giving a boy a unisex name that is trending feminine?

[Anonymous]

we are considering the name Avery for our son. It has traditionally been a male name, but has become extremely popular for girls now (#38 in 2008 for girls according to ss admin whereas its in the mid 200s for boys). I'm trying to think about how this might affect our son--will it be seen as a 'girls' name or somehow too feminine for a boy (thus making him potentially prone to teasing?). I guess I like unisex names in general (jesse, sascha, ariel....) but dont want to give an overly feminine name to a boy, or an overly popular one.

[Anonymous]

I grew up / have worked with a Stacey, Shannon, Courtney and Sherril.

All of these men were very self-confident. Maybe having a unisex name trending feminine helped in that area?

[Anonymous]

How about making it his middle name?

[Anonymous]

My son has a unisex name trending feminine. It is a first name that runs in the family (males). He has had no problems yet but he is still young (elementary school). I have worked hard to instill in him a sense of pride in his name. You were named X because in our family _______. So far, he's game and seems quite proud.

[Anonymous]

I babysat for a family who had similar concerns about calling their son Oliver until they were sure that he would be able to "stand up to the teasing" if it were to happen, so for the first 2 years, everyone called him by his middle name, Alexander (I had no idea it was a middle name!). Then, the summer that he turned 2, they decided that he was "boy enough" to handle it if he got teased, and asked everyone to start calling him Oliver!
I know it's a little bit strange and extreme, but it made me think of it when you said you were worried about teasing- a name doesn't make a personality, I wouldn't worry about it!

[Anonymous]

DH and I love the name Alexei, but are probably going to avoid it for that reason. Plus, EVERYONE else we've mentioned it to hates it, even people that try to be nice about it. If people just didn't like it, that'd be one thing, but I just felt bad about the idea of my kid coming to me when he's 6 and saying "why did you give me a girl's name?" We've still got 12 weeks to go, so maybe we'll change our minds, but right now, we're thinking probably not.

FWIW, I think of Avery as a boy's name. My SIL was going to use it for a girl and Rielly was her boy name. I kept thinking how the names were great, if you just reversed which gender got which name.

[Anonymous]

I like Avery and think of it as a unisex name. If you like it - go for it. To the PP, I also like Alexi - if it didn't work out, he could always go with Alex or Lex, right? I think people should go with their preferences and not worry about what others think. The people around your child may have an initial bad reaction to the name, but eventually they get used to it and then can't picture the child with any other name. That's been my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I grew up / have worked with a Stacey, Shannon, Courtney and Sherril.

All of these men were very self-confident. Maybe having a unisex name trending feminine helped in that area?

Yes, my boss is named Terry and our lawyer's name is Lindsey. My DH's collegue is named Francis. Nothing wrong with "feminine" names for a man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I babysat for a family who had similar concerns about calling their son Oliver until they were sure that he would be able to "stand up to the teasing" if it were to happen, so for the first 2 years, everyone called him by his middle name, Alexander (I had no idea it was a middle name!). Then, the summer that he turned 2, they decided that he was "boy enough" to handle it if he got teased, and asked everyone to start calling him Oliver!
I know it's a little bit strange and extreme, but it made me think of it when you said you were worried about teasing- a name doesn't make a personality, I wouldn't worry about it!

Just had to comment that this post amuses me, since now Oliver is one of the super-trendy names! I know three Olivers under the age of three.

[Anonymous]

Ooh, I LOVE the name Avery. My DH won't go for it, for our son-to-be. He thinks it sounds like a "elderly hick farmer"... possibly because of Avery Arable in Charlotte's Web, or because I actually have an elderly relative named Avery who's a retired farmer... SIGH. FWIW, I think he's nuts, and I absolutely love the name--and both of us think it's a boy's name!

And I feel your pain -- I also like "Micah," which DH rejects because "it sounds like a girl's name." Argh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ooh, I LOVE the name Avery. My DH won't go for it, for our son-to-be. He thinks it sounds like a "elderly hick farmer"... possibly because of Avery Arable in Charlotte's Web, or because I actually have an elderly relative named Avery who's a retired farmer... SIGH. FWIW, I think he's nuts, and I absolutely love the name--and both of us think it's a boy's name!

And I feel your pain -- I also like "Micah," which DH rejects because "it sounds like a girl's name." Argh.

I think of Avery as a boy name BUT... why ask for a problem? I know of zero male Lindsey's. Oliver is a boy name only

[Anonymous]

I know adult men ~40-45 named Kim, Stacey and Shelley. When they were named in the 1960s, these were absolutely popular names trending female.

All 3 guys are cool and confident! 2 of the 3 are downright sexy.

[Anonymous]

OP here, thanks for the feedback. We're still cogitating. I actually have another first name I prefer, with Avery as middle, but DH's #1 is avery. ....Oh, and to 14:28, one of the other names we were considering was Alexei! (also Amory, until I decided it was too obscure). I love russian names--alexei, sascha, dmitri, etc.

[Anonymous]

I know a guy named Avery. I never thought he had a girl's name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I babysat for a family who had similar concerns about calling their son Oliver until they were sure that he would be able to "stand up to the teasing" if it were to happen, so for the first 2 years, everyone called him by his middle name, Alexander (I had no idea it was a middle name!). Then, the summer that he turned 2, they decided that he was "boy enough" to handle it if he got teased, and asked everyone to start calling him Oliver!
I know it's a little bit strange and extreme, but it made me think of it when you said you were worried about teasing- a name doesn't make a personality, I wouldn't worry about it!

who would make fun of an infant's name? i would think if there were to be any teasing that it would come in middle school and not by the age of 2!!