DS has the same symptoms as hubby (while he was small)

[Anonymous]

My hubby told me that he has focus problem & daydream all the time in classes while he was growing up. He didn't talk till 3 years old. He didn't know how to read till kindergarten because no one taught him at all. He says he still get A & B in classes because they were not difficult, and he felt that he just was different compared to kids the same age back then. No teachers or parents or others realize that he has problem struggling in school/daily lives, and he kept it all to himself, didn't tell anyone at all. He had problem making friends throughout his childhood, and he was more an introvert, nerdy or geeky guy growing up. He said that he think his focus problem get greatly improved while he was in college.

Currently, he is a professional engineer, really attention to details, has no focus problem, really talkative, no shy at all, can easily make friends. If he didn't tell me his childhood, I cannot tell at all that he had those struggling problems growing up. I am thinking could that my hubby had some undiagnosed developmental/delay/medical problem while he was small & growing up, and for somehow, as time passes, it get "improved/corrected/fix" over the time??

We have a 2 year old boy that has speech delay & cognitive delay. My inlaws are not concerned at all that he only speaks less than 10 words, and thinking that I am worrying/thinking too much. He is seeing developmental pediatrician & speech therapists through infant & toddler program. I have been trying to work hard to find ways to make him talk. My inlaws say that he is just a mini version of my hubby, and he will talk later & everything would be alright. I am a bit confused how come my hubby's condition got improved/corrected over the years without any medication or therapy? And, I keep wondering if DS (with the DNA play role factor), would be just like my hubby, will outgrow everything at the end?

[Anonymous]

Most kids don't know how to read until kindergarten.

[Anonymous]

OP here, my 2 year old also has focus and eye contact/pointing problem now. He is suspicious of ASD, but no diagnosis yet. I am also suspicious that my hubby was on ASD or Inattentive ADHD when he was small, and for some reason, without therapy/medication, all the symptoms have disappeared throughout the years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My hubby told me that he has focus problem & daydream all the time in classes while he was growing up. He didn't talk till 3 years old. He didn't know how to read till kindergarten because no one taught him at all. He says he still get A & B in classes because they were not difficult, and he felt that he just was different compared to kids the same age back then. No teachers or parents or others realize that he has problem struggling in school/daily lives, and he kept it all to himself, didn't tell anyone at all. He had problem making friends throughout his childhood, and he was more an introvert, nerdy or geeky guy growing up. He said that he think his focus problem get greatly improved while he was in college.

Currently, he is a professional engineer, really attention to details, has no focus problem, really talkative, no shy at all, can easily make friends. If he didn't tell me his childhood, I cannot tell at all that he had those struggling problems growing up. I am thinking could that my hubby had some undiagnosed developmental/delay/medical problem while he was small & growing up, and for somehow, as time passes, it get "improved/corrected/fix" over the time??

We have a 2 year old boy that has speech delay & cognitive delay. My inlaws are not concerned at all that he only speaks less than 10 words, and thinking that I am worrying/thinking too much. He is seeing developmental pediatrician & speech therapists through infant & toddler program. I have been trying to work hard to find ways to make him talk. My inlaws say that he is just a mini version of my hubby, and he will talk later & everything would be alright. I am a bit confused how come my hubby's condition got improved/corrected over the years without any medication or therapy? And, I keep wondering if DS (with the DNA play role factor), would be just like my hubby, will outgrow everything at the end?

Maybe they are right, and maybe they are not.

But we live in different times. Why don't you call your county's early intervention office and get an evaluation and see if your child is outside the norm.

And in the meantime this is a great book to read for ideas on how to encourage your child to talk more https://www.amazon.com/Takes-Two-Talk-Practical-Children/dp/0921145195

[Anonymous]

OP- I think you need to worry less about your husband, and focus on your child.

Yes some things are genetic, but this child has half of your DNA as well.

Educate yourself on developmental milestones, talk to your pediatrician and contact Early Intervention if you are concerned.

[Anonymous]

It's great that you are addressing the areas where your kid needs help. Keep doing that.

Your in laws don't understand because many times services weren't available when your husband was growing up. They are now, there's no reason not to use them.

