Catholic school experience if you aren't religious

[Anonymous]

Anyone send their child to Catholic School even though you aren't religious at home? I'm considering sending my son to the local Catholic School to avoid the public elementary.

[Anonymous]

My son has several non-Catholics in his class at his K-8. The students have to attend Mass and participate in Religion class along with everyone else, and add a lot to the conversation. But it is important to keep in mind the Religious component as Catholic schools are religious schools. Tour your local school and see if it is a good fit for your family.

[Anonymous]

OP, I would definitely try hard to find some non-Catholic families who send their kids to that school and ask them frankly what their experiences have been. And of course tour the school as well, and have a sit-down talk with an administrator about any concerns you have.

I think a lot may depend on whether you are OK with the school requiring your child to attend masses and take the religious education class(es). If your family is Christian but not Catholic, you might have to do some talking at home about details like why Catholics have a Pope but your own denomination does not, etc. In elementary years this all may not matter that much. If your family is secular, you should think through what you might say if your child comes home and expects your family should go to mass as well, etc. I'm not saying not to send your child! I'm saying just think through possible questions it could raise for your child's religious (or secular) upbringing outside school. Questions are a good thing!

We don't have a kid in Catholic school but our niece has been in Catholic schools all the way and this is her last year of high school. Her parents are very secular, though her grandfather was a Protestant minister so she's been to Protestant services at times growing up (her family does not attend church other than when seen the grandparents). It has worked out very well for her academically because in their area this is the best school by far, and from what she tells us about classes, the teachers are very open to discussions about everything. Our niece isn't personally religious at all but knows a lot about not just Catholicism but many religions since she has had to do "world religions" classes in this particular school. Just FYI, because this is HS level, of course, not elementary.

[Anonymous]

I think it really depends on the school. Even among Catholic schools, there are big differences. When we toured several a few years back, some were openly accepting of kids from other religions and had large populations of non-Catholics; others were willing to take anyone, but warned us that they were very parish-based and had few students out of parish, much less out of religion. Asking the school is very useful - they were always very honest with us, and you can tell a lot from their attitude.

In the end we went public (mistake), so I can't tell you how Catholic school turned out.

[Anonymous]

I did 2nd - 12th at Catholic schools, as a non Catholic. I agree it depends on the school and also on the teachers. I got crap about my faith from teachers, not students (in the lower grades only, in my case).
Also ask about teacher qualifications and training: don't assume it will be academically rigorous just because you're paying.
Socially, most of the kids were my neighbors so that helped. Small classes with little turnover, which has pros and cons. Second grade was the hardest because of all the First Communion activities I had to attend but not participate in during the school day.

[Anonymous]

Op I encourage you to try your local public school.
My DD attends a focus school that all the white people say is not a good school, high farms rate etc.
She is thriving there, currently in 1st grade and loves her teacher and loved her K teacher as well. Class size maxes out at 16 because of extra funding so she gets more attention ( as do all the kids) than my friends kids in the "nicer" school where there are 25 kids in a class.
I volunteer in the class a couple of times a month and interact with the kids, they are nice kids.
Try it, you might like it.

[Anonymous]

It depends a lot on the school. There's no substitute for visiting the classrooms on a typical day to get a sense for a school's culture.

I taught at a Catholic school that had weekly chapel and mass on special occasions. The children attended religion classes for which the diocese dictated the number of hours per week. The days also began and ended with prayers in addition to announcements, Pledge of Allegiance, etc. As a Protestant, I did not find any of the routines and rituals particularly burdensome or conflicting with my beliefs. Someone of a different religion or an atheist might have found the daily religious practices boring. That said, our religious studies faculty were relatively sensitive to the diversity of beliefs at the school. Even among the Catholic families, there was a range of social and political views. Lessons and homilies tended to focus more on community service and leading and ethical life than on doctrinal issues and detailed Bible study.

