How important is money to you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It kind of surprises me that more people don't want nicely decorated, attractive homes, nice cars, fun vacations, beautiful clothes, household help, money for good haircuts, athletic endeavors, hobbies, college, private school, retirement...... Isn't that the American dream? Who wants to live in a tiny house and have a crappy car? Many of my friends are rich so maybe that tilts my views.

The American Dream to me is having enough money to help my children achieve whatever they desire, and to help others. And knowing I have money.

I don't care about a nicely decorated home or beautiful clothes or nice cars. We do go on fun vacations but don't break the bank. We had household help when the children were small and we needed it. Spending $50 on a haircut is good enough for me.

Just out of curiosity, how much money do you have and how old are you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It kind of surprises me that more people don't want nicely decorated, attractive homes, nice cars, fun vacations, beautiful clothes, household help, money for good haircuts, athletic endeavors, hobbies, college, private school, retirement...... Isn't that the American dream? Who wants to live in a tiny house and have a crappy car? Many of my friends are rich so maybe that tilts my views.

I have to agree with this person. Why is it that people are always claiming on this board that they don't want to upgrade their lives? And, more importantly, why is it that people don't get that having money makes life easier? Money can't buy you happiness but it allows you to focus more on the things that make you happy and it removes stressors that make you unhappy. My DH and I were really happy when we were both in grad school just getting by on our TAships and when we were in the first few years of our careers living in a tiny apartment together. It was a great experience to figure out the world together on a shoestring. But, it is also nice now that we are a bit older to be largely free of money worries. We go out to dinner (or don't) depending on what we feel like. We go to Europe (or we don't) depending on our mood. Our roof leaks, we get a new one without worrying about the cost. We decide we don't like the public school experience our kids are having, we pay for private without letting our decision be driven by money.

Trust me, you would like having money.

[Anonymous]

Money is important, but to a certain extent. Both DH and I value time as a family. We are unwilling to work much more than 9 to 5 or 9 to 6. So there is a ceiling to our earning potential because of that restriction. If DH wanted to make a lot of money it would require 75% travel and very long hours which is not something he wants (I say DH because those working hours and travel is not something I'd ever consider as a Mom). DH also found a way to own a small business and work from home at nights which adds to our income. At our current earnings and family size we are very comfortable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It kind of surprises me that more people don't want nicely decorated, attractive homes, nice cars, fun vacations, beautiful clothes, household help, money for good haircuts, athletic endeavors, hobbies, college, private school, retirement...... Isn't that the American dream? Who wants to live in a tiny house and have a crappy car? Many of my friends are rich so maybe that tilts my views.

I have to agree with this person. Why is it that people are always claiming on this board that they don't want to upgrade their lives? And, more importantly, why is it that people don't get that having money makes life easier? Money can't buy you happiness but it allows you to focus more on the things that make you happy and it removes stressors that make you unhappy. My DH and I were really happy when we were both in grad school just getting by on our TAships and when we were in the first few years of our careers living in a tiny apartment together. It was a great experience to figure out the world together on a shoestring. But, it is also nice now that we are a bit older to be largely free of money worries. We go out to dinner (or don't) depending on what we feel like. We go to Europe (or we don't) depending on our mood. Our roof leaks, we get a new one without worrying about the cost. We decide we don't like the public school experience our kids are having, we pay for private without letting our decision be driven by money.

Trust me, you would like having money.

Duh, of course everyone would like having more money. The question is how far would you go to get it. That's the discussion - would you work more/sacrifice more time, stress, for more $? And my answer is no. We make enough to have some security - retirement, savings, a little college plan for two kids, a cute 3 bedroom house close enough where we can have decent commutes, and enough money to not worry about budgeting every little thing, outsource some stuff, etc. In exchange we have nice jobs we enjoy that get us home by 6. We don't have money for a huge house, great vacations, or fun things I'd love to have like a yoga instructor come to my house for lessons, regular massages and facials, and more handbags. Oh well. It's not like I spend time obsessing about it. I'd also like to have my 22 year old boobs back, but I don't think much about that either.

