Moms with DHs who work a lot on weekends

Anonymous
Do you plan a lot of playdates? Do you do activities with your children? My DH works a lot on the weekends so I try and plan at least one playdate or activity a weekend with the kids (1 and 3). I cannot stay in the house with them all weekend, it drives me batty. Sometimes DH doesn't have to work and will join us but most of the time its us by ourselves. What do other Moms (or dads if the situation is reversed) do on the weekends with their kids if they are parenting solo? Sometimes my DH says he would like a weekend where nothing is planned and he can just relax. But I can't just not plan anything and then hope he doesn't work that one weekend so we can do something together. So I usually make plans and if he can join great, if not then we do it on our own.

I am a little bit nervous on how to handle more kids in this equation. We are thinking of having a 3rd and I can't seem to wrap my head around doing a solo outing with 3 kids. I guess we will cross that bridge when we get there.
Anonymous
I work every other weekend and DW works one weekend every 6 weeks.
DD does one class on the weekend ( currently gymnastics) and we have 2 sets of friends who also have spouses who work weekends so do a lot of things with them.
DW takes DD to see her parents on the Sunday afternoons that I work, so they see her twice a month.
Anonymous
Play dates (sometimes with one other kid, sometimes with the entire preschool class), trips to see friends who live within 4 hours of us (and yes, I did this even when they were the age of your youngest, and I have twins, so they were both babies), day trips to see friends who live within 2 hours of us, planned activities at home that can be rescheduled (i.e. Play Doh can be used anytime), planned activities for just us nearby (think Smithsonians, play place, etc.). Now that the weather is warming up, you can spend more time outside, which I always think is easier. Join a pool. Your three-year-old is old enough to swim safely on their own and you can be with the little one. My husband and I would take both of our girls swimming alone when they were two and three. Find a pool with a kiddie pool, which makes it way more relaxing.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Play dates (sometimes with one other kid, sometimes with the entire preschool class), trips to see friends who live within 4 hours of us (and yes, I did this even when they were the age of your youngest, and I have twins, so they were both babies), day trips to see friends who live within 2 hours of us, planned activities at home that can be rescheduled (i.e. Play Doh can be used anytime), planned activities for just us nearby (think Smithsonians, play place, etc.). Now that the weather is warming up, you can spend more time outside, which I always think is easier. Join a pool. Your three-year-old is old enough to swim safely on their own and you can be with the little one. My husband and I would take both of our girls swimming alone when they were two and three. Find a pool with a kiddie pool, which makes it way more relaxing.


All of these things. I have a 4 yo, a 2 yo, and a 6 mo.
Anonymous
I take the kids on outings. Sometimes I plan to meet up with friends, but only if I know for sure my husband has to work that weekend. I also go nuts staying home with the kids all weekend.
Anonymous
I have a 4 year old. We have one class on the weekend (swimming). We also try to meet up with friends at least once or twice during the weekend or do a playdate (almost always us inviting friends over, no one reciprocates).

We usually eat out at least once or twice because when I'm parenting solo I don't feel like cooking.

Overall it's fine, but lonely for me.
Anonymous
One thing I like to do on weekend evenings I am on my own is host a little "movie night" at my house and in its friends kids over. It isn't that much more work for me, my friends get a little date night, and my kids enjoy it.
Anonymous
Best thing is to find a circle of friends with similar age kids. It's the best. You can easily go to the parks together, different events, etc. The kids keep each other busy while the adults can rest and chat.
Anonymous
For the life of me I can’t understand why you would want more kids.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:For the life of me I can’t understand why you would want more kids.


+1
If you’re overwhelmed at the idea of taking care of 3 kids by yourself on weekends (and understandably so), then unless your husbamd’s Schedule is going to drastically change, it seems illogical to have another kid. Why make your life even harder?
Anonymous
I have a 4 and 2 year-old (and am expecting #3). My DH works some part of most weekends, but it’s flexible and from home, and I often work one weekend morning out of the house. We also can’t stay home all weekend. We try to have one weekend class scheduled. Try a Tinkergarten class or another class with a wider age range so you can enroll them together. We also go to the playground for a few hours unless the weather is truly terrible. We use indoor playgrounds when we need to and just pay. Also places like the Building Museum and the Zoo. Your kids are a little younger, but it actually gets easier soon when they can engage more in outings.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:For the life of me I can’t understand why you would want more kids.


+1
If you’re overwhelmed at the idea of taking care of 3 kids by yourself on weekends (and understandably so), then unless your husbamd’s Schedule is going to drastically change, it seems illogical to have another kid. Why make your life even harder?


Kids are babies for a very short time. Three kids over age 5 are easy to manage. Have the third!
Anonymous
Op here ...thanks for all the helpful comments! I actually feel like 2 are pretty easy even though they are close in age (19 months apart). Plus I know babyhood is such a short time and we want a big family.

I am so happy the weather is nice out again! We can spend hours at the park which has been amazing!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:For the life of me I can’t understand why you would want more kids.


+1
If you’re overwhelmed at the idea of taking care of 3 kids by yourself on weekends (and understandably so), then unless your husbamd’s Schedule is going to drastically change, it seems illogical to have another kid. Why make your life even harder?


Kids are babies for a very short time. Three kids over age 5 are easy to manage. Have the third!


Sorry but I don't agree with this at all. My three kids are SO busy on the weekends, so I'm lucky that my husband works fewer hours now on the weekend than he did when they were younger. With three kids, even one sport or activity a season can really add up - we often have three games and practices in a single weekend day plus church and class birthday parties. That's exhausting for one parent to handle solo, and I find carpools are harder arrange on the weekends because that's family time for many people. I suppose if you were the type of family who doesn't do organized sports or other activities, it could be easier because your children could be each other's playmates, but that certainly isn't the norm for kids in my area on the weekends.

Think carefully about a third unless your husband's schedule will change.
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