Parents of “gifted” kids are so annoying!

[Anonymous]

OP I agree she’s a jerk. She’s probably putting a lot of her identity into this whole parent of a gifted child basket and it may not be for the best.

But I find this discussion so annoying. When we were in school, there were three levels for every subject. Now there is ONE for everyone from children who do not speak English to the most highly gifted kids who come into school reading because they went to fancy preschool. I am the parent of a kid who is definitely gifted (you can fight me, I don’t care) who constantly gets in trouble for exactly the things that everyone in this thread is saying gifted kids do to avoid boredom - the reading, the drawing, the trying to get homework done in class. They are literally supposed to sit there and just wait in rapt attention to the teacher while they go through a basic concept that they learned years ago over and over, taking breaks to deal with behavior issues. My kid got in trouble today for trying to do their last problem set while the teacher was talking - everyone had to do it for extra homework because the class didn’t get to it.

It is true this child is never bored at home or with friends but yes they are bored the majority of every day in school or they are being yelled at to stop reading and do full body listening. I would never complain about this to someone with a similar aged child but yes it is not great. School is not designed to gifted kids anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:On Da Vinci’s “to do list” was to draw the inside of a woodpecker’s beak. This is an example of a gifted person never being bored!

Why do parents worry so much about their “gifted” child? If child is self-motivated, the child will find a way to utilize his/her “giftedness”.

Da Vinci was a genius. There’s a difference between genius and being gifted.

[Anonymous]

does this "issue" really require crowd-sourced advice from strangers? you can slow fade, ignore, disengage, and flat out avoid people whose conversation is boring. their kvetching shouldn't bother you so much unless it's hitting a nerve, like for example, your own kids are struggling.

[Anonymous]

I used to complain that school was boring for my child. But I’m sure it was also boring for some of the other kids! In younger grades when they don’t differentiate, it’s annoying.
But referring to one’s own child as “gifted” is super obnoxious.

[Anonymous]

I was gifted. I skipped a full grade. I took advanced classes. I started taking the SAT in 7th grade, and outscored my older sibling. I had a nearly perfect score on all standardized tests. Academics were and are super easy for me.

I also struggled socially and was an odd kid. I spent a lot of time reading by myself. I am now a very average adult. I have a good job and I do well at a lot of things. I am smart. I still enjoy reading. I think ive done well professionally because i am logical and have a high processing speed and pick up new tasks quickly. But being gifted meant very little in my life overall.

Start telling this other parent that you are sorry their kid carries this burden, it sounds difficult and too bad they are not more nornal! Gifted means next to nothing outside of elementary school academics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I agree she’s a jerk. She’s probably putting a lot of her identity into this whole parent of a gifted child basket and it may not be for the best.

But I find this discussion so annoying. When we were in school, there were three levels for every subject. Now there is ONE for everyone from children who do not speak English to the most highly gifted kids who come into school reading because they went to fancy preschool. I am the parent of a kid who is definitely gifted (you can fight me, I don’t care) who constantly gets in trouble for exactly the things that everyone in this thread is saying gifted kids do to avoid boredom - the reading, the drawing, the trying to get homework done in class. They are literally supposed to sit there and just wait in rapt attention to the teacher while they go through a basic concept that they learned years ago over and over, taking breaks to deal with behavior issues. My kid got in trouble today for trying to do their last problem set while the teacher was talking - everyone had to do it for extra homework because the class didn’t get to it.

It is true this child is never bored at home or with friends but yes they are bored the majority of every day in school or they are being yelled at to stop reading and do full body listening. I would never complain about this to someone with a similar aged child but yes it is not great. School is not designed to gifted kids anymore.

School never was designed for gifted kids. My issue with public school in its current state is that it’s not designed for average kids, either! I feel that school is only serving the bottom 10-20 percent. And even that bottom 10-20 percent would be better off being split: Probably 5% need to be in a different school setting, 5-15% need intensive remedial through pull outs or other measures. The remaining 80% can stay mainstreamed and be leveled.