I grew up with upper middle class parents who by the time I left for college were downright wealthy. So I know it's nice to have the huge house, private school, and nice vacations to Europe. It was cool to have that growing up, but my kids will have a different life. I don't think it will be worse. I never saw my dad, he traveled all the time and worked like a dog. Was very stressed and always wanted to achieve more, make more. My kids see their dad all the time, he cooks dinner, he volunteers at their school, etc. It's a trade off but worth it to me. I'm not complaining about my childhood because it was nice and I know my parents loved me which is the most important thing, but it was definitely different.

But sure, if someone deposited a couple million in my account I wouldn't complain. But I'm not willing to do what my dad did, or be married to someone who works like that, to get it.

[Anonymous]

"But, it is also nice now that we are a bit older to be largely free of money worries. We go out to dinner (or don't) depending on what we feel like. We go to Europe (or we don't) depending on our mood. Our roof leaks, we get a new one without worrying about the cost. We decide we don't like the public school experience our kids are having, we pay for private without letting our decision be driven by money.

Trust me, you would like having money. "

I do have money. Just not a nicely decorated house, fancy cars, or other trappings of pseudo wealth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"But, it is also nice now that we are a bit older to be largely free of money worries. We go out to dinner (or don't) depending on what we feel like. We go to Europe (or we don't) depending on our mood. Our roof leaks, we get a new one without worrying about the cost. We decide we don't like the public school experience our kids are having, we pay for private without letting our decision be driven by money.

Trust me, you would like having money. "

I do have money. Just not a nicely decorated house, fancy cars, or other trappings of pseudo wealth.

It's not pseudo-wealth if you actually have money. Why do you think it makes you a better person to spend your money on whatever it is you spend your money on? If too different people have lots of leftover money and one chooses to spend the money on a home decorator and one chooses to buy a partial stake in a llama farm or leave it in a checking account or invest it in gold bullion, why is the one who decorates her house the lesser person. If you are giving all of your money to charity - sure, but otherwise get off your high horse.

[Anonymous]

"It's not pseudo-wealth if you actually have money. Why do you think it makes you a better person to spend your money on whatever it is you spend your money on? If too different people have lots of leftover money and one chooses to spend the money on a home decorator and one chooses to buy a partial stake in a llama farm or leave it in a checking account or invest it in gold bullion, why is the one who decorates her house the lesser person. If you are giving all of your money to charity - sure, but otherwise get off your high horse. "

Lots of people with nicely decorated houses, fancy cars and trips and private school educations for their kids have high income, not money. Money is high net worth. I don't think it makes me a better person. I was responding to the poster who said she or he was "kinda surprised" that everyone doesn't want these things. Perhaps one reason not everyone wants them is that some of us have been successful in America for over 100 years and we feel no need to act nouveau riche.

[Anonymous]

Having a nice house is not necessarily nouveau riche. It can be very old money. Same for clothes, vacations, etc. You don't have to flaunt it to enjoy it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"It's not pseudo-wealth if you actually have money. Why do you think it makes you a better person to spend your money on whatever it is you spend your money on? If too different people have lots of leftover money and one chooses to spend the money on a home decorator and one chooses to buy a partial stake in a llama farm or leave it in a checking account or invest it in gold bullion, why is the one who decorates her house the lesser person. If you are giving all of your money to charity - sure, but otherwise get off your high horse. "

Lots of people with nicely decorated houses, fancy cars and trips and private school educations for their kids have high income, not money. Money is high net worth. I don't think it makes me a better person. I was responding to the poster who said she or he was "kinda surprised" that everyone doesn't want these things. Perhaps one reason not everyone wants them is that some of us have been successful in America for over 100 years and we feel no need to act nouveau riche.

