How do you all share mothers day?

[Anonymous]

It's my first mother's day and all I want is a day with my new little family. My MIL wants us to visit her (4 hours away) and my mom decided she's coming into town and staying with us.

Sigh. I really hadn't realized that mothers day was another holiday that both moms and I got to fight over yearly and that it had to be on a rotating schedule like Christmas, Thanksgiving and Easter. I just figured since we have no local family that it would be celebrated between me and my children, which was how it was when I was growing up.

How do you share mother's day? Rotate between which mom gets celebrated? Does DH just cook for all of us? I really want a day off from cooking and cleaning and planning.

[Anonymous]

Advice from an old married lady: make your husband take care of all the moms. Do not get into a cycle of doing all the work for your MIL/other moms. If grandmothers want to come, make them all feel welcome, but DH should do all the work. Do not take turns, like other holidays, going to see moms. This is your day, too, and your kids need to grow up seeing that. The only exception? You should pick out any gifts (by mail, of course) for the moms if your DH isn't a good shopper.

[Anonymous]

OMG, read the other 25 threads from woman complaining about not getting their "special day"

It is a day, it doesn't mean anything, give it to the biggest complainer, and if that isn't you, celebrate the fact that you aren't a brat.

[Anonymous]

I don't visit either on the day. I spend it with my child, at my home, alone.

If my husband chooses to visit his mom for part of the day, I don't discourage it, but I don't feel obligated to go, as she isn't my mother. And my child won't be going, because she's will stay with me on MD.

I visit my mom on Saturday.

[Anonymous]

Uh no, you do not need to share mother's day. And your mom doesn't get to decide she's coming for the weekend, that's something she needs permission from you for. Seriously.

My mom is coming for this mother's day (my first) but she ASKED if it would be ok if she came and I wanted her here since it's been almost two months since she and my dad have seen DD and they are super helpful when they're around. MIL is probably getting a phone call or a facetime from DH and we picked out a gift for her together. It is more than sufficient for each mother of the parents to just get a call on Mother's Day and not a visit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OMG, read the other 25 threads from woman complaining about not getting their "special day"

It is a day, it doesn't mean anything, give it to the biggest complainer, and if that isn't you, celebrate the fact that you aren't a brat.

So true!

[Anonymous]

OP here. I'm really not a brat, I swear. But I've been feeling like the little red hen this past year. I have hosted them after the birth, the baptism, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and now mothers day! No one helped me after I had the baby (other than DH). Is there some day that I get celebrated?!

My idea of mother's day is vastly different than theirs. We were going to go camping or do a picnic. My mom is going to want a fancy brunch downtown (which are probably booked already). And then MIL will be jealous we spent baby's first mother's day with my mom...

[Anonymous]

We are going to SIL and MIL will be there. Should be a nice day. Brunch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'm really not a brat, I swear. But I've been feeling like the little red hen this past year. I have hosted them after the birth, the baptism, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and now mothers day! No one helped me after I had the baby (other than DH). Is there some day that I get celebrated?!

My idea of mother's day is vastly different than theirs. We were going to go camping or do a picnic. My mom is going to want a fancy brunch downtown (which are probably booked already). And then MIL will be jealous we spent baby's first mother's day with my mom...

Husband takes baby to MILs. You and your mother go out (shame it isn't somewhere you want, but it is a meal out). Even better if husband & baby can leave sat and come home Sunday afternoon, you can relax & enjoy some quiet time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'm really not a brat, I swear. But I've been feeling like the little red hen this past year. I have hosted them after the birth, the baptism, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and now mothers day! No one helped me after I had the baby (other than DH). Is there some day that I get celebrated?!

My idea of mother's day is vastly different than theirs. We were going to go camping or do a picnic. My mom is going to want a fancy brunch downtown (which are probably booked already). And then MIL will be jealous we spent baby's first mother's day with my mom...

Husband takes baby to MILs. You and your mother go out (shame it isn't somewhere you want, but it is a meal out). Even better if husband & baby can leave sat and come home Sunday afternoon, you can relax & enjoy some quiet time.

Hell no! MIL goes to get to bogart the day AND take the baby on the mother's first Mother's Day too! Are you kidding?

Baby stays with its mother, and mother does whatever the heck she chooses. If she wants to spend the day without HER mother, she can. Nobody is saying her husband can't spend the day with HIS mom alone!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'm really not a brat, I swear. But I've been feeling like the little red hen this past year. I have hosted them after the birth, the baptism, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and now mothers day! No one helped me after I had the baby (other than DH). Is there some day that I get celebrated?!

My idea of mother's day is vastly different than theirs. We were going to go camping or do a picnic. My mom is going to want a fancy brunch downtown (which are probably booked already). And then MIL will be jealous we spent baby's first mother's day with my mom...

Husband takes baby to MILs. You and your mother go out (shame it isn't somewhere you want, but it is a meal out). Even better if husband & baby can leave sat and come home Sunday afternoon, you can relax & enjoy some quiet time.

OP here. No way. I don't want quiet time at all. I want to be with the baby and I don't want to go to brunch in a crowded restaurant. I would love more time with the baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'm really not a brat, I swear. But I've been feeling like the little red hen this past year. I have hosted them after the birth, the baptism, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and now mothers day! No one helped me after I had the baby (other than DH). Is there some day that I get celebrated?!

My idea of mother's day is vastly different than theirs. We were going to go camping or do a picnic. My mom is going to want a fancy brunch downtown (which are probably booked already). And then MIL will be jealous we spent baby's first mother's day with my mom...

Husband takes baby to MILs. You and your mother go out (shame it isn't somewhere you want, but it is a meal out). Even better if husband & baby can leave sat and come home Sunday afternoon, you can relax & enjoy some quiet time.

Hell no! MIL goes to get to bogart the day AND take the baby on the mother's first Mother's Day too! Are you kidding?

Baby stays with its mother, and mother does whatever the heck she chooses. If she wants to spend the day without HER mother, she can. Nobody is saying her husband can't spend the day with HIS mom alone!

*does not get to

[Anonymous]

It could be worse, I'm a divorced lesbian. I think for your first year as a mom, you should get to choose what you want to do, after that it will be a negotiation, and you should get what you want some of the time, but other times you suck it up and make another mom happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'm really not a brat, I swear. But I've been feeling like the little red hen this past year. I have hosted them after the birth, the baptism, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and now mothers day! No one helped me after I had the baby (other than DH). Is there some day that I get celebrated?!

My idea of mother's day is vastly different than theirs. We were going to go camping or do a picnic. My mom is going to want a fancy brunch downtown (which are probably booked already). And then MIL will be jealous we spent baby's first mother's day with my mom...

Husband takes baby to MILs. You and your mother go out (shame it isn't somewhere you want, but it is a meal out). Even better if husband & baby can leave sat and come home Sunday afternoon, you can relax & enjoy some quiet time.

Hell no! MIL goes to get to bogart the day AND take the baby on the mother's first Mother's Day too! Are you kidding?

Baby stays with its mother, and mother does whatever the heck she chooses. If she wants to spend the day without HER mother, she can. Nobody is saying her husband can't spend the day with HIS mom alone!

*does not get to

Then grow some balls & tell your mother you aren't going out to eat. Whining will get you no where, other than on DCUM complaining about your "special day"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It could be worse, I'm a divorced lesbian. I think for your first year as a mom, you should get to choose what you want to do, after that it will be a negotiation, and you should get what you want some of the time, but other times you suck it up and make another mom happy.

I think this is the hardest thing as a mom. All I do is make other people happy and there's never even one day that's all about making me happy.