Your kid might be just like your husband or he might have additional challenges. It's really too soon to tell. Keep doing what you're doing. Your in laws may never understand why, but don't worry about that. There story isn't yours.

[Anonymous]

Previous posters, OP has called child find, gets services, and sees a dev ped. Read before posting - it just isn't helpful to respond off the cuff.

[Anonymous]

You have good reason to be optimistic, given how your husband out grew his challenges but I think you're also doing the right thing working with Infants & Toddlers just in case. There is a lot of overreacting among parents in our generation and it's both good and bad. Good because we are catching things earlier and can intervene but bad because we are often unnecessarily stressing ourselves out.

A large percentage of people outgrow ADHD by their 20s so this isn't unusual.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my 2 year old also has focus and eye contact/pointing problem now. He is suspicious of ASD, but no diagnosis yet. I am also suspicious that my hubby was on ASD or Inattentive ADHD when he was small, and for some reason, without therapy/medication, all the symptoms have disappeared throughout the years.

You don't outgrow ASD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my 2 year old also has focus and eye contact/pointing problem now. He is suspicious of ASD, but no diagnosis yet. I am also suspicious that my hubby was on ASD or Inattentive ADHD when he was small, and for some reason, without therapy/medication, all the symptoms have disappeared throughout the years.

You don't outgrow ASD.

This, you can outgrow a language disorder or be successful in living with it and sometimes kid with language disorders have eye contact/pointing concerns especially if they have receptive issues. If they disappeared it is not ASD. Its very hard to tell with a two year old. Given the family concerns of language issues, I'd supplement with private speech.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my 2 year old also has focus and eye contact/pointing problem now. He is suspicious of ASD, but no diagnosis yet. I am also suspicious that my hubby was on ASD or Inattentive ADHD when he was small, and for some reason, without therapy/medication, all the symptoms have disappeared throughout the years.

You don't outgrow ASD.

You don't outgrow ADHD either.

Children may have one, the other, or both but it often depends on severity.

What's key is early intervention regardless of potential diagnosis down the road.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my 2 year old also has focus and eye contact/pointing problem now. He is suspicious of ASD, but no diagnosis yet. I am also suspicious that my hubby was on ASD or Inattentive ADHD when he was small, and for some reason, without therapy/medication, all the symptoms have disappeared throughout the years.

You don't outgrow ASD.

This, you can outgrow a language disorder or be successful in living with it and sometimes kid with language disorders have eye contact/pointing concerns especially if they have receptive issues. If they disappeared it is not ASD. Its very hard to tell with a two year old. Given the family concerns of language issues, I'd supplement with private speech.

You don't outgrow language disorders either. There are plenty of successful adults on the spectrum.

In terms of private speech, see how early intervention services go, op.

[Anonymous]

What are the specialists saying? All the other information about your husband is irrelevant. You need to stop listening to what your DH did and think only of your child. Nobody can predict if he will "outgrow" speech delay. Is he just not interested in talking? At two, I would look at the child as a whole. How was your DS's cognitive delay diagnosed? Who did it? Better to act early than to regret not helping later, and it seems like you are helping. Forget about your DH and his childhood, you are not raising your DH.

[Anonymous]

FWIW, my child's in-laws told me something similar and as DS gets older I do see him outgrowing issues like a speech delay all as they predicted. DH is a very social guy with BA from a prestigious college and a graduate degree from an Ivy with a successful career. It's hard to think of him as a kid who struggled in school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, my 2 year old also has focus and eye contact/pointing problem now. He is suspicious of ASD, but no diagnosis yet. I am also suspicious that my hubby was on ASD or Inattentive ADHD when he was small, and for some reason, without therapy/medication, all the symptoms have disappeared throughout the years.

You don't outgrow ASD.

This, you can outgrow a language disorder or be successful in living with it and sometimes kid with language disorders have eye contact/pointing concerns especially if they have receptive issues. If they disappeared it is not ASD. Its very hard to tell with a two year old. Given the family concerns of language issues, I'd supplement with private speech.

You don't outgrow language disorders either. There are plenty of successful adults on the spectrum.

In terms of private speech, see how early intervention services go, op.

Actually, I know of multiple children who outgrew a language disorder. Their receptive language simply came in at a different pace, sometimes not until after kindergarten.