Help with tween transport

[Anonymous]

My son is in Junior High and will not take the bus. He is scared of bullies and accidents by the driver. Is this OCD? He does not have any other ocd symptoms except for this. Should I force him. I feel like he is not being difficult about any other situation except for this. I think something happened but he won’t really tell me. Bus drivers change so much that I can not find out from them either. Thanks

[Anonymous]

It sounds like he has anxiety - whether it is just on this issue or more of an overall issue, you may want to discuss with his doctor.

[Anonymous]

I agree, it sounds much more like anxiety than OCD.

Have you asked him why he is concerned about those things? Has something happened that makes him think they are likely?

[Anonymous]

Had he been taking the bus before this?

[Anonymous]

I suspect that something happened on day or that he heard about something.

[Anonymous]

perhaps he was being bullied on the bus....

[Anonymous]

So, are you trying to find a way for him to get to school now?

[Anonymous]

We carpool and there are other kids that get dropped and don’t take bus. So it works out. But I think the bus is loud and there’s a lot of swearing that goes on. Anxiety yes. We are working on this but it’s difficult. I feel like it’s already ingrained in him

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We carpool and there are other kids that get dropped and don’t take bus. So it works out. But I think the bus is loud and there’s a lot of swearing that goes on. Anxiety yes. We are working on this but it’s difficult. I feel like it’s already ingrained in him

I had major anxiety as a kid about the bus. Like paralyzing anxiety. Nothing bad happened, I just imagined the worst. If you treat the anxiety overall, you may have some success with getting him to ride the bus. But if it works out either way, I wouldn't find it necessary to push it. I would however still seek treatment for anxiety. There is likely much more beneath the surface.

[Anonymous]

My kid has had trouble with bullies on the bus in the past, and there’s not much the school can do about it besides wag fingers. It can be chaos, and the driver can’t police the kids and drive.

He’s at an upper school now (jr & sr high together), and most kids just sleep on the morning bus, so AM is ok. But we drive in the afternoons both to avoid bullies and to get him home sooner than bus would (takes ages as we’re one of the last stops - sometimes late enough to interfere with sports). PM bus troubles are just not worth the hassle.