Just kicked my boyfriend out because I’m an insecure loser

[Anonymous]

I’ve been battling ppd since the birth of our daughter 5 months ago. I’m also extremely insecure because I went from a victoria secret model to a thick chick with stretch marks. My breasts have also changed a lot since breastfeeding and I just brought it up with him tonight if he thinks that I should get a boob job..he saud yes, ge thinks I should. That made me feel like shit so I got quiet and sat at the table. He layed on the couch and started going through his phone. He acknowledged that I was feeling shitty about myself in that moment. He continued to scroll through facebook . About a half an hour passed and he must have forgot that I was sitting behind him because he saw a black chick in a bikini on his timeline. He literally stared at it for 5 minutes. His ex is black, I am not. He then clicked on her name which brought him to her profile, he clicked through some photos, backed out back on to her page and looked back to see where I was. I think the fact that he looked back to see where I was made me think he was about to message her or something so I said “Yeah, busted...” and told him to leave.

I know it’s so overdramatic but it’s valentines day WHY are you looking at other women when you should be with me and he knows how bad I’m feeling about my body...he obviously feels the same way. And the fact that she’s a different race than me makes me think he misses his ex or he’s not really in to white women as much as he claims.

It really just broke my heart. Am I a horrible person? How would you have handled ghis?

[Anonymous]

PPD is serious, OP. if you are formally diagnosed with it, you need to be treated and follow-up regularly with your doctor.

Your body image might be important to you, but honestly the way you describe it makes you appear super whiny for no good reason. Your baby is only 5 months old. You CAN get into shape again, but it will take time.

And obviously he was wrong to be interested in other women, and he doesn't seem as invested in this relationship as he should be. Do you also understand how the two would be related? Your reactions and his reactions?
You're pushing him away, and he seems only too glad to go.

[Anonymous]

Nothing in OP's post is PPD.

EMotional abuse and racism are ugly OP. You need to grow up, you aren't a child anymore you have a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing in OP's post is PPD.

EMotional abuse and racism are ugly OP. You need to grow up, you aren't a child anymore you have a child.

How am I being racist?

[Anonymous]

Op you've got a kid now you need to grow up.

Get your ppd treated and get your relationship out of '23 year olds screwing around' mode. Your boyfriend sounds like an insensitive d and you sound a little like a drama queen. Focus on the baby, get healthy and stop engaging in teenager love games.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op you've got a kid now you need to grow up.

Get your ppd treated and get your relationship out of '23 year olds screwing around' mode. Your boyfriend sounds like an insensitive d and you sound a little like a drama queen. Focus on the baby, get healthy and stop engaging in teenager love games.

Ps: I'm not saying it's not legitimate to feel weird/ bad about your body post baby. But you need to accept that things will never be the same likely. You can get in shape and look great though, it just won't be the same. You need to let go of your old life and embrace the new.

[Anonymous]

Are you getting treated for your PPD?

It will likely take your body a year to pull itself together fully, give it some time. It didn't change overnight, so don't expect a celebrity-style snapback.

Your boyfriend probably agreed with your comment about the boob job because he's tired of hearing you complain and would welcome any action that would make you feel better about yourself (but see my second note. No scheduleing surgery just yet.

But seriously, get your PPD treated.

[Anonymous]

Did you have a child with this boyfriend or are you recently divorced?
If you are not divorced..
What made you have a child before marriage?
When will women learn to respect themselves to wait until they get married before they have kids?

Once you have kids, it's downhill from there. That's why you need a committed partner before ge t to that point in your life..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you have a child with this boyfriend or are you recently divorced?
If you are not divorced..
What made you have a child before marriage?
When will women learn to respect themselves to wait until they get married before they have kids?

Once you have kids, it's downhill from there. That's why you need a committed partner before ge t to that point in your life..

This is so helpful. Perhaps she should put the baby back in?
Look, I think having children out of wedlock is generally a piss poor idea too, but how are your statements helping the OP right now?

[Anonymous]

Why do you keep mentioning race?

[Anonymous]

Normally I'd say you overreacted but that's pretty clear cut and dried right there. He's an asshole.

[Anonymous]

OP, no one else here has any real life experience so let me tell you first: he did that because he is an ass. It isn’t about you. Dump him, get child support and turn your life around so a decent man will fall in love with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you keep mentioning race?

Because his ex is black and the girl he was admiring was black...I am not. It just made me feel shitty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you keep mentioning race?

Not OP. It is relevant as it similar to an ex, not because she is specifically black. It would be the same if his ex was a redhead and he was paying extra attention to a redhead.

[Anonymous]

Focus on your career and your baby. Your life has changed. Wishing you the best...