Kindergartener told me to "shut up"

[Anonymous]

First time she said "shut up" it was in a quiet, testing way, on response to a request to put away shoes. I said "we do not talk like that, think about that for a few minutes" and left her alone in her room. She hates to be alone so that's usually punishment enough. Second time was the next day after a different chore request. She said it under breath at first, again testing. I pretended not to hear, but then it came back louder.

How do I nip this in they bud so it never happens again and so younger sibling won't pick it up? I know other kids in her class have been experimenting with it since last week she told me that one boy had said it in class and got put in their version of time out. I heard a different classmate say it on the playground before school.

[Anonymous]

She's copying from school. Continue to do what you are doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's copying from school. Continue to do what you are doing.

+ 1

She is testing and wanting attention. Don't feed the beast!

- mom of a 4 yo who thinks testing is her middle name

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's copying from school. Continue to do what you are doing.

What?! My children have never told me to shut up. What school is she going to?!

[Anonymous]

Consequence every time. Out of the moment, you can begin a conversation about how your family's rules might be different than other families' rules, but she needs to follow what you (and other parent, if she has one) say.

My kindergartner has never told me to shut up, but she has definitely picked up a few new phrases that I'm pretty sure come from other kids and their older siblings. Many are cute and inoffensive ("Ya gotta be kidding me!"), others, not so much...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First time she said "shut up" it was in a quiet, testing way, on response to a request to put away shoes. I said "we do not talk like that, think about that for a few minutes" and left her alone in her room. She hates to be alone so that's usually punishment enough. Second time was the next day after a different chore request. She said it under breath at first, again testing. I pretended not to hear, but then it came back louder.

How do I nip this in they bud so it never happens again and so younger sibling won't pick it up? I know other kids in her class have been experimenting with it since last week she told me that one boy had said it in class and got put in their version of time out. I heard a different classmate say it on the playground before school.

I am sorry you are dealing with this. Disrespect isn't good at all at any age. Consistency is good to have with young children, I have a 9year old right now who is disrespectful and consistency is what she needs but she is strong willed so it doesn't always help her. I hope you can find what will work your your child, but yes try to nip it in the bud. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Immediate consequence, "we don't speak like that in our family, that is not nice, etc.".

I am sorry you are dealing with this. This, too, shall pass.

[Anonymous]

Stop disciplining her like she's a 2 year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First time she said "shut up" it was in a quiet, testing way, on response to a request to put away shoes. I said "we do not talk like that, think about that for a few minutes" and left her alone in her room. She hates to be alone so that's usually punishment enough. Second time was the next day after a different chore request. She said it under breath at first, again testing. I pretended not to hear, but then it came back louder.

How do I nip this in they bud so it never happens again and so younger sibling won't pick it up? I know other kids in her class have been experimenting with it since last week she told me that one boy had said it in class and got put in their version of time out. I heard a different classmate say it on the playground before school.

Ha ha. Seriously, keep being consistent. Sometime when she hasn't just said it, explain why it's not nice and what kinds of things she should stay instead. When she does say it, admonish her and impose consequence.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's copying from school. Continue to do what you are doing.

What?! My children have never told me to shut up. What school is she going to?!

A school where one kid said shut up and other kids are trying it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's copying from school. Continue to do what you are doing.

What?! My children have never told me to shut up. What school is she going to?!

No. it is absolutely school. Mine never backtalked or sasses until starting school. Jumped on that like a ton of bricks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's copying from school. Continue to do what you are doing.

What?! My children have never told me to shut up. What school is she going to?!

No. it is absolutely school. Mine never backtalked or sasses until starting school. Jumped on that like a ton of bricks.

K teacher here--it is totally from school.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Yes, I'm pretty sure it's from school. And I'm pretty sure it's a common thing to come up at lots (maybe most) schools. The kids are good; they're just trying it out.

To the op who said so disciplining like a two year old, what is you're suggestion for how to handle this?

[Anonymous]

My mom washed my mouth out with soap. I never said it again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom washed my mouth out with soap. I never said it again.

^^^
This. Tried and true.