Do you miss friends you aren’t close to anymore?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been thinking about women I was very very close to at some point. We all grew up and went in different directions and seem to have not that many things in common anymore. It makes me sad.

[Anonymous]

I do.

I stayed in touch... surprisingly *until* Facebook.

Then we ‘liked’ and commented, instead of having email or phone conversations.

Then it drifted as fb and insta are dying a little. But before that too, when you just don’t know their kids, their jobs, their house. It’s hard to ask questions, when it always feels like catch up.

[Anonymous]

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Nope. If I did, we would still be close.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do.

I stayed in touch... surprisingly *until* Facebook.

Then we ‘liked’ and commented, instead of having email or phone conversations.

Then it drifted as fb and insta are dying a little. But before that too, when you just don’t know their kids, their jobs, their house. It’s hard to ask questions, when it always feels like catch up.

+1 I actually think that the advent of Facebook worsened my relationships. I really think that we'll see in a decade or so research about how detrimental social media has been to society and interpersonal relationships.

[Anonymous]

Friends? What are those?

1. Work
2. Family
3. Goto 1

[Anonymous]

Sometimes, some of them. Most times, no. If I really missed them I'd make an effort to be close to them again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been thinking about women I was very very close to at some point. We all grew up and went in different directions and seem to have not that many things in common anymore. It makes me sad.

I was thinking about my best friend from high school the other day. We had so much fun during those four years, and spent almost all our time together. But now our lives are so different, and that's part of why we've drifted apart. I guess sometimes I long for those carefree days of high school, but given how my life is now, I'm so glad I have the current friends I do because they are able to share in all of that with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do.

I stayed in touch... surprisingly *until* Facebook.

Then we ‘liked’ and commented, instead of having email or phone conversations.

Then it drifted as fb and insta are dying a little. But before that too, when you just don’t know their kids, their jobs, their house. It’s hard to ask questions, when it always feels like catch up.

+1 I actually think that the advent of Facebook worsened my relationships. I really think that we'll see in a decade or so research about how detrimental social media has been to society and interpersonal relationships.

Agree with this 100%.

[Anonymous]

No - only the ones of the opposite sex.

[Anonymous]

Yes and no. Like a PP mentioned, I had a lot of fun with them at the time, and miss that. But wife and mother happened, moves to new locations happened, and one got judge-y about me taking my DH's name when we got married and then about my sending my kid to Kindergarten with a Lunchable. So that happened...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do.

I stayed in touch... surprisingly *until* Facebook.

Then we ‘liked’ and commented, instead of having email or phone conversations.

Then it drifted as fb and insta are dying a little. But before that too, when you just don’t know their kids, their jobs, their house. It’s hard to ask questions, when it always feels like catch up.

I agree too. The longer it gets, the harder the conversations are. But I do miss a lot of them... nothing happened, just life. When we do see each other, it's great. But I haven't seen my college best friend in years and speak to her about once a year (we text about once a month).

[Anonymous]

I have come to accept that just because I am no longer friends with someone now, it does not mean that that relationship was any less meaningful. Things change, people move, time and distance impact relationships. But I still love those past friends, wish nothing but the best for them, and relish the memories I have with them. And if we ran into each other again- I would enjoy sharing some memories and catching up.

And when I think about these types of things, I try to remember to reach out to the people I currently have relationships with. Because it does take work to stay in touch...

[Anonymous]

https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2018/05/01/606588504/americans-are-a-lonely-lot-and-young-people-bear-the-heaviest-burden

I do think social media has had a detrimental effect on our one-to-one friendships.

I miss my old friends/ Most of them have moved away from here over the past two decades. It's hard to stay in touch.

[Anonymous]

I do, but also the associated context. My college friends were great at that time. First job friends and the parties. And so on.