scan even if they otherwise don't want to, because they will have no other way to do it.

No. Then they will use he default 14.

Op - simply lie about the date.

Huh? I gave my exact LMP and they adjusted the due date based on the 7 week dating scan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure if this is helpful, but I have 3 kids and a long-ish menstrual cycle of about 35 days and when they do the LMP calculations they use a 28 day cycle, which is always a week off for me.

With #1 and #2, I told them this, and what I said matched with the dating u/s so they used that info and it was all fine.
With #3 I told them this info and they did the dating u/s and the dating u/s was off by a week (saying a week less than using LMP, like I said). BUT this practice said they only change the due date if the dating u/s is MORE than a week different from the LMP calculation. I was kind of annoyed about this. Fast forward to the 20 week u/s, when the midwife gave me the results, she off hand commented that one measurement was within the range of normal but slightly on the small side for 20 weeks, and I said - well, I am not 20 weeks pregnant - I am 19 weeks pregnant, but they won't change my due date to match my info & the dating u/s because it was only week different than the LMP calculation! And she said, oh, well that measurement wouldn't be slightly on the small side for 19 weeks, so I'm changing the due date right now - and she did.

For what it's worth, these were all different ob/gyns - and they all offered a dating u/s - so I'm surprised to hear yours didn't. I suppose I thought that was standard these days.

OP here. Thanks for these anecdotes! I was measuring a little off with #2 but they wouldn't change my due date. I go to large university practices where I see a different person every time (by choice) and I wonder if that would contribute to their not wanting to change what another doc/midwife did?

I see posts about people getting early ultrasounds and wonder why they're getting them. When do you schedule it? After your first visit? I will ask my new practice what their standard policy is, but they're going to ask me for my LMP when I call to schedule an appointment.

The person who said it's only 4-5 days, that can make a big difference! I was 9 days overdue with #2 (according to my real due date). 9 + 5 = 14. 40 weeks + 14 days = pressure to induce starting at (not real) 41 weeks.

If I remember, I'm totally going to come back here in February and post what happened.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Say you don’t know LMP. Insist on scan. Or give adjusted date as approximate.

I knew my dates exactly (IVF) and they still wouldn’t change LMP for me.

OP here. Interesting. Do you mean they based your due date off your LMP?? I thought with IVF they based it off the transfer date (or some other very specific part of the process).

Yes. I know exactly when my “ovulation” occurred and they wouldn’t adjust. The biggest issue for me was getting some of the testing completed within certain time windows.

I just lied for baby #2. Made it much easier.

[Anonymous]

I've never had your experience, and I've been pregnant in 4 different states. I've always had a viability ultrasound at 8 weeks and that's how they determine a due date. Why aren't they giving you the same ultrasound at or around 8 weeks for dating purposes? Is it because of your insurance? My cycles are like clockwork 30 days long, always ovulate on CD CD16. Still always received the 8 week ultrasound. I wouldn't lie.

[Anonymous]

I would seriously be looking for a new OB if they insisted on such a stupid thing as dating a baby based on LMP despite what the scans say. I've had 3 different OB/practices for my kids and nobody has done this.

Usually they take it as a guide (i.e. a guide for when to do scans etc) and adjust/correct during the first scan - around 7-9 weeks.

And yes, I would have no problems saying that I didn't know if I had to stay with a practice like that. When they ask, tell them your "best guess" (i.e. your lie) but insist on a dating scan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure if this is helpful, but I have 3 kids and a long-ish menstrual cycle of about 35 days and when they do the LMP calculations they use a 28 day cycle, which is always a week off for me.

With #1 and #2, I told them this, and what I said matched with the dating u/s so they used that info and it was all fine.
With #3 I told them this info and they did the dating u/s and the dating u/s was off by a week (saying a week less than using LMP, like I said). BUT this practice said they only change the due date if the dating u/s is MORE than a week different from the LMP calculation. I was kind of annoyed about this. Fast forward to the 20 week u/s, when the midwife gave me the results, she off hand commented that one measurement was within the range of normal but slightly on the small side for 20 weeks, and I said - well, I am not 20 weeks pregnant - I am 19 weeks pregnant, but they won't change my due date to match my info & the dating u/s because it was only week different than the LMP calculation! And she said, oh, well that measurement wouldn't be slightly on the small side for 19 weeks, so I'm changing the due date right now - and she did.

For what it's worth, these were all different ob/gyns - and they all offered a dating u/s - so I'm surprised to hear yours didn't. I suppose I thought that was standard these days.

OP here. Thanks for these anecdotes! I was measuring a little off with #2 but they wouldn't change my due date. I go to large university practices where I see a different person every time (by choice) and I wonder if that would contribute to their not wanting to change what another doc/midwife did?

I see posts about people getting early ultrasounds and wonder why they're getting them. When do you schedule it? After your first visit? I will ask my new practice what their standard policy is, but they're going to ask me for my LMP when I call to schedule an appointment.

The person who said it's only 4-5 days, that can make a big difference! I was 9 days overdue with #2 (according to my real due date). 9 + 5 = 14. 40 weeks + 14 days = pressure to induce starting at (not real) 41 weeks.

If I remember, I'm totally going to come back here in February and post what happened.

PP here, they should do the dating scan at your first visit when you think you're pregnant.