Lunchtime problem - what to do?

[Anonymous]

My second grade son has become very sensitive to gross things. Even the smallest of gross things, such as someone burping or someone else who has food on their face- minor stuff like that. Is gotten to the point that he is having trouble eating his lunch at school because of some of the things the other kids around him are doing or are eating or how they are eating. I have no idea where this is coming from. Several times this problem has made him feel nauseous or has made him gag at the school lunch table and he's gone to the nurse. Today a friend of his burped while he was eating his sandwich and my son actually threw up right then and there. The nurse called and I had to bring him home. I don't know what to do about this ongoing problem, and now he's dreading future lunches. Any thoughts on next steps to help him through this? I'm really at a loss.

[Anonymous]

I guess get him CBT from a child psychologist. He has to get over this. He can't control people and can't control where people eat. He could be walking through the mall at 2pm on a weekend and will see someone with food on their face eating a snack. He can't avoid this so he needs to get over it.

[Anonymous]

Beat it out of him.

Not really, obviously.

But when I'm stuck with a real problem that seem unusual, has the potential for getting worse and ingrained, and that is already affecting my kid detrimentally, I tend to panic. I can totally see how an earlier generation of parents could respond to their helplessness by yelling a lot or spanking.

Anyway, in these more enlightened times, I would first Google the hell out of it, potentially while on hold with the pediatrician's office to schedule a consult ASAP. I'd probably also talk to the school guidance counselor if there is one.

You need people who see a large volume of children and therefore might have seen this before and have some ideas!

[Anonymous]

Pack nut free lunches and he can sit at the peanut free table. Usually more spacious so he won't be up close to someone else's gross food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Pack nut free lunches and he can sit at the peanut free table. Usually more spacious so he won't be up close to someone else's gross food.

That's what I was thinking. Give him some space to outgrow this issue.

[Anonymous]

Cognitive behavioral therapy. Nip this in the bud.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cognitive behavioral therapy. Nip this in the bud.

It's kind of extreme, but i was thinking this too. Sounds like it might be some form of OCD exhibiting itself. Is he anxious about things also?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My second grade son has become very sensitive to gross things. Even the smallest of gross things, such as someone burping or someone else who has food on their face- minor stuff like that. Is gotten to the point that he is having trouble eating his lunch at school because of some of the things the other kids around him are doing or are eating or how they are eating. I have no idea where this is coming from. Several times this problem has made him feel nauseous or has made him gag at the school lunch table and he's gone to the nurse. Today a friend of his burped while he was eating his sandwich and my son actually threw up right then and there. The nurse called and I had to bring him home. I don't know what to do about this ongoing problem, and now he's dreading future lunches. Any thoughts on next steps to help him through this? I'm really at a loss.

Agree with the therapy. Someone with food on their face makes him gag? A burp made him throw up at the table? He's past "sensitive".

[Anonymous]

Op here. It's only when he's actively eating. These things don't bother him when he's not eating. Ugh. I'll start by talking to his ped.

[Anonymous]

I am guessing he is dealing with some kind of anxiety. My elementary kid's anxiety shows in the same way, through food issues, nausea, etc.

I would look into anxiety treatments, like grounding techniques. There are some effective ones out there that worked wonders for my kid.

I would not have him move tables because that might help the problem to grow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. It's only when he's actively eating. These things don't bother him when he's not eating. Ugh. I'll start by talking to his ped.

I'd also loop in the teacher and the school psychologist. The school psychologist can work with him to help him move past this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. It's only when he's actively eating. These things don't bother him when he's not eating. Ugh. I'll start by talking to his ped.

my son,now 12 was very similar. He still hates when people touch his food, make noises when they eat or are "dirty" but he has gotten past it on his own. I did not do anything other than talk to him about maybe finding another seat in the cafeteria.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am guessing he is dealing with some kind of anxiety. My elementary kid's anxiety shows in the same way, through food issues, nausea, etc.

I would look into anxiety treatments, like grounding techniques. There are some effective ones out there that worked wonders for my kid.

I would not have him move tables because that might help the problem to grow.

This. Well-meaning parents sometimes do this, but it can make the problem become more entrenched, because it communicates that there *is* something to be legitimately afraid of/disgusted by. An eval by a psychologist would be a better way to go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am guessing he is dealing with some kind of anxiety. My elementary kid's anxiety shows in the same way, through food issues, nausea, etc.

I would look into anxiety treatments, like grounding techniques. There are some effective ones out there that worked wonders for my kid.

I would not have him move tables because that might help the problem to grow.

This. Well-meaning parents sometimes do this, but it can make the problem become more entrenched, because it communicates that there *is* something to be legitimately afraid of/disgusted by. An eval by a psychologist would be a better way to go.

I'm not sure the janitorial staff would appreciate this line of thinking.

[Anonymous]

He needs therapy. The peanut free table won't cure this...my peanut allergic kid loves to fake burp and is not any cleaner of an eater than your average boy, which means not at all.

It is OK to need therapy but really, he will have a hard time if he can't deal with burps. My kids thrive on fart jokes and burp competition.