2 year age difference

[Anonymous]

Tell me your thoughts on a 2 year age difference. Dh and I are considering trying for another- wondering. About the pros and cons of a 2 year old and newborn... but also justwhether it's a good gap, too much, too little,etc. thanks!

[Anonymous]

Ours were three years apart. Having them in the same daycare and school was convenient for us, but at the daycare age tuition for two is steep. They are best friends. I think having a two year gap might have been even better for their bond but harder for us in the early years, and of course you face the same crunch in paying college tuition for both simulatenously.

[Anonymous]

Pp here: also our daycare had a tuition discount for two kids.

[Anonymous]

A two year age gap is fairly common OP- I wouldn't overthink it!

[Anonymous]

Mine are 25 months apart. Now almost 4 and almost 2. I love this spacing. They are so close and love to play together. The first summer with two is a bit of a blur, but now we have settled into a good groove. My sister and I have the same spacing, so it was what seemed natural to me. Thankfully, donor egg IVF worked twice and I got the spacing I wanted. It was definitely a deliberate choice.

[Anonymous]

Is your first born a boy or girl, OP?

[Anonymous]

Having a two year age gap is considered normal. Most wait until the oldest will be out of diapers or close to it. Mine are 16 months apart and it is still a bit hard. It is like having twins. They are both babies! I would have waited for a two year age gap if I had to do it again. Although everyone tells me how great it will be when mine turns 3 and 4.... yea right...

[Anonymous]

Ours are 2 years apart exactly. The first six months were brutal. Looking back now, I feel bad that my older kid was suddenly not a baby anymore. He seemed so much older than baby 2, but he was still really little himself. Now at 3.5 and 1.5, they are great friends. It definitely gets easier every day

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mine are 25 months apart. Now almost 4 and almost 2. I love this spacing. They are so close and love to play together. The first summer with two is a bit of a blur, but now we have settled into a good groove. My sister and I have the same spacing, so it was what seemed natural to me. Thankfully, donor egg IVF worked twice and I got the spacing I wanted. It was definitely a deliberate choice.

Glad to hear! My kids are 25 months apart and we are at the 2.5 and 6 months stage. I definitely still feel blurry!

[Anonymous]

Mine are 27 months apart and I like the spacing.
Pros: first kid was old enough when second kid was born--could talk/communicate well, almost potty trained, sleeping solidly, could play independently often, etc and yet young enough/close enough in age that we were still in baby mode and it was relatively easy to go back to having a baby again since we had just done it not too long before, as they get older they have similar interests, similar activities, at the same school, even share some friends, play together a lot
Cons: first kid kind of stops being babied maybe a tad sooner than they would otherwise (but maybe that's actually a good thing?), spread pretty thinly for first few months while both are young enough to be very demanding (but that might be true no matter the age difference depending on your first kids personality), you'll likely wind up wanting to buy a double stroller and may also want to buy a 2nd crib (of course neither of these is essential and plenty of kids w this age difference probably don't need them but we did), I at times felt guilty not getting enough one on one time w our first before second was born but I think I may have felt like that no matter what...

Overall this gap has been positive for us for sure.

Good luck!

[AmyForever]

Two year is a decent gap, there are other factors to consider as well like ages of you both

[Anonymous]

OP here Thanks for all of the responses! My first is a boy, and I'm 26 so we certainly could wait, but I'm inclined to want to get the baby phase over with. Like PP said, I think it would be hard to completely 'start over' if we got out of baby mode.

Thanks everyone!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ours are 2 years apart exactly. The first six months were brutal. Looking back now, I feel bad that my older kid was suddenly not a baby anymore. He seemed so much older than baby 2, but he was still really little himself. Now at 3.5 and 1.5, they are great friends. It definitely gets easier every day

This x1000! I added a third when my now middle was 4 and that age gap was dreamy from a parenting perspective (helpful that the older two could occupy each other at 4 and 6). The first year really was awful with a 2 year age gap, but now I'm reaping the rewards by having close boys who play constantly.