SIL issue or no?
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Anonymous
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Need a barometer for this. SIL lives in another state and we haven't seen her in a while. She came up for the birth of our baby and stayed for all of 5 mins before going out to a party. Since then she hasn't called or returned texts. She called DH last week to apologize for not being around and not coming to see our baby and said she would try harder because it wasn't right of her that she hasn't contacted him.
Cut to Thanksgiving and she posted this huge collage of photos of her parents, best friend, boyfriend, every family member, and one of my husband and our baby. She cut me out of the photo and didn't tag me or anything saying "these are the people I'm most grateful for. Love all of them so much." Gotta be honest..kinda hurt my feelings. Is this something to be offended about or does it matter I didn't make her important people cut? I guess cropping me out of a photo is sending me a message? Literally have no idea what I did to her other than had the baby. The last time we saw her before birth she spent the entire meal talking about babies were annoying and she hated people who get fat when they get married... I don't know why this bothers me so much. I feel like it's crazy to care but like I said, it hurt my feelings. I hate that she affects me like this. |
Anonymous
| it honestly sounds like she's jealous or just very very immature. try not to worry about it, OP. |
Anonymous
| Is she young? I wouldn't take it personally. You're her brother's wife. Doesn't sound like you guys are particularly close. I know it's bothering you, but I don't think you should let it get to you. |
Anonymous
| I do not allow myself to get sucked into passive-aggressive moves like being cut out of someone's pictures. She WANTS a reaction from you. Do not engage. Rise above. |
Anonymous
| The passive aggressive dig in person is annoying, but I wouldn't be offended by the rest. Just because she's family doesn't mean you have to be good friends. I'm not sure I'd want to be friends with an SIL like that. |
Anonymous
This is good advice. Personally I would be tempted to find the same pic without you cropped out and send it to her, framed, for Christmas. But I am 45 going on 5. |
Anonymous
| Just ignore her. Unfollow her on Facebook. It sounds like she's not around much so this shouldn't be hard. |
Anonymous
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Not hanging out all day after the baby wouldn't bother me. Babies and new parents are boring.
The photo thing wouldn't bother me. Her comment about fat people were rude, but not a hill to die on. You just had a kid so your hormones are crazy, but you literally have other tings to be focused on right now. Ignore and move on no need to fan the flames of drama. |
Anonymous
Maybe not. I've cut my SIL out of pictures before. I like sil just fine, but sometimes I just want a picture of brother and the kids. |
Anonymous
| Why is it so hard for you that you didn't make the 'thankful' list? You're married to her brother, not her and she isn't close to you. To say that she's 'thankful' for you wouldn't be true, you would see it as the untruth that it is and be back here reaming her for her actions. Get upset if you want to and complain to your DH but what's the point? If she apologized, it would because of him, not because she's really sorry she hurt your feelings. Recognize that not everyone has the same idea of 'family' that you do and that's okay. Let it go. |
Anonymous
Oh please! It soounds like OP has probably been less than pleasant all along and now wants everyone to fall in line because of baby. There is more to this story. |
Anonymous
Do tell, oh wise one. |