Is anyone else concerned about their kid being in AAP?

[Anonymous]

Kind of an offshoot of the thread asking why folks aren't being more supportive of each other, I wondered if anyone else is in the boat my wife and I are in with our child.

Our daughter is smart and an avid reader. She does well on her tests but doesn't get everything correct, makes mistakes here and there she probably shouldn't have made, that sort of thing. She did well on the NNAT last year, a 120, which is clearly very good nationally, though apparently average by the standards and scores I see posted in this forum. We figured we had a pretty smart kid and were happy with the way she is progressing. I'm not particularly judgmental of anyone's parenting style, but my wife and I are "let kids be kids" types and don't test prep or anything like that.

That being said, the CoGat shocked us. I don't want to get into too many specifics for anonymity sake, but her composite percentile rank (age score) was in the high 90's, she aced the verbal section, and her local percentile ranks were a few ticks lower but still in the mid 90's, unsurprising given how highly educated this area is. She got referred in on her own and while I answered the parent survey, we didn't do work samples or anything, and I have no idea what her GBRS thing might be.

Based on everything I've read here, she has a very high likelihood of being admitted into the AAP program, and that worries me a little bit. Not that we don't want what is best for her, but certain things bother me. For instance, her grade often has optional projects, which she never does, and has no interest in doing. She does her homework, such as it is, and is in fact very aware of things being due and wanting to get them done on time, but she frequently half-asses it and does the bare minimum to get things done, we have to force her to take more time, neaten things up, etc.

To make things worse, I probably stepped in it telling her what AAP was. I had explained to her that being referred meant that the school identified her to potentially be able to handle accelerated learning, which I thought was a nice way of describing it. She got really excited about it, and now talks about it a lot, and I feel like I'm constantly having to temper expectations, explain that not everyone gets in but that the fact that she was considered in the first place is very impressive. That sort of thing, trying to be supportive while preparing her in case it doesn't work out. And of course, this progressed in her own mind to "If I don't get in does that mean I'm not smart" which started a whole new round of conversations about how she was plenty smart, if she did get in she shouldn't think that way about kids who aren't in. We've gone over level III, how everyone winds up having the same classes available in HS, how plenty of kids are smart but don't do well on tests. Frankly, I've discussed this to death with her from all angles, but she's the one who keeps bringing it up. I'd prefer to forget about it until April.

Anyway, tangent over. Has anyone else, past or current, had concerns about their child qualifying but having potential hiccups if they are admitted, or is everyone here 100% full go? How would you handle the situation above? I feel like I'm doing a good job, I just want to make sure she maintains her confidence either way, and if she does get in, isn't mean to her friends that don't. Or allows anyone to look down on her if she doesn't make it. Advice would certainly be appreciated.

[Anonymous]

It's only January. Stop talking about AAP.

[Anonymous]

WIth really high scores and GBRS she probably should be in AAP to be challenged. Perhaps she bored...? Remember you can always pull your child out of AAP if it doesn't seem like the right fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Kind of an offshoot of the thread asking why folks aren't being more supportive of each other, I wondered if anyone else is in the boat my wife and I are in with our child.

Our daughter is smart and an avid reader. She does well on her tests but doesn't get everything correct, makes mistakes here and there she probably shouldn't have made, that sort of thing. She did well on the NNAT last year, a 120, which is clearly very good nationally, though apparently average by the standards and scores I see posted in this forum. We figured we had a pretty smart kid and were happy with the way she is progressing. I'm not particularly judgmental of anyone's parenting style, but my wife and I are "let kids be kids" types and don't test prep or anything like that.

That being said, the CoGat shocked us. I don't want to get into too many specifics for anonymity sake, but her composite percentile rank (age score) was in the high 90's, she aced the verbal section, and her local percentile ranks were a few ticks lower but still in the mid 90's, unsurprising given how highly educated this area is. She got referred in on her own and while I answered the parent survey, we didn't do work samples or anything, and I have no idea what her GBRS thing might be.

Based on everything I've read here, she has a very high likelihood of being admitted into the AAP program, and that worries me a little bit. Not that we don't want what is best for her, but certain things bother me. For instance, her grade often has optional projects, which she never does, and has no interest in doing. She does her homework, such as it is, and is in fact very aware of things being due and wanting to get them done on time, but she frequently half-asses it and does the bare minimum to get things done, we have to force her to take more time, neaten things up, etc.