[Anonymous]

The bottom achievers skew poor and black and if you put the worst performing kids in one class where they can get the help they need, someone will screech that its racist and sue. So schools have to mix them all together to save money on litigation. Only a private school can evade the issue by weeding out low achievers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The bottom achievers skew poor and black and if you put the worst performing kids in one class where they can get the help they need, someone will screech that its racist and sue. So schools have to mix them all together to save money on litigation. Only a private school can evade the issue by weeding out low achievers.

I’m the PP complaining. We don’t have any black or Hispanic kids at school at all. No Free Lunch kids either.

[Anonymous]

Oops “ At all” was a type. We don’t have “many at all.” There are like 2 black kids school wide, and a handful of Hispanic kids.

[Anonymous]

In the mirror I look for Nelson

[Anonymous]

Why do people even want their kids to be gifted?

I was "gifted" (scored off the charts on standardized tests, started reading really early, etc.) and it did not wind up being particularly useful in life.

I'd rather have a kid who had a really great sense of humor, or showed a lot of natural resiliency, or was good at following through on things, or had lots of natural curiosity and a willingness to explore. Like a totally average, on-grade level kid but with those qualities would be ideal. Academic giftedness is not that important because unless you're talking about an actual genius, other people will catch up with a bit of diligence and by the time they are an adult, there is no particular advantage to having been a "gifted child." It's not bad either, it just means your academic development happened earlier than others. Big whoop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do people even want their kids to be gifted?

I was "gifted" (scored off the charts on standardized tests, started reading really early, etc.) and it did not wind up being particularly useful in life.

I'd rather have a kid who had a really great sense of humor, or showed a lot of natural resiliency, or was good at following through on things, or had lots of natural curiosity and a willingness to explore. Like a totally average, on-grade level kid but with those qualities would be ideal. Academic giftedness is not that important because unless you're talking about an actual genius, other people will catch up with a bit of diligence and by the time they are an adult, there is no particular advantage to having been a "gifted child." It's not bad either, it just means your academic development happened earlier than others. Big whoop.

When people say “gifted,” I think they actually mean “reasonably bright.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do people even want their kids to be gifted?

I was "gifted" (scored off the charts on standardized tests, started reading really early, etc.) and it did not wind up being particularly useful in life.

I'd rather have a kid who had a really great sense of humor, or showed a lot of natural resiliency, or was good at following through on things, or had lots of natural curiosity and a willingness to explore. Like a totally average, on-grade level kid but with those qualities would be ideal. Academic giftedness is not that important because unless you're talking about an actual genius, other people will catch up with a bit of diligence and by the time they are an adult, there is no particular advantage to having been a "gifted child." It's not bad either, it just means your academic development happened earlier than others. Big whoop.

When people say “gifted,” I think they actually mean “reasonably bright.”

+1

People need to stop with this gifted nonsense. By definition, gifted people are rare. You probably don't meet many, or any, in your entire life. They certainly aren't choc-a-bloc on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do people even want their kids to be gifted?

I was "gifted" (scored off the charts on standardized tests, started reading really early, etc.) and it did not wind up being particularly useful in life.

I'd rather have a kid who had a really great sense of humor, or showed a lot of natural resiliency, or was good at following through on things, or had lots of natural curiosity and a willingness to explore. Like a totally average, on-grade level kid but with those qualities would be ideal. Academic giftedness is not that important because unless you're talking about an actual genius, other people will catch up with a bit of diligence and by the time they are an adult, there is no particular advantage to having been a "gifted child." It's not bad either, it just means your academic development happened earlier than others. Big whoop.

When people say “gifted,” I think they actually mean “reasonably bright.”

+1

People need to stop with this gifted nonsense. By definition, gifted people are rare. You probably don't meet many, or any, in your entire life. They certainly aren't choc-a-bloc on DCUM.

You don’t know choc a bloc fool

[Anonymous]

I don't brag about my kid being "gifted" even though that's what they are according to the WISC after we went through a full neuropsych. Being gifted comes with a host of issues that are challenging. Like, executive functioning and anxiety.

And giftedness does not mean they finish first always either...