Dinner party-first time meeting friends. Hostess gift?

[Anonymous]

I am going as a date to a dinner party. It will be my first time meeting his friends. We are both in our 40s and divorced. He is a lot more formal than me and the dinner is at a friend of his home in McLean. What should I take as a hostess gift?

[Anonymous]

nice bottle of wine and flowers - always a safe, yet thoughtful bet especially with a hostess you're meeting for the first time.

[Anonymous]

Box of macarons or tinned cookies or a bottle of wine. But as his date, he should bring a hostess gift that covers both of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Box of macarons or tinned cookies or a bottle of wine. But as his date, he should bring a hostess gift that covers both of you.

Should I rely on him to do that?

[Anonymous]

Ask your boyfriend what he is bringing and coordinate. If he brings alcohol, I would prob bring dessert.

[Anonymous]

Yes, if he's super formal he probably already has thought of something to take. Definitely check with him. I'd still take something from me too - flowers or macarons or something nice but not super-imposing. I wouldn't take dessert without checking with the hosts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ask your boyfriend what he is bringing and coordinate. If he brings alcohol, I would prob bring dessert.

That's the thing, he isn't my boyfriend. We haven't even kissed.

[Anonymous]

Ask him. Get a bottle of wine or nice chocolates.

Have a good time!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ask your boyfriend what he is bringing and coordinate. If he brings alcohol, I would prob bring dessert.

That's the thing, he isn't my boyfriend. We haven't even kissed.

So .... okay. It doesn't matter. Reach out to him and say "Hey, what hostess gift are you bringing this Friday night?" and if he says "A bottle of '67 blah blah" then you can say "Ok, I was thinking of picking up a small box of cookies from a fancy bakery to add, ok?" and then you're set. If he says "Uhhh....?" then you know you're on your own for a hostess gift.

[Anonymous]

a bottle of 2007 Joseph Phelps Insignia.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ask your boyfriend what he is bringing and coordinate. If he brings alcohol, I would prob bring dessert.

That's the thing, he isn't my boyfriend. We haven't even kissed.

So .... okay. It doesn't matter. Reach out to him and say "Hey, what hostess gift are you bringing this Friday night?" and if he says "A bottle of '67 blah blah" then you can say "Ok, I was thinking of picking up a small box of cookies from a fancy bakery to add, ok?" and then you're set. If he says "Uhhh....?" then you know you're on your own for a hostess gift.

yeah, it really doesn't matter. you aren't even dating. I would bring a box of macaroons.

[Anonymous]

Ask him to pick up something specific, a bottle of wine or bourbon or something - say, would you mind picking up a nice bottle of red or something you think they might like?

He'll either say (1) sure thing thx for thinking of it (2) already done babe (3) that sounds nice but can you do it? or (4) huh? at which point you'll have to explain to him the concept and offer to coordinate something nice

There might be a (5) in there, but even with long-standing friendships, I get some combination of 1-4, with 1 or 3 being the most common

[Anonymous]

I think all the suggestions are what a wife would do and some are downright mommyish.

Based on what you said, you are not dating you are going on a date at his friend's house? And you have not even kissed yet? Why would you want to go? Shouldn't you do fun things one-on-one to get to know each other?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think all the suggestions are what a wife would do and some are downright mommyish.

Based on what you said, you are not dating you are going on a date at his friend's house? And you have not even kissed yet? Why would you want to go? Shouldn't you do fun things one-on-one to get to know each other?

Yes and this is one of them.

[Anonymous]

Flowers and a bottle of sparkling water or wine.
Flowers for sure.

You are also showing how you'd like to be treated.