| What habits or practices help maintain a strong marriage? I'll begin by offering this: read one book your spouse recommends each year, make time for sex at least three times a week, and take up one common activity or pursuit. |
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For me:
- talk to each other every day - stay fit (both of you) - earn more than you spend - have sex at least a few times a week and make sure you satisfy your partner - if they bring up a problem or something they need you to change, listen with an open mind and be willing to make changes. |
| having time apart, whether on your own or with friends, now and again. |
| Stay fit. Avoid money troubles. Have stated goals. |
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Definitely stay fit. Bonus if you can do an active pursuit together (DH and I do obstacle races together once in awhile and it’s very fun).
Be kind just for the sake of being kind, without expecting anything in return. |
| Ability to resolve issues and conflicts effectively - not with arguing, not with avoiding, not with deflecting |
| Random small acts of kindness, physical touch a few times per day, making time for sex a few times per week, pro-actively planning date nights, keeping fit. |
| Going to bed at the same time when possible. This makes time for sex, cuddling, talk, or just one foot touching each other as you both snore away. |
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Both of you taking care of household and childcare responsibilities. If you both are home, it should be 50-50. I find it easier to have everyone chip in 10 minutes (kids too) to clean up each night.
Then you can hit the couch or bed at the same time. |
| Quote Robin Williams when talking to the kids: “Go ask your mother. She’s omnipotent!” |
| Quote Robin Williams when talking to the kids: “Go ask your mother. She’s omnipotent!” |
| Don't badmouth your spouse to others. |
| Laugh a lot together. |
| Time without the kids. Regular evenings out and a weekend away at least once a year. |
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Little things: making and bringing a cup of coffee to him/her in the morning, filling his/her car up with gas, taking care of little tasks that need done proactively. For example I had two boxes to mail out to my family. My husband mailed them without me even asking. He will take our donation box to Goodwill, make sure the house is dark and quiet when I get a migraine.
We both go out of our way to make life more enjoyable for the other. |