Who do you talk to about problems in your relationship?

[Anonymous]

I'm going through a rough patch in my marriage now. When I met up with my girlfriends over the weekend, I hinted at things, but it started to feel like a betrayal, so I stopped talking. I want my friends to think well of my spouse, since assuming we get through this, I want us all to be able to continue group outings and get togethers. But on the flip side, I feel a need to talk through this.

Do you talk about marriage problems with your friends?

[Anonymous]

I talk with my spouse about problems in our marriage. We don't have major issues, though. If we did, we might speak with a marriage counselor or our parish priest.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't talk with my girlfriends or my sisters about marital problems. It would likely cause more trouble than it would help.

[Anonymous]

I talk to DH. If I needed to talk to an outside source I would probably talk to a therapist or maybe my dad. That sounds weird but my dad is a psychiatrist that does a lot of family counseling.

If it was about something DH had done that was very bad and I didn't think we were going to divorce I would never talk to any of our friends and family about it though.

[Anonymous]

Or honestly (this is PP again) I would talk to DCUM. Its weird but you can really work through some stuff here and get some tough love if needed.

[Anonymous]

I talk to DCUM. I don't want to involve family & friends, so I vent here.

[Anonymous]

It would have to be a very special friend, definitely not a group of GF's. If the problems were severe I'd speak with a professional.

[Anonymous]

MY husband, and if I am not ready for that my therapist. I personally don't like the idea of my friends knowing things before my husband does.

[Anonymous]

Boyfriend and I have very good communication, but if I’m stuck, I’ll come to DCUM.
I had to learn the hard way, unfortunately more than once, about talking to friends/Mom/sister (think, a couple bad ex boyfriends, me bitching, then getting back with them).

[Anonymous]

I talk to my spouse. NEVER talk to your family. I think girlfriends are safer than your family though.

[Anonymous]

Not friends. I am close with my dad, so sometimes I'll see what he thinks about an issue. My mom passed away 5 years ago, and my sister isn't someone I'd talk to about a relationship issue, though we get along fine.

[Anonymous]

Only my very best friend. We tell each other things and don't judge the other's husband. In a slightly larger group of friends one of them told us some stuff (but not all) and then got back with her husband and we all hate him. She said she feared that and we kind of pretend we're ok with it but none of us are. Of course we all wish her the best and are glad to see her happy, but we'll never be surprised when the other shoe drops and he pulls that shit again.

[Anonymous]

My therapist, and occasionally my mom. Not my friends.

[Anonymous]

I talk to my parents, we are very close and they are able to be objective. They love DH like a son and help me see his perspective and don't automatically take my side (which annoys me sometimes). I never tell my coworkers or friends, since I don't want their opinion of DH stained. I have a lot of coworkers who complain about their DH and never say a positive word about them, never understood why they want to portray their spouse as an incompetent loser to me.

[Anonymous]

DCUM! if nothing else, I get a few different view points between the mean/unhelpful posters. That’s usually enough for me to think through my feelings and appRoach DH more constructively.