social skills - group play and the 4.5 year old

[Anonymous]

Are there any social skills interventions that help with group free play for the 4-5 year olds? My 4 year old boy really enjoys playing 1:1 with certain friends outside of school, and enjoys organized games (eg steal the bacon) at school. But most of the time he refuses to play with groups of kids during free play time. Apparently he even turns them down if they ask if he wants to play. No ASD diagnosis but I'm sure that ASD approaches would be relevant. I'm not sure how much of this is an introverted personality, and how much is a lack of skills. I know that a big part of it could be inherited temperment, since I remember hating to play in groups when I was a kid unless it was an actual game with rules!

[Anonymous]

What diagnosis does your child have?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What diagnosis does your child have?

likely adhd. also motor planning/motor skills deficits that may make him more reluctant or overwhelmed by groups of kids. getting OT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are there any social skills interventions that help with group free play for the 4-5 year olds? My 4 year old boy really enjoys playing 1:1 with certain friends outside of school, and enjoys organized games (eg steal the bacon) at school. But most of the time he refuses to play with groups of kids during free play time. Apparently he even turns them down if they ask if he wants to play. No ASD diagnosis but I'm sure that ASD approaches would be relevant. I'm not sure how much of this is an introverted personality, and how much is a lack of skills. I know that a big part of it could be inherited temperment, since I remember hating to play in groups when I was a kid unless it was an actual game with rules!

If this is the question, spend the time and money on a assessment by a developmental pediatrician.

If he plays well one-on-one and participated in organized group games, what he chooses to do during free play wouldn't concern me unless he were unhappy. Since your kid doesn't seem upset or anxious, I would let him be about this.

I see a trend with moms in this area starting with OTs when they're concerned about their kids. OTS cannot diagnose motor planning issues or ADHD. Your kid on a typically developing trajectory--don't let an OT dictate a treatment plan in lieu of a formal assessment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are there any social skills interventions that help with group free play for the 4-5 year olds? My 4 year old boy really enjoys playing 1:1 with certain friends outside of school, and enjoys organized games (eg steal the bacon) at school. But most of the time he refuses to play with groups of kids during free play time. Apparently he even turns them down if they ask if he wants to play. No ASD diagnosis but I'm sure that ASD approaches would be relevant. I'm not sure how much of this is an introverted personality, and how much is a lack of skills. I know that a big part of it could be inherited temperment, since I remember hating to play in groups when I was a kid unless it was an actual game with rules!

If this is the question, spend the time and money on a assessment by a developmental pediatrician.

If he plays well one-on-one and participated in organized group games, what he chooses to do during free play wouldn't concern me unless he were unhappy. Since your kid doesn't seem upset or anxious, I would let him be about this.

I see a trend with moms in this area starting with OTs when they're concerned about their kids. OTS cannot diagnose motor planning issues or ADHD. Your kid on a typically developing trajectory--don't let an OT dictate a treatment plan in lieu of a formal assessment.

Who said the OT was dictating anything?? Geez. You assume a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are there any social skills interventions that help with group free play for the 4-5 year olds? My 4 year old boy really enjoys playing 1:1 with certain friends outside of school, and enjoys organized games (eg steal the bacon) at school. But most of the time he refuses to play with groups of kids during free play time. Apparently he even turns them down if they ask if he wants to play. No ASD diagnosis but I'm sure that ASD approaches would be relevant. I'm not sure how much of this is an introverted personality, and how much is a lack of skills. I know that a big part of it could be inherited temperment, since I remember hating to play in groups when I was a kid unless it was an actual game with rules!

If this is the question, spend the time and money on a assessment by a developmental pediatrician.

If he plays well one-on-one and participated in organized group games, what he chooses to do during free play wouldn't concern me unless he were unhappy. Since your kid doesn't seem upset or anxious, I would let him be about this.

I see a trend with moms in this area starting with OTs when they're concerned about their kids. OTS cannot diagnose motor planning issues or ADHD. Your kid on a typically developing trajectory--don't let an OT dictate a treatment plan in lieu of a formal assessment.

