Most Hated Coworker

[Anonymous]

I've recently realised that I'm the most hated co-worker in our office. We are a satellite office and I highlighted some issues around my being marginalized to central management. I am good at my job. The result has been very positive for my career. I'm getting better access to clients, great technical training and visibility to management.
However the head of the local office and other people dislike and mistrust me.

What can I do to remedy the situation?

[Anonymous]

Keep your mouth shut. You don't highlight issues as they know and don't care. find a new job.

[Anonymous]

How did you realize you were being marginalized?
Why do you think this is happening?

[Anonymous]

I'm confused about your post. So you were marginalized, tattled to management, then got better job assignments and now everyone hates you?

[Anonymous]

Were you also that girl in high school who believed she was too pretty to have friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm confused about your post. So you were marginalized, tattled to management, then got better job assignments and now everyone hates you?

Yes exactly. I was being marginalized by the local supervisor. I tattled to management (who sit in another city) and they came and implemented some changes. Now most of the local people impacted by the changes dislike. But it's been very positive for me as my role has been expanded and I'm doing more interesting work.

I love my job but feel like vomiting when I think of the people I work with.

[Anonymous]

If you feel like vomiting when you think about your co-workers, you need to leave your job.

If you know why they "hate" you, and you want to stay, you can work on that. We don't know why they hate you, so it's hard to advise. I have had some co-workers where it was just a personality conflict or someone easily offended, and others where they would have had problems no matter where they worked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm confused about your post. So you were marginalized, tattled to management, then got better job assignments and now everyone hates you?

Yes exactly. I was being marginalized by the local supervisor. I tattled to management (who sit in another city) and they came and implemented some changes. Now most of the local people impacted by the changes dislike. But it's been very positive for me as my role has been expanded and I'm doing more interesting work.

I love my job but feel like vomiting when I think of the people I work with.

Well, nobody likes a rat.

I'd look for a new job because you probably have a target on your back right now. And you seem super selfish.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like they've disliked you for a long time. Did you think "tattling" would make things better? Why do you think you were marginalized in the first place?

[Anonymous]

Here's my take on this situation. Everyone in your office feels marginalized in the same way you felt. Everyone more or less felt those were the facts of life and that there was a level playing field and you were all in hell together. But you went to Big Management and made out that somehow your life was rougher in some special way and they took you very, very, seriously (probably out of fear of litigation) and now you have special treatment.

This recently happened in my office. A colleague filed an absurd claim of anti-Episcopalian discrimination based on not getting enough of this, that, and the other thing (which none of us got) and doesn't understand why no one takes him seriously anymore.

[Anonymous]

A few thoughts:
-Of course your local coworkers dislike you more than ever now. You were all in it together and now you're not. They're jealous.
-Higher management probably knew, on some level, about the lot you all were in. They may not have had all the details, but if they had wanted to investigate prior to your complaints, they could have and they chose not to. This willful ignorance on their part is weak management.
-If this is a chance for you to grow professionally, take it, enjoy it, but don't expect to make friends locally. In six months, assess whether there's an opportunity to move to HQ or whether you can position yourself well for an external transition.

Good luck! In dysfunctional settings, being the only person who's treated well does put a target on your back, but that doesn't make you deserving of that target. This is how bad management keeps the focus off them - by pitting you all against each other.

[Anonymous]

Why were you originally marginalized? Was it the way things were structured (ex. reporting hierarchy, or procedure for pitching clients) or were people doing things that pushed you to the side (ex. not including you in important meetings, or misrepresenting your contributions to a work product)?

[Anonymous]

Are you the tall poppy poster, by chance?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here's my take on this situation. Everyone in your office feels marginalized in the same way you felt. Everyone more or less felt those were the facts of life and that there was a level playing field and you were all in hell together. But you went to Big Management and made out that somehow your life was rougher in some special way and they took you very, very, seriously (probably out of fear of litigation) and now you have special treatment.

This recently happened in my office. A colleague filed an absurd claim of anti-Episcopalian discrimination based on not getting enough of this, that, and the other thing (which none of us got) and doesn't understand why no one takes him seriously anymore.

LOL!

[Anonymous]

The way I was marginalized was through people misrepresenting my efforts (management looked at the data - hours worked and deals booked -to verify that I was indeed doing the work)
I was also excluded from important client meetings and other people were pitching my products.

I decided to be non-apologetic and simply said there was no way I could have kept quiet about what was going on. They still hate me but are definitely treating me with more respect