I need some stories about behavior getting better today.

Anonymous
I know the plural of anecdotes isn't data, I know. But I need some stories of behavioral issues improving. My son is 5. He has significant ADHD. He has had major behavioral issues since he was 2. He requires constant vigilance. Into everything. No attention span. Highly highly impulsive. Grabs stuff, may push or hit his sister at any given moment. Very low frustration tolerance. Does not have melt downs but ignores and avoids almost all basic requests. Is sweet and loving and can be kind but clearly doesn't have a ton of control over this. Difficult to take out the house including to the park because may elope, may bug small kids, grab things, cause disruption. May spit randomly at People.

Has had delays. Still has major fine motor delay. Is in Pep and they claim it's going well. Going to do a full neuropsych at 6 but we've ruled out ASD with ados with a Dev ped and his speech recently tested in solid average range.

That's the backstory. For the behavior we've tried aba and ot. We've been trying a medication these past couple of weeks and it seems to give a tiny bit of relief. And then there's a major rebound. I am despondent that medication isn't going to work and that nothing is going to work. I'm so frustrated with him and often he just doesn't seem to get it. He doesn't get why everyone is always so frustrated with him.
Anonymous
Honestly, it can get very worse. Sorry. If I could choose, I'd rather it be autism. Mood disorders are much more challenging to treat.
Anonymous
Okay, it sounds like you are trying your first medication. It's not really working. That means there are others to try. Right? It doesn't mean that medication isn't going to work.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Okay, it sounds like you are trying your first medication. It's not really working. That means there are others to try. Right? It doesn't mean that medication isn't going to work.


I think that's true. But the process of figuring out the medication is so complicated and I can't get anyone to call me back ever. And I just want it to work really badly I think.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it can get very worse. Sorry. If I could choose, I'd rather it be autism. Mood disorders are much more challenging to treat.


How do I know if he has a mood disorder at 5?
Anonymous
Hang in there - you sound like a good, caring parent and are doing all the right things. Keep at it, you will get there.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it can get very worse. Sorry. If I could choose, I'd rather it be autism. Mood disorders are much more challenging to treat.


How do I know if he has a mood disorder at 5?


In our experience, a lot of things look alike at five, even to $$$$ professionals. I have a child who was very similar to yours at the same age, and now at 10 the tentative diagnoses are HFA and OCD/anxiety. We were told definitely "no autism" by several pros during g the preschool years. Sometimes they just don't know.
Anonymous
My child was similar but also had meltdowns. Now at 9, things are better. He's never going to be an easy child and we are always going to need to deal with meds (at least as far as I can tell), but I am no longer scared to just go out. I've also developed a much thicker skin and don't get as embarrassed in front of others. I know more of his triggers and just don't do as much. Birthday party at a place we often hate- just say no. Invitation to a crowded place- we are busy. We keep things short and to a schedule. He's happier, I'm happier. Hang in there, kindergarten was really rough but things have slowly improved.
Anonymous
Op here - I honestly think he does not have melt downs because he can't pay attention that long.
Anonymous
It will get better, OP! This is probably the most difficult age because you've been at this for years and are totally exhausted. They are big enough that you can't grab them as easily if they are getting themselves into trouble, but not yet mature enough to have any sense of how to control their actions. Things started improving for our DS and several of his friends with the same issues at age 6. By 7 things had improved so much we could mostly leave him alone to play around the house and yard. By 8 he'd walk out the door to hang out with friends down the street for an hour or two and we didn't worry.
He has always been mainstreamed and K was difficult but things improved strikingly in 1st and got even better in 2nd and 3rd. Keep your chin up, OP. You're doing great.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it can get very worse. Sorry. If I could choose, I'd rather it be autism. Mood disorders are much more challenging to treat.


How do I know if he has a mood disorder at 5?


In our experience, a lot of things look alike at five, even to $$$$ professionals. I have a child who was very similar to yours at the same age, and now at 10 the tentative diagnoses are HFA and OCD/anxiety. We were told definitely "no autism" by several pros during g the preschool years. Sometimes they just don't know.


I agree with this. We have severe ADHD, OCD, and anxiety. To the untrained eye, our kid will look very similar to a child with autism and requires similar accommodations to a kid with autism at school. Medication is trial, error, trial, error. The older a child gets, usually the more clear it becomes.

OP, I would suggest supplementing with behavioral or ABA.
Anonymous
What drug are you trying? Is it a starter dose?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Okay, it sounds like you are trying your first medication. It's not really working. That means there are others to try. Right? It doesn't mean that medication isn't going to work.


I think that's true. But the process of figuring out the medication is so complicated and I can't get anyone to call me back ever. And I just want it to work really badly I think.


What kind of a practice are you using a med mgmt? We use a psychiatrist and when we change meds we do monthly appts. There's no phone time. Why would you need to call?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Op here - I honestly think he does not have melt downs because he can't pay attention that long.

Ok OP when you said this I related. My DD was a lot like your son and it can get better. I was terrified to take her out of the house because she was out of control (safety issue) all the time. We found the right meds at 6, after a lot of trial and error. She is almost 13 now and a delightful child. No behavior issues, funny, charming even, and a good student. She had lots of OT, speech and I had personal therapy and we all healed. It can get much better. Take care of yourself, however you need to.
Anonymous
What med are you trying?

We started with Intuniv, then Risperdal (terrible-avoid unless absolutely necessary), then did a stretch with abilify and Prozac, and now he is on Zoloft. We didn't have the complications of ADHD but did have a similar impulsivity/low frustration tolerance/aggression.

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