At what age are my child's peers going to expect my kid to have a recent top of the line smartphone?

[Anonymous]

*provocative pictures*

[Anonymous]

LOL they can "expect" whatever they want, whenever they want, but they'll get what I decide to give them, when I decide to give it to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Art what age is the peer pressure going to start?

10 years old? 11? 12?

Bigger question. How will your kids learn to resist peer pressure if you are so sensitive to it yourself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is like top of the line sneakers, more important to lower classes than wealthier kids.

No because top of the line sneakers is not a necessity but a phone of some kind is a necessity.

Many of us grew up before children had cell phones.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child is in fifth and even a phone is a long ways off for us. I’m going to push it as long as I see fit. I have yet to be sold on any real advantage in introducing one.

Sixth is when aftercare ends, schools starts getting out much earlier and transportation changes. For us, these changes meant that a phone made sense, and getting it in June meant my kid could get used to it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on where you live.

and your kid.

My kid doesn't hang with the kind of kid who have the best of everything.

[Anonymous]

My youngest got an iPhone at about 9. BUT, it was handed down to him when an older sibling upgraded. Most kids have smartphones by middle school.

[Anonymous]

10 or so, but I agree with pp that it doesn't need to be top of the line. I'd say the peer pressure is to be able to respond to texts and to have instagram (maybe snapchat). Don't need a top-of-line for either of those things. (Kids will ask for something better, but they won't really left out if they can do those things.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid's classmates started asking in late MS/early HS.

He still doesn't have one. And his classmates' parents are freaking out about how to pay for college. We're not.

(Not to turn this into some victim-blaming screed about how you could afford a house if you didn't eat avocado toast or heath insurance if you didn't have an iPhone. But it's never too soon to start letting your kids know that your spending reflects your values, and fancy electronics for kids didn't make our cut.)

Np: I think this is poor logic. The $45/mo we spend for our son's phone/service in no way affects his college fund nor any other savings goals. But, what you're teaching your child is to judge others and assume that by having new electronics, then that person/family is sacrificing savings. Is that what you intended?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid's classmates started asking in late MS/early HS.

He still doesn't have one. And his classmates' parents are freaking out about how to pay for college. We're not.

(Not to turn this into some victim-blaming screed about how you could afford a house if you didn't eat avocado toast or heath insurance if you didn't have an iPhone. But it's never too soon to start letting your kids know that your spending reflects your values, and fancy electronics for kids didn't make our cut.)

Np: I think this is poor logic. The $45/mo we spend for our son's phone/service in no way affects his college fund nor any other savings goals. But, what you're teaching your child is to judge others and assume that by having new electronics, then that person/family is sacrificing savings. Is that what you intended?

Yes it does. That phone cost several thousand bucks that could have been put in a 529. All so he/she can websurf and interact with idiot friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid's classmates started asking in late MS/early HS.

He still doesn't have one. And his classmates' parents are freaking out about how to pay for college. We're not.

(Not to turn this into some victim-blaming screed about how you could afford a house if you didn't eat avocado toast or heath insurance if you didn't have an iPhone. But it's never too soon to start letting your kids know that your spending reflects your values, and fancy electronics for kids didn't make our cut.)

Np: I think this is poor logic. The $45/mo we spend for our son's phone/service in no way affects his college fund nor any other savings goals. But, what you're teaching your child is to judge others and assume that by having new electronics, then that person/family is sacrificing savings. Is that what you intended?

Yes it does. That phone cost several thousand bucks that could have been put in a 529. All so he/she can websurf and interact with idiot friends.

PP: several thousand? WTF kind of phone are you talking about? What if college is fully funded? We all have financial priorities, but the poster I'm quoting seems to think it's one or the other, it can be both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid's classmates started asking in late MS/early HS.

He still doesn't have one. And his classmates' parents are freaking out about how to pay for college. We're not.

(Not to turn this into some victim-blaming screed about how you could afford a house if you didn't eat avocado toast or heath insurance if you didn't have an iPhone. But it's never too soon to start letting your kids know that your spending reflects your values, and fancy electronics for kids didn't make our cut.)

Np: I think this is poor logic. The $45/mo we spend for our son's phone/service in no way affects his college fund nor any other savings goals. But, what you're teaching your child is to judge others and assume that by having new electronics, then that person/family is sacrificing savings. Is that what you intended?

Yes it does. That phone cost several thousand bucks that could have been put in a 529. All so he/she can websurf and interact with idiot friends.

PP: several thousand? WTF kind of phone are you talking about? What if college is fully funded? We all have financial priorities, but the poster I'm quoting seems to think it's one or the other, it can be both.

Phone + service to make it worthwhile adds up. I don't see how telling your kids that you aren't willing to pay for the top-of-the-line whatever and that spending = opportunity cost is telling someone to judge others. We don't know other families' finances (which I point out), and different families have different rules (which they have heard since they started with "Why can't I? Connor's family lets him" in preschool). I don't talk to him about what his parents' friends are worried about -- it's in the vault. But I'm not sorry we've made the choices we did, and I'm glad he understands that kids who don't get everything they want aren't deprived.

[Anonymous]

What do you mean by "top of the line" cellphone? Your child's peers will expect him to have a cellphone in middle school, but there is no expectation for it to be top of the line my kids have and iPhone 5s and 6s and no one has given them shit about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid's classmates started asking in late MS/early HS.

He still doesn't have one. And his classmates' parents are freaking out about how to pay for college. We're not.

(Not to turn this into some victim-blaming screed about how you could afford a house if you didn't eat avocado toast or heath insurance if you didn't have an iPhone. But it's never too soon to start letting your kids know that your spending reflects your values, and fancy electronics for kids didn't make our cut.)

Np: I think this is poor logic. The $45/mo we spend for our son's phone/service in no way affects his college fund nor any other savings goals. But, what you're teaching your child is to judge others and assume that by having new electronics, then that person/family is sacrificing savings. Is that what you intended?

I’m sorry, are you implying that spending money every month year after year does not impact savings? Of course it does. You may have money to burn (as do I) but let’s not pretend that $600/year plus the cost of the phone is absolutely nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't most of these high schoolers just use these phones to send provocative to one another anyway?

No