Say something, do nothing, third option?

[Anonymous]

I recently started at a social service agency in the DMV. It's a spot I've wanted to work for a long time and I enjoy the substance of what I'm doing. The downside is that our small team is headed by someone who is very negative. I'm guessing she's probably burnt out from her work and may have been different when she started. I've been in the field for 10+ years so I'm not a freshly minted idealist, but I also don't think it's helpful to talk negatively about every single client or other service providers. Sure there are some bad apples, but not everyone is a f-ing idiot/bad/worthless etc. I already feel like this supervisor doesn't like me - I'm not sure she likes anyone but she does seem to have a few preferred people - so I don't feel like I can say anything to her. She's been there forever so I'm not sure how I would raise it with anyone else. I guess this is partly just a vent and also I'm wondering what people think about whether it's worth it to try to interject a different point of view in conversations. I really feel uncomfortable with some of what's being said so it feels wrong to just stand by. I'm also really invested in this job though so I guess that part of me is saying "keep your mouth shut." Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

That's super annoying, and I'm sorry you're stuck with a negative team leader! That said, I don't see ANY good coming from saying anything--it won't change your supervisor and it may affect your work environment, making it harder for you to do the work. Given that you're new, just stick to your principles by not badmouthing people the way she does. Your conscience should be clear as long as you behave in a way that YOU know is right. As I've been reminded many times in similar situations, the only person's behavior you can control is your own (especially when you're the newest). But I bet some of your colleagues will benefit from your positive attitude, as will your clients. Hang in there!

[Anonymous]

Keep your mouth shut. That's why I became a SAHM. Its pretty normal in social service environments. Lots of nasty and negative burnt out people who are all about their needs.

[Anonymous]

I recommend the book "Coping With Difficult People."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's super annoying, and I'm sorry you're stuck with a negative team leader! That said, I don't see ANY good coming from saying anything--it won't change your supervisor and it may affect your work environment, making it harder for you to do the work. Given that you're new, just stick to your principles by not badmouthing people the way she does. Your conscience should be clear as long as you behave in a way that YOU know is right. As I've been reminded many times in similar situations, the only person's behavior you can control is your own (especially when you're the newest). But I bet some of your colleagues will benefit from your positive attitude, as will your clients. Hang in there!

+1 Just conduct yourself in a different manner than your boss and always treat your clients and colleagues with dignity and respect, both in and out of their presence.