Helping a dog separated from his "person".
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Anonymous
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This is something of a spin off of the "gentle labrador" post, which hit pretty close to home.
I'm a single mom with one daughter. 7 years ago, when my daughter was 10, we adopted the sweetest gentlest mixed breed mutt. He's probably 8 or 9 now, but very puppyish, full of energy, but also very eager to please. Seriously one of the sweetest easiest dogs in the world. Everyone who meets him loves him. Except me. I like him. I appreciate that he's kind of the perfect dog, but I'm not really a dog person. He's absolutely not my dog. He's my daughter's. He follows her everywhere, sleeps in her bed. Now that she's older, she does 100% of his care when she's home. Every meal, every walk (we live in an apartment, so there are lots of walks), takes him to the vet, buys his food, cuts his nails etc . . . In return he gives her lots of love, follows her from room to room. I work long days, and my daughter is something of a homebody, and he's been good company to her. This week is spring break, and my daughter has gone to visit her grandparents. This is the longest she's been gone, and the dog is breaking my heart. Every night he stands by her door, and when it's clear she's not there he goes and sits in his crate. He comes out when I invite him to sleep in my room, but you can see it's not he He'll survive a week, not a big deal, but my daughter's a junior. In a year she'll be gone for college, and he's not going. Any thoughts on how I can make that transition easier for him? Things I can do in the next year to strengthen our bond? How do you help a dog grieve? |
Anonymous
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You're very sweet to care about his emotional well-being. She should leave an unwashed t-shirt for him to sleep with.
And honestly, when you FaceTime with her, he'll hear her voice and be happy. So FaceTime or Skype with her from home where the dog can see/hear. |
Anonymous
| When she come back, he'll be overjoyed. Just be nice to him, extra walks maybe a trip to the park. Make him a special meal. If you don't mind, over the next year, you should try to take over some of his care just so that he is used to you doing it. When she goes to college, let him sit in on a skype call every once in a while. He'll miss her, but it will be OK. |
Anonymous
| He will bond more with you when she is gone. Dogs do this. |
Anonymous
| Facetime or skype |
Anonymous
Does this really work? This seriously never would have occurred to me. Wouldn't the dog be totally confused since it would smell like his person? -- OP |
Anonymous
| Lots of walks - distraction and wear him out. Plus it can probably help with depression just like it does in humans. |
Anonymous
Yes. Most dogs will recognize voices. |
Anonymous
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Welcome to having a dog, lol. They're the sweetest.
I don't think there's much you can do, he will get better after a couple weeks I think and just be super happy to see her  and maybe in a year or two she can take him with her.
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Anonymous
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Take him for a walk each day. Cook for him once/day - some boiled chicken with rice, half a hamburger (no onions!).
Talk to him. |
Anonymous
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If she's going away to college, maybe this is the perfect moment for you.
Have the dog sleep with you and when your DD comes back, don't have her sleep with the dog. You keep sleeping with the dog. Dogs (and people!) bond with those they snooze with. |
Anonymous
| Teach the pup a fun new trick. Training creates the best bond and it's both fun and rewarding! Enjoy it! |
Anonymous
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In our experience such absences [2 month stretches etc] don't affect the bond with their person. Sure the dog will be happy and fine with you but he will miss DD. DD's life now has comings and goings. For the trip away now get the dog something special [like stuffed bone] and cook for him.
Watch for waiting at times she normally came and went. Our dog has a super bond with 1 and partially another family member. Main man has been that since the moment they met at 8 weeks. |
Anonymous
| How do you feel about getting him a companion like a kitten or another dog? |
Anonymous
| Facetime/Skype never worked with my pets. |