Outside of day-to-day routines, a school's religious affiliation can come up in other ways. If sex education is a particular concern to you, you may ask the school about the grades in which it is taught and the school's philosophy of teaching. You might be surprised to know that some Catholic schools teach the science of sex and reproduction in separate classes from those where they address the religious and moral aspects of human sexuality. However, I suspect that most Catholic schools devote fewer hours overall to sex ed, and are probably less progressive about LGBTQIA issues. One's Catholic affiliation can also come up as a social issue. It's not that children are particularly unpleasant or exclusive to non-Catholic students. However, the families who know each other from attending the same churches may have an easier time forming friendships.

[Anonymous]

Catholic schools can be very insular. I wouldn't expect it to go well for a family who wasn't religious sending their children to one.

[Anonymous]

OP I'm a product of Catholic school (K - 12, nuns, uniforms), I'm very much not religious at all now. I'm moving my child to Catholic School this month (4th grade) because I don't feel my Title one FCPS is cutting it. I've told my child to be respectful, listen to the religious lessons, and make up her own mind about what she wants to believe in her heart.

The Catholic schools I've looked at teach the equivalent of FLE (sex ed) and that's an ongoing conversation I have with my kids anyway. I feel that the smaller classes, uniforms, and stricter discipline will be a plus.

I don't care about the race of her classmates. I do think that sending your kids to a school you have to pay for means you are going to get a group of kids whose parents take education very seriously. Which is a good start for a potential friend/peer group.

And if we don't like it, we can always go back to public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I'm a product of Catholic school (K - 12, nuns, uniforms), I'm very much not religious at all now. I'm moving my child to Catholic School this month (4th grade) because I don't feel my Title one FCPS is cutting it. I've told my child to be respectful, listen to the religious lessons, and make up her own mind about what she wants to believe in her heart.

The Catholic schools I've looked at teach the equivalent of FLE (sex ed) and that's an ongoing conversation I have with my kids anyway. I feel that the smaller classes, uniforms, and stricter discipline will be a plus.

I don't care about the race of her classmates. I do think that sending your kids to a school you have to pay for means you are going to get a group of kids whose parents take education very seriously. Which is a good start for a potential friend/peer group.

And if we don't like it, we can always go back to public.

I'm doing the same. I'm actually an atheist (former Catholic) sending my kids to Catholic HS. For a variety of academic reasons (safety as well, bad experience in public MS). They haven't been raised in religion at all, and the mandatory theology class has been tough. We explained to DS' teacher about his non-religious background and he was appreciative of that information. I told DS it's good to still learn it and understand where some people are coming from, their frame of reference. I am excited about when he finally gets to World Religions, I think that's a very important class.

Anyway, on a daily basis they do start classes with prayer, they do have mass about monthly. There's a good number of non-Catholics (30%) who are welcome to go up at Communion and receive a blessing instead of communion, so these kids feel included. The school priest is fantastic, perfect for young people.

They have had sex ed, which was abstinence-only, and like PP said that's a conversation DS and I have on a continuing basis and he knows my thoughts. Same with other Catholic Church beliefs that I don't agree with.

But the education and personal attention has been worth it to us.

[Anonymous]

It can depend on the school and the community. Some places, it's not a big deal; other places, you might feel excluded--either because of the religious issue per se or because most of the other families attend the same parish and have other connections.

No matter what, you have to be okay with overt religious instruction (the emphasis of which will also depend on the school) and required participation in Mass (my parochial school had weekly Mass for all the kids).

You really need to visit the school.

Also, don't assume that the Catholic school is better--some are great, some are mediocre, and some are mediocre *at best.* They might not have the facilities and resources that a public school has, the teachers might not have the same qualifications, etc. It's really dependent on the schools at issue.

[Anonymous]

Why would you want this?

[Anonymous]

DDs peers are religious. She is definitely exploring and becoming much more comfortable with the notion of religion. she has become a better person for it and we 100% support her choices.