Aunt mad at me?

[Anonymous]

My aunt had a boyfriend for 7 years until she discovered he was cheating. She broke up with him months ago and I told a relative about it. Now my aunt is hounding me why I told a relative he kicked her out or whatever. One it was months ago and I don’t remember what I said. She kept asking why I said this, why I said that so I asked why she made my mom (her sister) do her homework instead of doing it herself. She got mad and now won’t answer the phone. She refuses to talk to me at all, which is fine but what did I do to upset her?

[Anonymous]

Your aunt is being very immature. Hopefully time will ease things.

But in general OP, don't be the bearer of other peoples' news. It's not yours to tell.

[Anonymous]

What in heavens name does your mom doing her homework for her have to do with the situation at hand? What an odd thing to say. It’s like you were trying to provoke her. Wouldn’t the homework situation have been years/decades ago? How did your aunt “make” your mom do it anyway? Was your mom not capable of saying no?

Why were you gossiping about your aunt in the first place? Your aunt was pushing boundaries by asking you repeatedly, but there are better ways of setting boundaries than rehashing what looks to be a years old argument or sore spot between sisters. Stop gossiping about people and they’ll stop asking you what you said about them.

[Anonymous]

Stop gossiping about people. Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

Hard lesson to learn, but an important one - people own their own lives and they are the only ones who have the right to decide if, when, and with whom they share their private lives. It was not your business to gossip about her pain, that was wrong to do. If she wanted others in her family to know, she would have told them. Then when she approached you to discuss it you were rude. You’re immature with poor social skills, this can be a learning opportunity for you. She is very reasonably angry and hurt, has no reason to want to have any future relationship with you since you behaved badly and hurt her. You should write her a note, apologize and explain you’ve learned from this and will not gossip about other’s private lives again. Maybe she’ll forgive if you are young; but I doubt she will ever trust you as a confident or with personal information again. Trust is earned, not given. You behaved badly and should stop trying to play the victim - you own the fault here.

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine you have many friends OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hard lesson to learn, but an important one - people own their own lives and they are the only ones who have the right to decide if, when, and with whom they share their private lives. It was not your business to gossip about her pain, that was wrong to do. If she wanted others in her family to know, she would have told them. Then when she approached you to discuss it you were rude. You’re immature with poor social skills, this can be a learning opportunity for you. She is very reasonably angry and hurt, has no reason to want to have any future relationship with you since you behaved badly and hurt her. You should write her a note, apologize and explain you’ve learned from this and will not gossip about other’s private lives again. Maybe she’ll forgive if you are young; but I doubt she will ever trust you as a confident or with personal information again. Trust is earned, not given. You behaved badly and should stop trying to play the victim - you own the fault here.

Exactly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My aunt had a boyfriend for 7 years until she discovered he was cheating. She broke up with him months ago and I told a relative about it. Now my aunt is hounding me why I told a relative he kicked her out or whatever. One it was months ago and I don’t remember what I said. She kept asking why I said this, why I said that so I asked why she made my mom (her sister) do her homework instead of doing it herself. She got mad and now won’t answer the phone. She refuses to talk to me at all, which is fine but what did I do to upset her?

What in the world does the above have to do with you gossiping about your aunt?

You should have taken responsibility for your actions and apologized, but instead you deflected by bringing up a completely unrelated topic. You gossiped unnecessarily and from your attitude in your post I suspect you did it willingly and enthusiastically, even you're claiming ignorance to the fact now. You hurt your aunt during a difficult time for her and now then you take it out on her even more? You need to grow up and take responsibility for your actions. Do it soon or no one will want to deal with you....if I were your aunt I would write you off as an immature brat that cannot be trusted. And that's a reputation that is hard to change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My aunt had a boyfriend for 7 years until she discovered he was cheating. She broke up with him months ago and I told a relative about it. Now my aunt is hounding me why I told a relative he kicked her out or whatever. One it was months ago and I don’t remember what I said. She kept asking why I said this, why I said that so I asked why she made my mom (her sister) do her homework instead of doing it herself. She got mad and now won’t answer the phone. She refuses to talk to me at all, which is fine but what did I do to upset her?

What in the world does the above have to do with you gossiping about your aunt?

You should have taken responsibility for your actions and apologized, but instead you deflected by bringing up a completely unrelated topic. You gossiped unnecessarily and from your attitude in your post I suspect you did it willingly and enthusiastically, even you're claiming ignorance to the fact now. You hurt your aunt during a difficult time for her and now then you take it out on her even more? You need to grow up and take responsibility for your actions. Do it soon or no one will want to deal with you....if I were your aunt I would write you off as an immature brat that cannot be trusted. And that's a reputation that is hard to change.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hard lesson to learn, but an important one - people own their own lives and they are the only ones who have the right to decide if, when, and with whom they share their private lives. It was not your business to gossip about her pain, that was wrong to do. If she wanted others in her family to know, she would have told them. Then when she approached you to discuss it you were rude. You’re immature with poor social skills, this can be a learning opportunity for you. She is very reasonably angry and hurt, has no reason to want to have any future relationship with you since you behaved badly and hurt her. You should write her a note, apologize and explain you’ve learned from this and will not gossip about other’s private lives again. Maybe she’ll forgive if you are young; but I doubt she will ever trust you as a confident or with personal information again. Trust is earned, not given. You behaved badly and should stop trying to play the victim - you own the fault here.

Exactly.

Ditto.