Theyvwi I'd you start out saying, ' this is dinner. Eat. Enjoy.". And, you don't give in to letting them dictate to you the foods they will eat! We never ordered pizza for dinner or anything else.. once in awhile, we took them out to pizza or Chinese food. We also took them to restaurants but not to places where chicken nuggets were on the menu. |
Okay, then when they refuse to eat, you say, “they’ll eat when they’re hungry “, right? Then they’re still up at 10pm crying for food but still refusing what was offered. Or up at 4am crying because their tummy hurts. How far do you take it? How many days? |
Mine are 9 and 12 and neither are traditionally picky although both went through annoying picky phases. For my kids it wasn’t about true pickiness just control so I usually gave in without appearing to (making more things they both would eat for dinner) and allowing for meal modifications (for example I’d add things later they didn’t like to stir fries and soups and serve them before that)
I also took them out to restaurants a lot and not just kid places. Now both are kind of snobs and don’t like kid food other than pizza. But based on their friends I’d say they don’t branch out much until 9/10/11/12 ish. When they start to be really influenced by their friends - mine are really vocal about their love for certain restaurants and food....mine could go to sushi track restaurants daily and I’ve seem their picky friends try stuff when their parents aren’t around lol. It stops being cool to be picky. I know it’s wrong but my 12 yo had a friend who was infamously picky and her and the other kids made fun of it some to her. It becomes uncool at this age to eat lie a little kid. |
+1 to puberty helping. Both of my kids got better when they were more hungry. Now both are in high school and I think they have a lot of peer pressure to try and eat better foods and they do. They really have expanded what they eat and have been exposed to different types of cooking now that they are out at different friends and restaurants. |
I think eating is a bit like sleep. You have to start how you mean to go on and be consistent. If you want them to eat at meals, no snack. If you want them to eat vegetables, serve them first. Make them delicious. Every day, different ones, enthusiasm about vegetables . . . from 6 months on through. When they pitch a fit and say they want something else, which they will -- around 14 months, 18 months, 2 years -- ignore. This is what we have for dinner. When they're not eating because they're bored, make dinner fun. We would listen to music, read, whatever, through that restless toddler phase, until they got used to eating 3 good meals a day. Once they know that's the deal they don't protest and they enjoy it. |
Awful, but they do this because they know you’ll break down and give them what they want. Starving children aren’t waiting for some different meal to come along. |
Around age 9-10, my son started to eat like a normal human. Really, almost anything! I don’t know what changed, but prior to that age he would only eat processed carbs, fruit, broccoli or cheese. He wouldn’t even eat pizza because he didn’t like sauce. |
I am no expert but I think some of it is inborn. Whether that's taste buds or exposure or what, I don't know. My 2.5 year old adores vinegar. Anything with vinegar. Olive oil and vinegar, chicken in vinegar sauce, adobo - if it's got vinegar, she'll eat it. Why? Who knows. She also adores broccoli, raw. My 5 year old hates all vegetables (literally used to gag but we've slowly gotten to a point where he'll take a couple bites of broccoli or cucumber without gagging), hates chicken, hates pretty much all meat actually except processed salty stuff like salami. Only recently has he started eating hot dog, and like a PP said, it was cause for celebration because finally he can eat something if we go to a barbecue. He won't even eat white rice, which sucks because DH and I love Asian food but he will eat literally nothing, while the 2 year old gobbles down spring roll, fried rice, lo mein, chicken, etc. 5 year old basically subsists on pasta, fruit, cheese, nuts, and PB&J sandwiches. The 2 year old won't eat pasta, cheese, or jelly (but will eat straight peanut butter). They have completely opposite tastes. Basically I cook what I want to cook and the 2 year old usually eats it or seems fine skipping the meal if she doesn't want it, and DS has to try some and then can supplement with cheese or yogurt. It's annoying as hell so I'm just keeping fingers crossed that he grows out of it. He won't even eat eggs anymore and he used to eat them several times a week until a few months ago. Gah. |
My stepson became more adventurous around 16 because he didn't want to be embarrassed by his eating habits on dates!!
He's still pretty picky but he does fine at a steakhouse. His picky eating started with multiple food allergies and maybe some sensory issues as a baby/toddler. I used to really worry about it, but it's FINE!! He's 6 foot 3, healthy and in great shape. All those admonishments that he wouldn't grow, for naught! |
My kid also just shifted honestly. He’d eat anything until around 2, including Indian and Thai, and then gradually just stopped eating things he had eaten with gusto previously. Broke my heart when we went back to our favorite Indian restaurant and all he’d eat was the bread. He’s better than some, but can’t tell you how many nights he eats little for dinner and then complains how hungry he is when it’s time for bed. |
DP. I don’t break down but then it’s a meltdown at bedtime. So fun! So I don’t blame those that do break because it’s so damn exhausting. |
I think it starts early, really early. As in, first foods. We always gave them small tastes of whatever we were eating, including “ethnic” foods. My kids are now 9, 6 and 4 and while they still have typical kid preferences, they are much less picky than other kids their age. We go out to eat a lot and they do not like spicy foods, but are great with pickled, tart, or fishy flavors. They also eat their vegetables, with some prompting for ones they don’t like as much. We also always make them try something just once when they whine. And when the grocery stores have samples on the weekend I take them around to the sample stations to try new stuff. |
You probably stopped giving as much adventurous food and that’s why his preferences changed. You need to be consistent. |
I agree with that. Between 2-5, we are pretty strict with not starting the meal with bread. If you go to a restaurant and you want bread, chips, etc. you eat other food first. We explain that this is for health reasons because the body needs vitamins and protein. Our kids get it and they also get that we aren't going to cave and let them sit there and eat bread. I am pretty sure this method is not approved by "parenting experts," but I have two kids who eat everything, love vegetables, and try new foods. That didn't happen because I allowed them to choose only carbs as toddlers. |
Lol, this thread is equal parts infuriating and illuminating. Fellow parents of picky eaters that are working their asses off trying to get their kids to eat what they used to or need to, I see you. I have always offered vegetables, protein, then carbs. I never stopped offering the same variety. Still, the range of foods dwindled and dwindled. Over years, it's slowly getting better. Oh. well. We're all doing the best we can with the kids we can. I know the parents saying, "my kid eats better because I tried harder than you" just have different kids. Just like I know my well behaved, agreeable child is better behaved than the wild kid next to him because he's a different kid, not because of my superior parenting. |