Karate why'd

[Anonymous]

DS is 7 and has been taking a karate class for one hour once a week for about a year. He is still a white belt. He always has the same teacher, who says DS has a good technique but is not a good listener, so while all the other kids are getting promoted, DS is not. The belt tests only happen a few times a year. DS loves karate but is getting a little despondent that he will never advance. He has ADHD and the class requires a lot of sitting around and standing around while the teacher is either lecturing about self-control or has the children stand in line so he can assess their technique individually. DS gets in trouble when he is required to sit or stand for a while waiting for his turn to come. The class is definitely not a good match for him, but he loves karate and feels that he already invested much time into it. I personally want to take him out because this punitive policy of withholding belt exams is not working, but DS wants to keep going. I wanted to talk to the teacher about just letting him take the belt exam at least once this year, but DH feels that we should not "rescue" him. Wwyd?

[Anonymous]

Pick a different studio. People mock " belt factories" but that technique is good when they are little and need to stay motivated. That teacher seems rigid too.

[Anonymous]

Can you talk to the instructor? I was a martial arts instructor for about ten years. It seems odd that he wouldn't allow a white belt to test assuming he has been consistently coming to class. Typically a white belt is ready to advance to yellow in about three months. It's less about technique and knowledge and more about keeping kids (and adults) motivated, especially when they are just beginning.

[Anonymous]

He has been coming to every class but during the times when he has to stand in line (and the line is long) he will inevitably fail and start horsing around. I will talk to the teacher and see if he can test at least for the next test.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He has been coming to every class but during the times when he has to stand in line (and the line is long) he will inevitably fail and start horsing around. I will talk to the teacher and see if he can test at least for the next test.

I would tell the instructor that you feel like your son is getting discouraged. If he doesn't already know your son as ADHD, please tell him. In a good school, the instructor will want your son to gain confidence and stay motivated and will work with you to help him succeed. Most importantly because a good instructor knows how life-changing martial arts practice can be. But also because your monthly payments keep the lights on.

[Anonymous]

OP, don't question the instructor because you are then challenging his integrity. He obviously doesn't think your son has met the requirements to move to the next level and that is fine because it is his studio. You need to either move to a different studio - a belt factory like someone mentioned - or stick it out with the understanding that this instructor has a very high level of expectation.

My kids do TKD and we did not want a belt factory school. They go twice a week since September and DD is just having her first belt test. DS has not had one yet. Sometimes I don't agree with the instructor, but it is his studio and I wouldn't dream of questioning his methods. My kids are not entitled to a belt simply because they have been in the class 5 months.

[Anonymous]

Once a week isn't enough for him to learn skills that are hard for him. Standing quietly is a hard skill and he's still learning.

Find a different school. We go to a TKD school that does an excellent job of teaching skills like self control and patience through exercises and practice, not just lecturing. My very wiggly, high energy boy has really learned a lot of self control in a year.

[Anonymous]

Several thoughts

1. Why would you want a child to advance if he's not ready? Would you want him advancing in swimming because he attended every week even if he cannot swim? Most people prefer places that only advanced those who have mastered the level over those who advance kids who show up everyday for X amount of time.

2. If you are unhappy, try another studio that hands out belts based on how often your child goes

3. Try a different martial art. He sounds like a kid who would be better served by jiu jitsu or an art that has more grappling.

[Anonymous]

Switch him to Juijitsu.

[Anonymous]

Maybe it would be helpful to OP to list some places that people think are or are not belt factories. Op, where are you located? I see benefits of both depending on what you are looking for in a program and what you need for your child.

[Anonymous]

My ADHD child does TKD and just started at age 11. He is older than many of the kids with higher belts. However, his age helps him stay focused compared to the younger kids and he is progressing well. The teachers are really good with the younger kids. His class is pretty active and there is not much time to horse around. I would look into a different studio since I'm sure they vary.

[Anonymous]

Is he among the younger kids in the class? If he likes it, go with privates for a few time. Do not worry about him progressing with belts, I bet you his ADHD makes him better than the rest of the kids once they get older. Talking a lot was boring for both my kids in any sport's activity at 7, still is as teens.

[Anonymous]

11:08 again. How much time is spent sitting or standing? My children do taekwondo and respect and listening are a large part of the program but they do not have to spend the majority of the class listening to a lecture. My son especially has thrived with their strict structure and expectations. He frequently has trouble listening and sitting in school but never at twd. Maybe you should visit other karate programs to observe and compare. I hope you can find a better fit since your son loves it. I agree with your DH about not rescuing him and asking for a belt test if they think he isn't ready. Maybe this place isn't a good fit for your child.

[Anonymous]

Op here. This is not an actual studio. They come to our school's aftercare. So this an after school run activity. He is in 2 other sports where he really thrives however he actually loves karate (he does not love the other two sports). The instructor is the only person who ever comes to teach at our school and I have a feeling that he has not been doing it for a long time. There is a lot of time spent on talking.

[Anonymous]

You can't ask the instructor to change his ways just for your child. That's not how something like this works. Maybe pull your kid from this after school club and find a better place for him.