How did switching from a nanny to daycare go?

[Anonymous]

I have an amazing nanny, and a DD going to kindergarten next year and another DD, 2. Thinking about going with work daycare for my younger DD, alternative would be preschool and keeping the nanny. I am scared to switch, most because I am worried about managing all of the complexities of aftercare and school holidays and summer and camp and also because older DD is super high strung and I am worried she may have difficulties with kindergarten and daycare after half day preschool. By the time I pay for aftercare, daycare, summer care, the cost differential is there, but it's like $5-10k, not even close to the cost of care for both, but still significant. And we have a truly awesome, reliable A+ nanny, which is hard to give up., not to mention the consistency of a single caregiver vs a diffuse network. If she was mediocre this decision would be easier. DH and I also travel a bit so having a nanny is great for the flexibility, but we only use it maybe 3-4 times a year and while we don't have family, do have a network of sitters we could probably call.

I'm wondering if others have been faced with this decision, and how it went to switch to daycare. Are you happy you made the decision? Did you go with a part time nanny? Any advice?

Thank you so much. I'm totally overthinking this and need to decide before we lose our opportunity to sign up for daycare.

The money difference is significant for us of course, although we could still save enough and life fine either way. It would be more savings and probably nicer vacations we'd give up.

[Anonymous]

Bump

[Anonymous]

It seems like the nanny is easier in every respect. And since the money is not a major factor id go with trusted provider.

[Anonymous]

PT nannies can be tough to find, and they often leave as soon as they can leverage their position with you into a FT job. That makes sense, since life here is expensive, but it can leave you in the lurch.

In your case, I would keep the nanny until the youngest goes to kindergarten. It seems that's what most people do.

[Anonymous]

We switched from nanny to daycare when DC #1 was 20 months and DC#2 was born. For our family, it was a great decision even though I thought our nanny was very good.

For older DC, daycare/preschool was perfect for socializing and he loved all of the different activities. The hard adjustment was napping, as DC was always a bad napper, and now he was on a schedule. He has really blossomed socially, and I love all of the different topics, activities, and books they cover in daycare/preschool.

For us, switching to daycare was absolutely the right decision, and we also put DC#2 in daycare.

[Anonymous]

Switching to daycare was the right decision for us (we switched when DD1 was 20 months, which was an AWFUL time to do it, btw)... and we have had DD2 in daycare from the beginning.

But honestly? It sounds like having a nanny is perfect for your family. If you can afford it, don't mess with a good thing.

[Anonymous]

If you are worried about socializing you could always have the nanny take them to library days or other activities. Or you could sign up with a pre-school for half days and couple of days a week to make a transition to full-day pre-school or kindergarten easier.

[Anonymous]

We are about to make this change, in 3 weeks. Our oldest was always in daycare and then we got a nanny for our second child. I'm worried about things like hectic mornings and sick days. But I survived the first time. I'm making the change because my youngest is extremely extroverted and he needs more than a few hours per day with other kids. For your situation, I wonder why you're giving up the nanny. Can't you just put your kids in toy time or some low cost activity thru the dept of recreation? We don't need flexibility, and it sounds like you do.

[Anonymous]

OP, I am in your exact situation except a year ahead of you - kid in 1st and a 3 year old. I have an A nanny who has slowly dissolved into about a B nanny. But it's hard to give it up, just for the logistical advantages. We are pulling the plug and going to full-time preschool for my younger son. He would have moved up to 3x a week preschool next year and it's just too much to pay for that plus the nanny. We can also afford it, but I just couldn't justify it. I also think my younger child is ready to go full day somewhere. He's very extroverted and loves school.

I think your concerns about aftercare for a new K are valid. It can be an exhausting day for them in K and those aftercare situations can be chaotic. If I was you, I'd get another year out of the nanny and then make the move.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I was going to add the same thing: keep the nanny for one more year, the Kind. year is a big adjustment, and if your child is sensitive it might be a harder one. Mostly it's that they are very tired with the transition - they get home and are a mess. So if you don't need to do aftercare that first year, don't do it.

Then you'll be able to better see what the school schedule is, how many days off (so many!) and get your temperature and stress level for handling those without a nanny at home who can care for your oldest when school is closed, delayed, etc.

Your youngest is going to preschool nearby, so that handles the socialization/play with others.

[Anonymous]

I was going to say give it one more year too. Your 2 year old will be 3 and your older one will be adjusted to full day school.

[Anonymous]

For two parents who travel, having a loving nanny is the stability your children need, IMHO. Let them have this connection if you can. Yes, daycare is cheaper. And they may become socialized more quickly. But that WILL happen in school, no matter what. Having a 3rd adult in your child's life that can be counted on no matter what, IMO, is priceless. Let them have this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Switching to daycare was the right decision for us (we switched when DD1 was 20 months, which was an AWFUL time to do it, btw)... and we have had DD2 in daycare from the beginning.

But honestly? It sounds like having a nanny is perfect for your family. If you can afford it, don't mess with a good thing.

Why was 20 months an awful time to make the switch? I'm looking to make the switch when my LO is 18months. Hoping the time is right.

[Anonymous]

Not poster, but many kids experience more separation anxiety around 18-24 months. We went from easy daycare drop offs, to sobbing/clinging etc. etc. But it is a phase and they do outgrow it. The key is to get in, give you hugs and get out so the child can adjust. Hanging out only delays the inevitable and leaves them in a weird limbo state that intensifies their emotions.

[Anonymous]

Unless you want them to have a specific type of education - like Montessori or Waldorf - I'd stick with the nanny. If you have an intense job that requires flexible care for your child the nanny is the way to go.

However, if you want DD to have more socialization you could consider finding a pre-school that has mornings, 2-days a week or so and have the nanny do drop off and pick up.