Feeling helpless...ASD 4 yr old w/ behavioral issues

[Anonymous]

I am at my wit's end and looking for advice. I have a 4 yr old diagnosed with ASD when he was 2. He is currently in a contained class in the school system, but is now dropping to the ground when they try to get him on the bus to transport him to his daycare. The bus is refusing to wait, but they won't allow the teachers to pick him up and bring him onto the bus. I work full time, and have had to leave work early the past 2 weeks every other day (father has been doing the same), to go get him, but that situation is not sustainable. I'm not sure what to do. Any suggestions?

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry this is happening... This is a very tough age. Is your child verbal? Have you been able to talk with him?

Can the school do an FBA (Functional Behavioral Analysis)? If not, request that they do one. What school system are you in? In MCPS, the school can request that the Autism Unit come in for an observation to see what is going on, then provide guidance to the teachers to help try to correct the situation.

The school is trying to make this entirely your problem by calling you to get him on the bus. But, there is more they could be doing.

[Anonymous]

I agree with pp. You need to request an FBA. The school should be looking at ways to work on this behavior. I'm stunned that they are making you come to the school to deal with this behavior problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with pp. You need to request an FBA. The school should be looking at ways to work on this behavior. I'm stunned that they are making you come to the school to deal with this behavior problem.

+1. I don't know why they can't put him into the harness/car seat on the bus. The bus driver should also be allowed to wait. A run like that in the middle of the day is not super time sensitive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry this is happening... This is a very tough age. Is your child verbal? Have you been able to talk with him?

Can the school do an FBA (Functional Behavioral Analysis)? If not, request that they do one. What school system are you in? In MCPS, the school can request that the Autism Unit come in for an observation to see what is going on, then provide guidance to the teachers to help try to correct the situation.

The school is trying to make this entirely your problem by calling you to get him on the bus. But, there is more they could be doing.

OP here: He has an FBA for similar behavior, but it doesn't address the new behavior with the bus (only started a few weeks ago). They have never mentioned an Autism Unit, so I will definitely look into that. This is LCPS. Thanks for the info!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with pp. You need to request an FBA. The school should be looking at ways to work on this behavior. I'm stunned that they are making you come to the school to deal with this behavior problem.

+1. I don't know why they can't put him into the harness/car seat on the bus. The bus driver should also be allowed to wait. A run like that in the middle of the day is not super time sensitive.

OP Here: I spoke to transportation and they said that if he showed any resistance whatsoever boarding the bus (and that "resistance" would be defined by them), that they would refuse to take him. They also said the teachers were not allowed to pick him up and put him on the bus. It puts is in an extremely difficult situation. I looked up the statute for transporting disabled children, and it appears they are required by law to do so, so I feel like someone is shirking their responsibility here.

[Anonymous]

Not to mention they are probably making it worse by having you come. Does he still go to day care or do you take him home? I'm not judging because it is not your fault, but seeing you and/or getting to go home could be incredibly reinforcing to him! Of course he's going to keep doing it!

The school needs to step up and figure this out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with pp. You need to request an FBA. The school should be looking at ways to work on this behavior. I'm stunned that they are making you come to the school to deal with this behavior problem.

+1. I don't know why they can't put him into the harness/car seat on the bus. The bus driver should also be allowed to wait. A run like that in the middle of the day is not super time sensitive.

OP Here: I spoke to transportation and they said that if he showed any resistance whatsoever boarding the bus (and that "resistance" would be defined by them), that they would refuse to take him. They also said the teachers were not allowed to pick him up and put him on the bus. It puts is in an extremely difficult situation. I looked up the statute for transporting disabled children, and it appears they are required by law to do so, so I feel like someone is shirking their responsibility here.

Transportation often oversteps their bounds and makes up rules/regulations like this.

Ask them to put this in writing and to cite the regulations that state that resistance makes it impossible to transport your child, and that they can define resistance, and that teachers are not allowed to assist students onto the bus. None of this can possibly be the case.

Ask for an IEP meeting.

[Anonymous]

Is there an aid on the bus?

I agree with PPs to ask for an FBA. It's ridiculous for you to have to pick him up mid day.

Is he trying to avoid going to daycare or does he not want to ride a bus? If it's the later will the school send a car/van to pick him up? Fairfax uses the school designated mini-vans all the time.

[Anonymous]

OP, I don't have good advice but it definitely sounds as if you are not being well served or appropriately served by the district. This is why IDEA was created.

Please know other moms are here thinking of you and angry for you.

[Anonymous]

HI OP here again:

We actually just had an IEP meeting, and the teacher said the transportation issue needed to be a "side discussion" and would not discuss it in the meeting. I actually tried throughout the meeting to bring it up, and the team would not address it. There is an aide on the bus, but apparently that person isn't allowed to help before he gets on the bus...which makes no sense to me at all.

We don't know if it is an avoidance to go to the daycare or get on the bus, but we have even tried having the daycare provider come to the school to pick him up, and the school will not allow her to "help get him in her car". And yes, me being there to "save the day" is just reinforcing the problem in the wrong way, and making things worse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:HI OP here again:

We actually just had an IEP meeting, and the teacher said the transportation issue needed to be a "side discussion" and would not discuss it in the meeting. I actually tried throughout the meeting to bring it up, and the team would not address it. There is an aide on the bus, but apparently that person isn't allowed to help before he gets on the bus...which makes no sense to me at all.

We don't know if it is an avoidance to go to the daycare or get on the bus, but we have even tried having the daycare provider come to the school to pick him up, and the school will not allow her to "help get him in her car". And yes, me being there to "save the day" is just reinforcing the problem in the wrong way, and making things worse.

Call another meeting. Take a look at your IEP, it should include transportation (school to home) in the IEP. If it's in the IEP, and it's not being carried out, that's a violation of the IEP. AND IT GETS DISCUSSED.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:HI OP here again:

We actually just had an IEP meeting, and the teacher said the transportation issue needed to be a "side discussion" and would not discuss it in the meeting. I actually tried throughout the meeting to bring it up, and the team would not address it. There is an aide on the bus, but apparently that person isn't allowed to help before he gets on the bus...which makes no sense to me at all.

We don't know if it is an avoidance to go to the daycare or get on the bus, but we have even tried having the daycare provider come to the school to pick him up, and the school will not allow her to "help get him in her car". And yes, me being there to "save the day" is just reinforcing the problem in the wrong way, and making things worse.

Call another meeting. Take a look at your IEP, it should include transportation (school to home) in the IEP. If it's in the IEP, and it's not being carried out, that's a violation of the IEP. AND IT GETS DISCUSSED.

Agreed. This is insane.

[Anonymous]

Call the county and ask to speak to the special education coordinator and explain the problem. The school needs an incentive program to gain compliance and you need to reinforce him riding the bus with sanctions if he doesn't. See if he needs a high protein snack before the bus. Ask for him to transition to the bus with a new person from a new location to break the cycle. He needs something to look forward to on the bus, like a toy just for the ride that the aide holds for him.

[Anonymous]

Do you know what's happening on the bus? My daughter did this last year completely out of the blue and it turns out the aid was not very nice (yelling a lot as reported by two other students) and there was a boy on the bus who spit on her. Things got better, but she never got on the bus very happy.