Who said the OT was dictating anything?? Geez. You assume a lot.

It was a warning not an assumption.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are there any social skills interventions that help with group free play for the 4-5 year olds? My 4 year old boy really enjoys playing 1:1 with certain friends outside of school, and enjoys organized games (eg steal the bacon) at school. But most of the time he refuses to play with groups of kids during free play time. Apparently he even turns them down if they ask if he wants to play. No ASD diagnosis but I'm sure that ASD approaches would be relevant. I'm not sure how much of this is an introverted personality, and how much is a lack of skills. I know that a big part of it could be inherited temperment, since I remember hating to play in groups when I was a kid unless it was an actual game with rules!

If this is the question, spend the time and money on a assessment by a developmental pediatrician.

If he plays well one-on-one and participated in organized group games, what he chooses to do during free play wouldn't concern me unless he were unhappy. Since your kid doesn't seem upset or anxious, I would let him be about this.

I see a trend with moms in this area starting with OTs when they're concerned about their kids. OTS cannot diagnose motor planning issues or ADHD. Your kid on a typically developing trajectory--don't let an OT dictate a treatment plan in lieu of a formal assessment.

This. OT is very trendy right now and you really should be seen by a developmental ped, especially with an ADHD or ASD concern. We did OT. I don't see how it helps with those issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are there any social skills interventions that help with group free play for the 4-5 year olds? My 4 year old boy really enjoys playing 1:1 with certain friends outside of school, and enjoys organized games (eg steal the bacon) at school. But most of the time he refuses to play with groups of kids during free play time. Apparently he even turns them down if they ask if he wants to play. No ASD diagnosis but I'm sure that ASD approaches would be relevant. I'm not sure how much of this is an introverted personality, and how much is a lack of skills. I know that a big part of it could be inherited temperment, since I remember hating to play in groups when I was a kid unless it was an actual game with rules!

If this is the question, spend the time and money on a assessment by a developmental pediatrician.

If he plays well one-on-one and participated in organized group games, what he chooses to do during free play wouldn't concern me unless he were unhappy. Since your kid doesn't seem upset or anxious, I would let him be about this.

I see a trend with moms in this area starting with OTs when they're concerned about their kids. OTS cannot diagnose motor planning issues or ADHD. Your kid on a typically developing trajectory--don't let an OT dictate a treatment plan in lieu of a formal assessment.

Who said the OT was dictating anything?? Geez. You assume a lot.

It was a warning not an assumption.

It was good and appropriate advice.

[Anonymous]

We did about 18 months of various social skills groups with my ASD child. He was about 4 years old when we started. I have to say that I don't think he was able to extend the skills beyond the clinical setting at that age.

He is now 7. His social skills are better, but I can't really say that it was because of the groups we did. I think he will basically always have more trouble than the average kid with connecting with others in a social setting.

I will say that the groups were a huge expense. We spent thousands of dollars; I'm not sure that it was money well spent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are there any social skills interventions that help with group free play for the 4-5 year olds? My 4 year old boy really enjoys playing 1:1 with certain friends outside of school, and enjoys organized games (eg steal the bacon) at school. But most of the time he refuses to play with groups of kids during free play time. Apparently he even turns them down if they ask if he wants to play. No ASD diagnosis but I'm sure that ASD approaches would be relevant. I'm not sure how much of this is an introverted personality, and how much is a lack of skills. I know that a big part of it could be inherited temperment, since I remember hating to play in groups when I was a kid unless it was an actual game with rules!

If this is the question, spend the time and money on a assessment by a developmental pediatrician.

If he plays well one-on-one and participated in organized group games, what he chooses to do during free play wouldn't concern me unless he were unhappy. Since your kid doesn't seem upset or anxious, I would let him be about this.

I see a trend with moms in this area starting with OTs when they're concerned about their kids. OTS cannot diagnose motor planning issues or ADHD. Your kid on a typically developing trajectory--don't let an OT dictate a treatment plan in lieu of a formal assessment.