To make things worse, I probably stepped in it telling her what AAP was. I had explained to her that being referred meant that the school identified her to potentially be able to handle accelerated learning, which I thought was a nice way of describing it. She got really excited about it, and now talks about it a lot, and I feel like I'm constantly having to temper expectations, explain that not everyone gets in but that the fact that she was considered in the first place is very impressive. That sort of thing, trying to be supportive while preparing her in case it doesn't work out. And of course, this progressed in her own mind to "If I don't get in does that mean I'm not smart" which started a whole new round of conversations about how she was plenty smart, if she did get in she shouldn't think that way about kids who aren't in. We've gone over level III, how everyone winds up having the same classes available in HS, how plenty of kids are smart but don't do well on tests. Frankly, I've discussed this to death with her from all angles, but she's the one who keeps bringing it up. I'd prefer to forget about it until April.

Anyway, tangent over. Has anyone else, past or current, had concerns about their child qualifying but having potential hiccups if they are admitted, or is everyone here 100% full go? How would you handle the situation above? I feel like I'm doing a good job, I just want to make sure she maintains her confidence either way, and if she does get in, isn't mean to her friends that don't. Or allows anyone to look down on her if she doesn't make it. Advice would certainly be appreciated.

We're at a center school, and kids talk about it anyway. I'm not sure telling her made things any worse. However, I will say that even the nice AAP kids seem to end up bragging about it. It's like they can't help themselves. My daughter frequently comes home telling me that she is teased for not being in AAP. I think it's just one or two kids doing it, but it's unfortunate that it's happening.

[Anonymous]

I have kids in a center school, one in AAP and the other in 2nd grade. We were in a private school before that and my older child heard all about AAP from friends on the soccer field, etc etc., so there's no hiding from it. I've definitely seen a stark line between AAP and non-AAP. The kids know it, the school knows it, ignoring it doesn't work. From what you written, you want the best for you kid and being around other kids that are motivated (either internally or from their parents, whatever) will open up the chance to try and learn new things so that can't be a bad thing. No matter where, there's always someone who works harder, wants it more, whatever - I think the best is to put the kid in a situation where they figure stuff out and be there to lend a hand. What you might regret is not giving her a chance in that environment and later she wonders why. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have kids in a center school, one in AAP and the other in 2nd grade. We were in a private school before that and my older child heard all about AAP from friends on the soccer field, etc etc., so there's no hiding from it. I've definitely seen a stark line between AAP and non-AAP. The kids know it, the school knows it, ignoring it doesn't work. From what you written, you want the best for you kid and being around other kids that are motivated (either internally or from their parents, whatever) will open up the chance to try and learn new things so that can't be a bad thing. No matter where, there's always someone who works harder, wants it more, whatever - I think the best is to put the kid in a situation where they figure stuff out and be there to lend a hand. What you might regret is not giving her a chance in that environment and later she wonders why. Good luck!

+100

[Anonymous]

From what I can tell, there is no more homework / projects in AAP than at our base school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: She does her homework, such as it is, and is in fact very aware of things being due and wanting to get them done on time, but she frequently half-asses it and does the bare minimum to get things done, we have to force her to take more time, neaten things up, etc.
.

Many kids are like that. I wouldn't worry at all.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like you have a perfectly normal child ?. She’ll probably do just fine, wherever she lands.

[Anonymous]

I, too, worry about kids talking overly talk about it at school or bragging/looking down so I chose not to talk about it at least for now. It’s not too late to deal with it when admission is finalized and at that point, kind of have to tell kid what’s going to happen. I know my child way too well to talk about it now.

[Anonymous]

OP, stop with the humble brag

[Anonymous]

She’s excited about it?

She’ll do well.

[Anonymous]

I have three in AAP and they are all like you describe your dd. They are not overachiever types and they'd rather play outside or watch TV. They do what they need to do to get by. They're fine. Being found capable of greater challenge and an accelerated pace does not mean they are perfectionists or love school and always strive for 4's.

Re: having told your dd, it would've been much better if you hadn't, but that's water under the bridge. Hopefully, she's an empathetic and sensitive girl who doesn't use that information to brag or make other kids feel inferior, as many kids in AAP do.

[Anonymous]

My center school attending kids never heard of aap until I told them abt out it the day of the orientation. Clearly from this post she didnt know til you blabbed. Yours is the kid likely talking to others about it. Is downplay it and try to change your wording. If she's thinking not being admitted means she's not smart, you've conveyed a terrible message to her about her classmates that aren't admitted.

[Anonymous]

BTDT, kids are now out of HS and in HS. She will be fine and may be a bit bored in AAP. Go for it if she's admitted. We just told our DKs it's a program for kids that learn differently.