How to Make Good Decisions?

[Anonymous]

How do you make good decisions?

I am perpetually making poor choices. I don't realize I am after I'm on the other side.
Some examples:

-studying liberal arts even though family repeatedly told me to major in STEM or be a doctor.
-being petty and selfish with loved ones and driving them away.
-marrying the wrong man.

What can I do to make good decisions?

[Anonymous]

Listen to people who are wise, successful and make good decisions themselves. When they tell you to do something, ask "Why do you recommend that over this?"

Then you'll start understanding their thought pattern in making decisions.

[Anonymous]

Examine why you are making the decisions you are making. Did you go to school to spite your parent because you thought you knew better or did you do research and weigh the pros and cons and make an informed decision.
The list tells me you are a little impulsive. So try to combat that. Not every impulse is bad but many are. Make lists of pros and cons and spend longer evaluating decisions. Make plans and schedules (life, career, home, financial, even what to have for dinner) this will set you up to make proactive decisions and not reactive ones (when you're pushed agains a wall on something). First step is recognition. You have that so great. Now it's a lot of boring work.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you're just too damning of yourself, too self critical (except the husband bit - maybe you're too critical of him?)

[Anonymous]

Focus on your objectives - both long and short term.

Then be objective about how you can meet them.

E.g. short term objective: improve relationships. Focus on who and what you need to mend, consider that may begin and end with you, work on that. Maybe write a letter explaining why you were wrong, plus how and why you want to fix it. At a minimum, you'll make an improvement on your mindset and effort and figure out What Not To Do in relationships going forward.

E.g., long term objective: happy marriage. Determine what you want out of marriage. Determine if that's possible with current husband. Start working toward that or move on. Consider that the problem may be you - fix it or move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you make good decisions?

I am perpetually making poor choices. I don't realize I am after I'm on the other side.
Some examples:

-studying liberal arts even though family repeatedly told me to major in STEM or be a doctor.
-being petty and selfish with loved ones and driving them away.
-marrying the wrong man.

What can I do to make good decisions?

You need to learn to be wise, not intelligent. Read some philosophy books, read the Bible even if you are not Christian -- it will explain you the basic moral principle, and the consequences of the wrong choices, so you won't do them again.

[Anonymous]

I feel I must look at things differently. I'm a liberal arts major but I don't view it as a bad decision.

I do "agonize" over making decisions. I talk it out a lot and think about all possible scenarios.