Who said the OT was dictating anything?? Geez. You assume a lot.

yes but totally unhelpful, given that a) we are seeing an OT for a fine motor skill deficiency; b) have been through screeningd by infants and toddlers and neurologist and child psychologists and c) are on waiting lists for dev peds. The OT has been the most helpful of anyone so far btw.






It was a warning not an assumption.

It was good and appropriate advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are there any social skills interventions that help with group free play for the 4-5 year olds? My 4 year old boy really enjoys playing 1:1 with certain friends outside of school, and enjoys organized games (eg steal the bacon) at school. But most of the time he refuses to play with groups of kids during free play time. Apparently he even turns them down if they ask if he wants to play. No ASD diagnosis but I'm sure that ASD approaches would be relevant. I'm not sure how much of this is an introverted personality, and how much is a lack of skills. I know that a big part of it could be inherited temperment, since I remember hating to play in groups when I was a kid unless it was an actual game with rules!

If this is the question, spend the time and money on a assessment by a developmental pediatrician.

If he plays well one-on-one and participated in organized group games, what he chooses to do during free play wouldn't concern me unless he were unhappy. Since your kid doesn't seem upset or anxious, I would let him be about this.

I see a trend with moms in this area starting with OTs when they're concerned about their kids. OTS cannot diagnose motor planning issues or ADHD. Your kid on a typically developing trajectory--don't let an OT dictate a treatment plan in lieu of a formal assessment.

Who said the OT was dictating anything?? Geez. You assume a lot.

It was a warning not an assumption.

It was good and appropriate advice.

NP here - we started with OT at the recommendation of the developmental psychologist we contacted for an assessment (he did not do an assessment first). We've also been told repeatedly that our DC (5) is too young for a formal assessment. In all seriousness, how are moms with concerns who are new at this supposed to know where to start? What should I do first?

[Anonymous]

Separately, how do I find a social skills group? No diagnosis but there is a clear social skills issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Separately, how do I find a social skills group? No diagnosis but there is a clear social skills issue.

Our OT will set up playdates with other kids in her practice that she thinks are compatible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are there any social skills interventions that help with group free play for the 4-5 year olds? My 4 year old boy really enjoys playing 1:1 with certain friends outside of school, and enjoys organized games (eg steal the bacon) at school. But most of the time he refuses to play with groups of kids during free play time. Apparently he even turns them down if they ask if he wants to play. No ASD diagnosis but I'm sure that ASD approaches would be relevant. I'm not sure how much of this is an introverted personality, and how much is a lack of skills. I know that a big part of it could be inherited temperment, since I remember hating to play in groups when I was a kid unless it was an actual game with rules!

If this is the question, spend the time and money on a assessment by a developmental pediatrician.

If he plays well one-on-one and participated in organized group games, what he chooses to do during free play wouldn't concern me unless he were unhappy. Since your kid doesn't seem upset or anxious, I would let him be about this.

I see a trend with moms in this area starting with OTs when they're concerned about their kids. OTS cannot diagnose motor planning issues or ADHD. Your kid on a typically developing trajectory--don't let an OT dictate a treatment plan in lieu of a formal assessment.

Who said the OT was dictating anything?? Geez. You assume a lot.

It was a warning not an assumption.

It was good and appropriate advice.

NP here - we started with OT at the recommendation of the developmental psychologist we contacted for an assessment (he did not do an assessment first). We've also been told repeatedly that our DC (5) is too young for a formal assessment. In all seriousness, how are moms with concerns who are new at this supposed to know where to start? What should I do first?

The developmental psychologist was probably referring to an educational evaluation. You can see a developmental pediatrician at any age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Separately, how do I find a social skills group? No diagnosis but there is a clear social skills issue.

There aren't a lot of social skill groups geared for young children. Ivymount Outreach offers a few, specific social skill classes. There are also summer camps that deal with OT or S/L issues and will have a social skills curriculum component. From time to time, OTs or SLPs offer social skill groups.