While I agree with you the whole old money thing really rubs me the wrong way. Sorry, but you have not been successful for 100 years. I'm guessing you are in your 30s or 40s so likely an adult earning money for about 20-30. Other folks before you were successful, and just because you are related to them, doesn't really mean a thing. I don't see the honor on spending someone else's hard earned money. Nothing against it, but it's a not a sign of success. It really just reminds me of trust fund babies. Let's face it, Paris Hilton's great grandfather built that fortune.

[Anonymous]

money most definitely buys happiness.

[Anonymous]

The best things in life aren't things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Financial security is extremely important to me. Being rich-not so much.

My thoughts exactly. When you have a child with special needs you spend a lot of money on interventions. I would hate to not be able to do this. I cannot stand debt other than a mortgage. I've gotten very into providing healthy and organic foods for my family and there is a reason people call Whole Foods Whole Paycheck. I like knowing we can afford to go to the doctor and we can afford to deal with emergencies. A safety net is very important to me.

Do I care about doodads and fancy toys and gadgets? NO, not at all. We are so far behind the proverbial Jones' and I could care less. Even if we could afford to, I would not live in a masion-doesn't interest me. I am not into fancy cars-just safe cars.

I don't understand posts like -- is it because you think saying you value money is wrong or bad? it costs money to fund your retirement, send your childrent to college, pay for intervention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It kind of surprises me that more people don't want nicely decorated, attractive homes, nice cars, fun vacations, beautiful clothes, household help, money for good haircuts, athletic endeavors, hobbies, college, private school, retirement...... Isn't that the American dream? Who wants to live in a tiny house and have a crappy car? Many of my friends are rich so maybe that tilts my views.

I have to agree with this person. Why is it that people are always claiming on this board that they don't want to upgrade their lives? And, more importantly, why is it that people don't get that having money makes life easier? Money can't buy you happiness but it allows you to focus more on the things that make you happy and it removes stressors that make you unhappy. My DH and I were really happy when we were both in grad school just getting by on our TAships and when we were in the first few years of our careers living in a tiny apartment together. It was a great experience to figure out the world together on a shoestring. But, it is also nice now that we are a bit older to be largely free of money worries. We go out to dinner (or don't) depending on what we feel like. We go to Europe (or we don't) depending on our mood. Our roof leaks, we get a new one without worrying about the cost. We decide we don't like the public school experience our kids are having, we pay for private without letting our decision be driven by money.

Trust me, you would like having money.

I've been poor and I've been rich, and rich is nicer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"It's not pseudo-wealth if you actually have money. Why do you think it makes you a better person to spend your money on whatever it is you spend your money on? If too different people have lots of leftover money and one chooses to spend the money on a home decorator and one chooses to buy a partial stake in a llama farm or leave it in a checking account or invest it in gold bullion, why is the one who decorates her house the lesser person. If you are giving all of your money to charity - sure, but otherwise get off your high horse. "

Lots of people with nicely decorated houses, fancy cars and trips and private school educations for their kids have high income, not money. Money is high net worth. I don't think it makes me a better person. I was responding to the poster who said she or he was "kinda surprised" that everyone doesn't want these things. Perhaps one reason not everyone wants them is that some of us have been successful in America for over 100 years and we feel no need to act nouveau riche.

While I agree with you the whole old money thing really rubs me the wrong way. Sorry, but you have not been successful for 100 years. I'm guessing you are in your 30s or 40s so likely an adult earning money for about 20-30. Other folks before you were successful, and just because you are related to them, doesn't really mean a thing. I don't see the honor on spending someone else's hard earned money. Nothing against it, but it's a not a sign of success. It really just reminds me of trust fund babies. Let's face it, Paris Hilton's great grandfather built that fortune.

I don't need the luxury car or the expensive house because my great greatgrandfather was successful in the 1850s in the US. I am not a trust fund baby - my family's success did not result in $$$$ being handed down from generation to generation - but because I come from success, I don't need to spend money to prove "I've arrived."

[Anonymous]

Wow, what a celebration of materialism.
Money is your God

It is amazing how blind people are to this.