Parent-free Play date?

[Anonymous]

My DD has a few really good friends in school. I've met the parents, and we've all attended parties of other children in DDs class, however we've never been to each others homes.

When do parent-free play dates become a thing? How do I initiate this? My DD and friends are 6 and in K.

[Anonymous]

Do you mean one kid gets dropped off at the others home? Just invite the child over and say "drop off at 2".

We did this in preschool (after parents and kids were comfortable). Then in K, it reverted back for awhile as it was all new people. Then once everyone was comfortable, drop offs began again. I found most parents to want to drop off.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand.

[Anonymous]

For us, it seemed to start in K, although I think it sort of depends on your interaction with the parents up to the play date. For instance, pretty much all of the drop off play dates my first grader has been to, we've met the parents several times at birthday parties, school events, drop off / pick up, etc., so it's not like they were complete strangers.

That said, it's not a universal switch, and will vary kid-to-kid, or parent-to-parent. DS has one friend whose parents we know very well, and who (kid and parents) have been to our house several times, but still aren't comfortable with drop-off play dates (parents say the kid isn't comfortable, but it might be they aren't and just don't want to offend or something).

For us, when DS was in K, I would email or text the parent and in the invite say "we're happy to do a drop off play date or you're welcome to stay; whatever you and [kid] are comfortable with." Most did drop off, a few would hang for a bit to make sure their kid was comfortable. Other than the kid above, no one else stayed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For us, it seemed to start in K, although I think it sort of depends on your interaction with the parents up to the play date. For instance, pretty much all of the drop off play dates my first grader has been to, we've met the parents several times at birthday parties, school events, drop off / pick up, etc., so it's not like they were complete strangers.

That said, it's not a universal switch, and will vary kid-to-kid, or parent-to-parent. DS has one friend whose parents we know very well, and who (kid and parents) have been to our house several times, but still aren't comfortable with drop-off play dates (parents say the kid isn't comfortable, but it might be they aren't and just don't want to offend or something).

For us, when DS was in K, I would email or text the parent and in the invite say "we're happy to do a drop off play date or you're welcome to stay; whatever you and [kid] are comfortable with." Most did drop off, a few would hang for a bit to make sure their kid was comfortable. Other than the kid above, no one else stayed.

Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Started in K for us.

[Anonymous]

We started right around this time for DS when he was in K. He had gone to a few birthday parties, I met a few parents at school events and a field trip. It was always drop off for play dates.

[Anonymous]

My experience is that drop off play dates are common in K, especially when there are older siblings. When I'm inviting a new child over, I usually tell the parents that they are welcome to drop off if they are comfortable with that, but that I'd also be happy to have them stay and chat. I've had parents stay for a bit then leave, parents stay the whole time, and parents who drop their kid off without coming inside along with an uninvited younger sibling (okay, to be fair, that only happened once!).

[Anonymous]

As soon as my kids were toilet trained I was fine with them having drop-off playdates.

My youngest is 3.5 and is special needs which make me unable to trust her to behave herself properly so I don't allow it for her. But my oldest has happily skipped off since she was three years and four months old.

[Anonymous]

The easiest and most natural way in my experience was when the kids started school, parents would offer to pick up their own kid and the friend from school. We'd agree on what time the friend should be picked up. If the other parent dropped off, sometimes it wasn't really clear when they needed to leave.

[Anonymous]

OP, do you mean a "drop-off play date" (where you leave the kid WITH a responsible adult) vs a "parent-free play date" (which implies that there is no parental supervision)?

[Anonymous]

Around 3 y/o for us. Those playdates are obviously shorter than the ones for their elementary-aged peers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, do you mean a "drop-off play date" (where you leave the kid WITH a responsible adult) vs a "parent-free play date" (which implies that there is no parental supervision)?

They mean you dump them off (slow roll really, no need to stop the car) in a field behind an abandoned warehouse. It's all the rage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Around 3 y/o for us. Those playdates are obviously shorter than the ones for their elementary-aged peers.

I've never heard of dropping off a three-year-old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Around 3 y/o for us. Those playdates are obviously shorter than the ones for their elementary-aged peers.

I've never heard of dropping off a three-year-old.

Totally normal amongst my circle of SAHM.