Would you wash your boss's dirty dishes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My cousin is here in the US from India to complete his Master's degree. He works in a department at his university doing programming and odds and ends for projects. Sometimes he is sent on gophering jobs like running papers between buildings.

Recently, his boss was in a meeting with other professors. His secretary was out for the day. My cousin was called in and asked to wash his boss's dirty coffee cup and breakfast dishes. My cousin didn't say anything at the time. Later, he tried to talk to his boss but the boss had left for the day. So he wrote an email, saying he would not wash his dirty dishes, it wasn't in his job duties. A week or two later, my cousin got canned.

Some background - in India, washing someone's dirty dishes is considered a low, menial, task reserved for those without education. It would be an insult for a boss to ask such of a white collar employee. Touching someone's used dirty (joota) is considered unclean socially, religiously and culturally.

So, was my cousin out of line for refusing? Was this just an example of culture clash? Or was his boss wrong for asking?

Fwiw, I was born and grew up in the US and I don't think I would have washed the dirty dishes either.

Not only "no," but "hell, no." Your cousin should start raising hell about this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a doctoral student working on a graduate assistantship at a university and there is absolutely no way my supervisors would ask me or any other grad assistant to wash dishes for them. Your cousin needs to take this up with HR. Tell him to bring the email and any other documentation with him to the HR meeting. Absolutely ridiculous that his boss would make this request.

Yes, you're absolutely right if this is an assistantship but the way it's written makes it sounds like it's not part of a funding package, just a random on campus job.

As an employment lawyer with a background in academia, I'd say that there's being technically in the right, and there's being a little politic because you've got bigger fish to fry and want to keep on your boss's good side. The guy could have won this little battle but lost the war -- boss sees him as a pain, won't ever give a good recommendation and might even subtly sabotage him with water cooler chat to other faculty in the department. If it became a chronic problem, then think about taking steps, but for a one-off request, the cousin misplayed the situation.

Agreed, I wouldn't have handled the situation the way the cousin did. That said, once you open the door to washing the dishes, count on more inappropriate tasks coming your way. And "subtly sabotage" with "water cooler chat"?! Please. That's par for the course in academia. You don't need a dishwashing dispute to trigger that sort of behavior.

[Anonymous]

I think it's totally inappropriate to ask another office worker to wash your dishes.

I think that if, as part of the job description, the job you are hired for and agree to take includes dish washing, that's fine.

But if you take an office job and then get asked to wash another person's dishes, I agree that's degrading.

That said I would probably wash the dishes and just look for a new job, instead of objecting and end up fired.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ok, so if the president of your institution makes $500k, that is about $166 per hour based on a 60 hr workweek. Are you saying that their time should be spent doing something, like dishes, that can be done by someone making less to none per hour? Your board of trustees isn't paying any dishwashers $500k, are they?

Well, perhaps we could have the peons eat their lunch for them, too.

You don't really get it--and this is not google-able; I think you have to live in this world. It's the same reason you don't ask admin professionals to make the coffee.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a doctoral student working on a graduate assistantship at a university and there is absolutely no way my supervisors would ask me or any other grad assistant to wash dishes for them. Your cousin needs to take this up with HR. Tell him to bring the email and any other documentation with him to the HR meeting. Absolutely ridiculous that his boss would make this request.

Yes, you're absolutely right if this is an assistantship but the way it's written makes it sounds like it's not part of a funding package, just a random on campus job.

As an employment lawyer with a background in academia, I'd say that there's being technically in the right, and there's being a little politic because you've got bigger fish to fry and want to keep on your boss's good side. The guy could have won this little battle but lost the war -- boss sees him as a pain, won't ever give a good recommendation and might even subtly sabotage him with water cooler chat to other faculty in the department. If it became a chronic problem, then think about taking steps, but for a one-off request, the cousin misplayed the situation.

[ ... ] And "subtly sabotage" with "water cooler chat"?! Please. That's par for the course in academia. You don't need a dishwashing dispute to trigger that sort of behavior.

That's exactly my point. Since academia is such a snake pit of sad egos anyway, grad students and those lower on the food chain should tread carefully and pick their battles wisely. Why hand over an excuse for a grudge? In this case, this wasn't a battle worth fighting unless and until it proved to be the thin edge of a wedge.

[Anonymous]

Same things here in Australia in Sydney. My manager simply left his mugs in the sink and no attempt to clean them at all. One of his favourite people did that for him. Hmmmm. No Asian Culture for both of them. I never wish it and yes as I consider that as insultancy, and I was born in China. Hmmmm..... Dont think it is a smart way to kiss your boss's ass

[Anonymous]

R these food dishes? Or lab dishes (test tubes etc)?