"You leave early"

[Anonymous]

Sigh. My boss made this comment about me at a work-related social event, with somewhat negative/derisive tone. I was like he was labeling me. Yes, I do leave earlier than I used to, but I also get in earlier. I work the same number of hours as before I had DC, but I've just pushed them earlier so I have more time at home at night. I explained this when I returned from maternity leave, and no issue has ever been raised about it. (I will and have stayed late if something pressing comes up, or do work/check Blackberry in the evenings.) But clearly my lack of "face time" by switching my schedule has made the impression that I'm less available or work less. The remark wasn't a surprise - I've sensed for awhile that there was this perspective - but it underscored that I was correct. So what do I do? Bring it up? Maybe. But I don't want to be told to switch my schedule back (plus I know plenty of parents working elsewhere who leave when I do, or earlier, so what I'm doing isn't out of the ordinary). Blow it off? That's what I have been doing, because the market isn't good to switch jobs and we need my income. But it gets pretty frustrating that I'm less valued just because I want to switch my hours to spend more time with DC. Any other ideas?

[Anonymous]

My first thought is to air this out with your boss at a neutral time. But then, I've got great bosses who really work with me and who are reasonable. Your boss's derisive tone makes me worry a little that he's not very reasonable. But you know him better than me.

[Anonymous]

I don't have any ideas, but I hate the term and concept of face-time, it is so ridiculous.
I don't care that much anymore, and I am working 40 hours a week. Hey, that is what I am supposed to work anyway, why is this so wrong?

[Anonymous]

I think it depends on your career aspirations, performance, industry etc.

My advice - step back and decide what are the implications of your boss having this perspective. Some things to think about include: Are your raises or bonus lower? Have your performance reviews suffered? If your company was having lay-offs might you be one of hte 1st to go? How long have you / will you work for this person?

Based on your answers to these questions you can decide if you need to discuss this concern that your boss has or if it is something that you let go.

Also, just b/c you know other parents who shifted their work hours, it really may not be OK within the culture of your organization. So if you want to/need to fit in, switching back to the hours that are expected where you work might be required.

[Anonymous]

I think this is not a sign of doom but just part of the reacclimation period after coming back from maternity leave. I would take the high road and show that you're a proactive, team-oriented professional (unlke him!).

Unfortunately, there are a lot of people in Washington who equate face time with productivity and dedication, and when you're on maternity leave, your company has all that time to see what life is like without you...so rather than start in a defensive posture, I would set-up a "progress report" type meeting, position it as an opportunity for you to update him on all your projects and stuff you're being proactive on, and any measures of productivity, profitability, or client happiness you might have. Ask for feedback--what could be better, what is going well? Hopefully at this point, you've demonstrated that you're an exemplary employee, and the answer to those questions is "keep doing what you're doing", but you've essentially started to show him other measures of how you're successfully contributing. I would not begin from the premise that there is no value to "face time" however, because it means different things to different bosses--building team cohesion, opening up opportunities to share ideas in a less structured, creative, emergent manner. It depends on the culture of your organization of course. Just be ready for different ways to address what they need, so if he expresses something like "some members of the team feel like you're not available when you need them" (this comes up in my office, where everyone has some sort of flexible schedule) be prepared to offer positive suggestions for ways to get around this, like, "lease know that I am committed to this work unit and can be available via email, phone or text message if something comes up." or similar.

It's tough to navigate the working out of home mom thing--hang in there!

[Anonymous]

You need to address this with him. You don't want the false impression of being less dedicated to make you an early candidate for any future RIFs. Can you do alter your schedule so you come in during normal hours for 3 days a week? Or be available by email after hours if you don't already do this? Maybe send email during certain times to give the impression that you are around and available. Hopefully after the economic shake out, face time will be a thing of the past and employers will use technology more readily. Read, telecommuting. He must be old. But that's ok, he'll be pushed out as the fat is trimmed and old dogs who can't learn new tricks will be gone.

[Anonymous]

I heard similar complaints about my work schedule earlier in the year. Given the economy and my need/desire to keep this job AND my current hours, I have let the issue go. I figure if I raise it, and my bosses tell me flat out they want me to work more hours, then I've really backed my self into a corner, which is not a good position given this economy.

[Anonymous]

From another person who used to work later hours and now works earlier hours, I feel your pain. It is amazing how BIG of a deal it is for me to leave on time (because it is 30 minutes before my VP leaves) and yet everyone else can come in late all the time or leave early because they work later hours.

I don't know your situation, but I find that even though comments are made sometimes, overall my work is appreciated. I make sure to always offer to do work from home or do it when i come in the next day. I make sure to get my work done. And overall I am appreciated. I just learn to brush off comments or looks when I leave.

However, if you feel your boss is really judging you negatively, schedule a sit down talk and ask if there is something about your schedule that is bothering him - and if so - is there something you can do (besides working later hours) to fix it. Maybe he just needs to be reassured that if he leaves work for you, you will do it first thing in the morning. Or maybe he just needs you to check your blackberry when you first get home (if this is reasonable to you). Also, just having the talk might help (either reassure him or reassure you that his comments don't mean anything).

[Anonymous]

I just re-read your post (I just replied). If you just recently returned from maternity leave, blow the comment off. There is definetly an adjustment perioud to returning.

[Anonymous]

If this were a just world, you would have been able to throw back to him: "and you arrive late." But alas...

[Anonymous]

another reminder is to make sure people are aware that you are there before them - doing work.

on a daily basis send out an email 1st thing when you arrive so that they know you are there way before them. next, when they come in walk by their desk and say "I know you just got in, but I wanted to make sure you were aware of .... I sent you an email about this, but if you can take a look I would greatly appreciate it."

[Anonymous]

I agree with PP about sending an email to boss first thing when you arrive in the morning. Also, keep a record of when you arrive and leave (even if just on your calendar) so that when you have discussions you can show clearly that you are putting in the time. He sounds like someone who needs to know you are being productive. Maybe at the end of each week send him a project update - letting him know what you accomplished during the week, what you're working on, etc.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks - the commiseration helps. To be clear, I've haven't just returned from maternity leave - this has been going on for several years. I'm also not at risk for being laid off, but my career is definitely suffering because I'm not being groomed for a promotion. I think they think that they are being great because they are "family friendly," (which is true in that my schedule gives be a better balance), but they don't get that treating me like a second class employee because I have a different schedule isn't very family friendly.

[Anonymous]

IMHO, I would confidentially speak to HR. I wish that is the path I had taken when I was in a similar situation. At first, there were little comments like that (perhaps my boss was testing the waters?) Then came the reduced merit increase and bonus payment because I was now on - and I quote - the "mommy track." Really, really wish I had formally documented things the entire time.

[Anonymous]

Seems to me that you are in CYA (Cover Your A$$) mode. Not in that you will be fired but that it may work against you. Appears you may be on that path.

Document everything. Arrival/lunch/leave times. Note how much time you spend on the BB at home. When and if you're challenged, you can bring that out.

If you can, stay later one night/week. Make yourself visible on that day.

I think the idea of "progress reports" are good. As is keeping your boss in the loop as much as possible. If he/she questions the increased information, you can delicately respond that you were concerned -based on his/her prior comment(s)- that you were not providing as much information about progress/status as s/he liked. So, you were attempting to remedy that.