Have to fire an employee and dreading it--vent/help/support

[Anonymous]

Someone who works for me has not been pulling her weight for the last year or so. And "not pulling her weight" is sugar coating things: she manufactures conflict/drama, does the bare minimum as far as work, misses deadlines more often than she makes them, and most significantly, the quality of her work (# of errors, client complaints, extent to which colleagues have to check/cover for her work) is turning into a joke. Suffice it to say that attempts to help her improve, provide constructive feedback, etc. have not gone well, and despite knowing that her job was on the line, she's made little meaningful attempt to improve. We're now at a point where she's got to go.

Logically, for all the reasons already noted, I know it's best for her to go, but I'm having a really tough time with it. Despite being a beastly co-worker/employee, socially she is very pleasant, someone I identify with in many ways and with whom I might be friends with if I didn't have the work context. I also know it's not going to be easy to find a comparable position in the current economy. HR tells me she's been given more than enough chances, and that she's created this situation for herself.

But, with all the economic doom and gloom in the papers, I can't get my head around the fact that for someone out there, I'm the ax-man. Ugh.

[Anonymous]

If it's your job to fire her, do it in a professional and respectful manner. You never know if you'll be in her shoes someday or she could be your boss down the line. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Firing people sucks, especially people you don't necessarily dislike, but you need to think of your coworkers and clients who are being negatively effected by this person's actions. Apparently, deep down, she is not happy and doesn't want to be there. Don't ever assume that just because you are closing this door on her, that something else won't open up for her.

You know it is the right thing to do, so do it.

[Anonymous]

Please bear in mind that she's the one who got herself fired, you didn't have much to do with this situation. As pps have stated, you are just the messenger and your job is to give her some dignity by keeping it brief, clear and avoiding turning the meeting into a 'debate'. As someone who has fired many people (and lived to tell about it) most employees know immediately that they are going to be fired, and they want to know the particulars, then get the hell out of there. Managers who over-explain the situation not only drag out the proceeding, but also may stumble into wording that isn't necessarily in the best interest of the company, or true (like "you are a great worker and we are sorry to lose you" when in actuality they are being terminated for being a terrible employee? crazy).

[Anonymous]

Short and quick. Don't give more information than you have to. Never again hire anyone remotely related to you. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

I had to fire someone once and I felt awful about it. I knew that his wife didn't work and they had two children at home. But he was and AWFUL employee and he was given more than enough chances. My company gave severance for terminations for performance, so he had a cushion for awhile. He ended up finding a job in a different state pretty quickly and he even kept in touch with me for awhile; that was awkward. Are you able to offer any severance?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Short and quick. Don't give more information than you have to. Never again hire anyone remotely related to you. Good luck.

Where did OP say anything about being related to her employee?

OP, hang in there. As long as the employee was treated fairly, you should feel okay with what you need to do. It could be worse: My brother works in the auto industry and has had to let go numerous good employees in the past year. It's crushing for him but scary, too. Even his boss was let go.

[Anonymous]

I've been part of the process on both sides. It's awful either way. I was fired from a job that I hated, where I fundamentally disagreed with the views and actions of the company but didn't have the guts just to quit. My boss didn't utilize my skills effectively and tried to convince me that I was stupid. At the end of the day, it was good that I left, but I wish I had just left and wasn't canned (it was a bad economy). It really just put me out of my misery.

Ironically, I go to another firm, where I was really successful and where I still am, and within two years of being there, I had to be part of a team that was firing a woman. Sounds a lot like your employee. All of her actions were pulling down the morale of the rest of the team. I stayed up at night thinking about this one, but at the end of the day, it was amazing how much better the entire office environment was after she was gone. What really helped my guilt was how miserable all of her team mates and colleagues around her were and how much better it was after she was gone.

Courage!

[Anonymous]

OP, just keep reminding yourself about how everyone else has had to make up for this employee and that this is not fair to them. You all are being grownups but the employee is not. Think of it as something you are doing on behalf of your co-workers more than you.

[Anonymous]

"This job is not the right fit for you, and we are asking you to move on. You have until [specific date -- two weeks perhaps]." If she wants examples, give her one or two. I agree with the poster who said do not tell her you are sorry to see her go. On the other hand, do not rob her of all self-esteem and confidence just when she has to look for another job by butchering her with tales of her every failure and problem on the job. It was simply a mismatch.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank so much for the helpful feedback. I am still dreading the discussion but good to be reminded that she's obviously not happy anyway, and leaving this job can be a catalyst for her finding something where she can actually be engaged...right? Ugh.

[Anonymous]

'Release her to her destiny' (as my former boss used to say).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Someone who works for me has not been pulling her weight for the last year or so. And "not pulling her weight" is sugar coating things: she manufactures conflict/drama, does the bare minimum as far as work, misses deadlines more often than she makes them, and most significantly, the quality of her work (# of errors, client complaints, extent to which colleagues have to check/cover for her work) is turning into a joke. Suffice it to say that attempts to help her improve, provide constructive feedback, etc. have not gone well, and despite knowing that her job was on the line, she's made little meaningful attempt to improve. We're now at a point where she's got to go.

Logically, for all the reasons already noted, I know it's best for her to go, but I'm having a really tough time with it. Despite being a beastly co-worker/employee, socially she is very pleasant, someone I identify with in many ways and with whom I might be friends with if I didn't have the work context. I also know it's not going to be easy to find a comparable position in the current economy. HR tells me she's been given more than enough chances, and that she's created this situation for herself.

But, with all the economic doom and gloom in the papers, I can't get my head around the fact that for someone out there, I'm the ax-man. Ugh.

Hopefully you work in my office and you're firing our bad egg. She's such a morale suck, terribly disorganized, inconsistent, and she under performs on all levels.

Find it within you to fire this person, quickly, for the sake of others. Trust me, you will be doing the right thing.

[Anonymous]

OP, I hear you. I had someone underperforming for a long time and I did back-flips to get her performing up to our standards, spending countless hours of professional development. There were times when I wanted to/ could have fired her, but she was about to get married, paying for the wedding herself, and really emotionally fragile after getting a couple of bad performance reviews.

Well, I just promoted someone else over her and she's been petulant, sulky, and downright insubordinate toward the person she now reports to. I've had to have that "I know you don't like my decisions, but if you can't live with them you need to be elsewhere, and until you are elsewhere, you need to respect the work environment" talk.

I hate being in that position and it's making life harder for the very deserving person who got the promotion. Plus I could have filled her job with someone better by now.

I regret not sucking it up and firing her, even though I thought I was doing the kind thing before.

[Anonymous]

Be quick and to the point but try and say something nice about her. It's all about letting people maintain their dignity. Some people want to hear the speech. Some people want to get out of the office as soon as possible. Try to do it at a time of day where there are few of her peers in the office. Either early in the morning, at lunch or at the end of the day. Ask her if she wants you to ship her stuff so she doesn't have to clean out her desk. Also, try not to do it on a Friday. At least if you get fired on a Wednesday you can get up and look for a job the next day. Good luck.