Virgins until marriage

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t wait until marriage but my husband is the only one. I can’t imagine making a life commitment with no experience.

Did all the people on this board complaining about their sex lives benefit from the "experience?"

How do you know all the people complaining about their sex lives weren’t the virgins before marriage?

Because it’s very uncommon and few of the sexless or miserable wives or husbands mention it- it seems pertinent.

Same with living together before marriage... most people do it and yet we see so many threads where the husband or wife either changed after marriage or after kids or became absorbed in his work and doesn’t act like a partner.

You don’t need to have sex or live together before marriage- you need flexibility and communication and commitment.

Don't pull a muscle while patting yourself on the back.
My DH had only slept with me and he cheated because he felt he was missing out on experience. And we had sex 2-3x a week including BJs. Please keep your smug to yourself.

Your DH was obviously missing the “commitment” part of marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My SIL was (she and DH are from a very religious family. She was only 20 when they got married.

DH and I started having sex in high school, separated in undergrad, and came back together when he was in med school (married after living together for a year). We scandalized his family!

SIL is in a miserable marriage and DH and I are still very much in love after 18 years and three kids.

Your kids will know you lived together.

NP. So what?

[Anonymous]

No you’re not a dying breed, the last 3 weddings I’ve gone to both the bride and groom waited.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My SIL was (she and DH are from a very religious family. She was only 20 when they got married.

DH and I started having sex in high school, separated in undergrad, and came back together when he was in med school (married after living together for a year). We scandalized his family!

SIL is in a miserable marriage and DH and I are still very much in love after 18 years and three kids.

Your kids will know you lived together.

NP. So what?

Oh my God! My kid knows her parents lived together. The horror!

[Anonymous]

I waited but my husband didn’t

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you all consider being a virgin? No penetrative sexual activity at all, or just no PIV sex?

This is an important question. I grew up in an area with a heavy concentration of a particular group of religious people (that I won't name). The girls considered themselves virgins because they hadn't had PIV...but they had given BJs and had anal. Um, ok.

[Anonymous]

I think age of marriage would be important to know too. I can’t imagine anyone marrying at 35-40 waiting until marriage.

I did not wait. DH lived together for 6 years before we were married.

[Anonymous]

My DH and I waited. We were 27/28. No regrets.

[Anonymous]

Sexual experience is a bonus in my book. I wouldn't be compatible with someone who places a lot of value on virginity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No you’re not a dying breed, the last 3 weddings I’ve gone to both the bride and groom waited.

Oh god, how do you even know this stuff? I can’t imagine people openly discussing my sex life or lack thereof.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you all consider being a virgin? No penetrative sexual activity at all, or just no PIV sex?

This is an important question. I grew up in an area with a heavy concentration of a particular group of religious people (that I won't name). The girls considered themselves virgins because they hadn't had PIV...but they had given BJs and had anal. Um, ok.

Guessing Utah Mormons. The second act you mention is the giveaway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No you’re not a dying breed, the last 3 weddings I’ve gone to both the bride and groom waited.

Oh god, how do you even know this stuff? I can’t imagine people openly discussing my sex life or lack thereof.

It’s pretty obvious, can’t stay out past a certain hour, and these were grown adults in masters programs.
2/3 were very proud of it, and the 1 just ranted to me about it constantly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t wait until marriage but my husband is the only one. I can’t imagine making a life commitment with no experience.

NP. Same here. I wasn’t planning to wait until marriage but the college boyfriend I chose to sleep with ended up being my husband.

[Anonymous]

Didn’t wait. Got married at 28. Even most of my most Christian friends didn’t wait. Unless you get married young, i kind of assume people who wait have some kind of a sexual hang up.