Which one of us is being unreasonable-When to give Christmas gift

[Anonymous]

I won’t say which one I am in the scenerio, because I want to see what others think.

We are a blended family. Both of us share children with exes. For Christmas, we decided to get the kids an Xbox. Due to scheduling, one of the kids won’t be here for Christmas, but with the other parent. One of us wants to make the one child wait to play with the Xbox until the other one gets back late the day after Christmas, because it’s a shared gift. The other wants to let the one child play with the Xbox on Christmas Day. It has caused a rift. Which one of us is being unreasonable? The gift isn’t a surprise. So, they are both expecting it.

[Anonymous]

Shared gift - both kids open at the same time. DO it early and then get each child their own individual game to open on Christmas. I wouldn't do it as a shared gift. I'd do it as a household item and get individual games for each child so they have something of their own.

[Anonymous]

Kid A gets to play with it that day. Kid B gets a turn as soon as they get home.

I will say that if there is some pre-existing tension between kid A and kid B, and kid B would consider this scenario as unfair which would serve to excacerbate said tension, I would consider amending my answer and having kid A wait.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I won’t say which one I am in the scenerio, because I want to see what others think.

We are a blended family. Both of us share children with exes. For Christmas, we decided to get the kids an Xbox. Due to scheduling, one of the kids won’t be here for Christmas, but with the other parent. One of us wants to make the one child wait to play with the Xbox until the other one gets back late the day after Christmas, because it’s a shared gift. The other wants to let the one child play with the Xbox on Christmas Day. It has caused a rift. Which one of us is being unreasonable? Ages 11 & 5.

[Anonymous]

Toss a coin.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I will admit the 5 yr old is more excited about his expected Pokémon toys and magnets. Not much conversation coming from him about the Xbox, as it is from the 11 yr old

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I will admit the 5 yr old is more excited about his expected Pokémon toys and magnets. Not much conversation coming from him about the Xbox, as it is from the 11 yr old

I'm going to assume it is your child who is older or living at the house and the other child is a there 50% or just every other weekend. You will make that child feel less equal if you allow the other child to open it and play with it. Have sufficient toys for each but only allow the one who will be there to open their stuff and anything shared needs to wait. Imagine what it is like not being there for the other child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Shared gift - both kids open at the same time. DO it early and then get each child their own individual game to open on Christmas. I wouldn't do it as a shared gift. I'd do it as a household item and get individual games for each child so they have something of their own.

I like this idea.

[Anonymous]

Both kids open at the same time.

[Anonymous]

celebrate Christmas early so they get it at the same time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:celebrate Christmas early so they get it at the same time.

Yes. Especially since it’s not a surprise.

[Anonymous]

Why would you give two children who share different custody parents the same gift? That's asking for a world of fights and trouble IMHO. Do better OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Shared gift - both kids open at the same time. DO it early and then get each child their own individual game to open on Christmas. I wouldn't do it as a shared gift. I'd do it as a household item and get individual games for each child so they have something of their own.

+1

[Anonymous]

Open together before Xmas or on Xmas eve. Whoever is home on Xmas should get to play with the Xmas gift ON Xmas. Not that kids fault the other one is gone. Plus it will get it out of that kids system so they’re not fighting over who gets to play with it first if they have to open it together. Let’s face it, the five year old isn’t really going to get much out there f it. Most games will be too hard and the controllers impossible to operate for a kid that age. They’re not going to play it together. All told it’s really a gift for the 11 yr old so let him have first crack at playing with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Shared gift - both kids open at the same time. DO it early and then get each child their own individual game to open on Christmas. I wouldn't do it as a shared gift. I'd do it as a household item and get individual games for each child so they have something of their own.

+1

+2