What's your absolute cut off for trying for a child?

[Anonymous]

I had my first just shy of 35 after trying for awhile. Despite resolving the problem, a different problem (undiagnosed) occurred when trying for our second. I was 37 when o got pregnant with her after over a year of trying and - although we made an IVF appointment to learn about options - I’m not sure we would have gone that route. (I ended up pregnant before the appointment occurred.) We were starting to come to terms with the idea of one and done. If we didn’t have any maybe we would have tried longer - or taken a break at tried again - but over a year of monitoring and timing sex etc was getting exhausting in addition to us just being older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My grandmother had children into her late 40s. I thinks she had 13 babies, of which 9 survived to adulthood.

Pre widespread use of birth control, women had their last kid in their 40s on average. The oldest and youngest kid in my mom’s family are 20 years apart.

Both of my grandmothers had their first kids in their early twenties and their last children by their mid 20s. This was in the 1950s before widespread use of birth control. They figured out family planning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My cutoff for myself was 35- I had the kids I wanted by 34 and then decided it was a good place to stop. Had I not had that option, I likely would have given myself to 43 or so. No judgment on anyone else. We don’t control this stuff.

Exactly this. I had my third at 34, but I consider myself lucky in this department. If I had struggled more to get pregnant, I would have gone on through early 40s to have the family of 3 children I wanted to raise.

[Anonymous]

Under 40

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Under 40

Not because I can’t have a kid, but because my chromosomes are probably not too great at that point and I don’t want to pass down damaged DNA. Not fair to my kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My grandmother had children into her late 40s. I thinks she had 13 babies, of which 9 survived to adulthood.

Pre widespread use of birth control, women had their last kid in their 40s on average. The oldest and youngest kid in my mom’s family are 20 years apart.

Both of my grandmothers had their first kids in their early twenties and their last children by their mid 20s. This was in the 1950s before widespread use of birth control. They figured out family planning.

? Good for them?

[Anonymous]

40, but earlier for a 3rd or 4th. I can't imagine having enough energy for that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's some talk about doing away with advanced maternal age as it's essentially not needed and more rooted in misogyny than actual health care.

That’s ridiculous. Doing away with a medical term because feelings are hurt?

The eggs are older and more likely to have genetic defects especially after 40. Women with advanced maternal age should be given the information on what tests are recommended for their age group and let them decide.

THIS.
-signed AMA mom x2

[Anonymous]

40, but if I had infertility challenges and it was a first or second, I would go up to 44.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's some talk about doing away with advanced maternal age as it's essentially not needed and more rooted in misogyny than actual health care.

That’s ridiculous. Doing away with a medical term because feelings are hurt?

The eggs are older and more likely to have genetic defects especially after 40. Women with advanced maternal age should be given the information on what tests are recommended for their age group and let them decide.

THIS.
-signed AMA mom x2

Yeah. There was actually a study a few years ago that showed better outcomes for moms who gave birth at just over 35 versus those who were 34, just below the AMA cutoff. Practically speaking, the risks aren’t much different — but the increased monitoring actually improves outcomes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

That’s ridiculous. Doing away with a medical term because feelings are hurt?

Are you still using the word "ret@rded" on this logic, too?

[Anonymous]

According to the American Pregnancy Association, at age 45, the chance of having a child with Down syndrome is about 1 in 30.

[Anonymous]

My kids were accidents at 34 and 37. I was not planning to have kids. If I did have a cut off though, it would be 45.

[Anonymous]

35

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:According to the American Pregnancy Association, at age 45, the chance of having a child with Down syndrome is about 1 in 30.

90% of Down syndrome pregnancies elect to terminate fwiw...