The Death of Happy Hour

[Anonymous]

I remember those days! In my 20s, I always went out with my coworkers on Thursday night. It was fun and I met my husband that way!

[Anonymous]

Loose lips, make ships sink

[Anonymous]

2008, technology, humanities infertile antisocial suicidal fad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I doubt kids and commute is real issue. Years ago we had kids and commutes.

At my current job we want to take everyone including family to a nationals game after work on a weekday. We pay for tickets, food drinks and people can expenses parking or metro. My old company did this on a Saturday in 2004 and was a big hit. All the families went tons of fun.

This year in 2025 HR got questions is this mandatory. We had to write in big letters voluntary event. Then since we WFH three days a week people ask does this count as an in person day. So we had to make it count as in person. Then we couldn’t even get everyone to RSVP yes or no. Will be last time we do it. Kinda sad.

Kids and commute is a real issue. We want to work and be done with work, especially working moms.

Except the game is after the school year ends. 100 percent of company can “work from home” meaning a free goof off day basically for anyone going. Then just drive to game and can bring husband and kids. Everything is paid for. So no excuse other than don’t want to go, which is fine. We even pay uber or metro. And we have a bus from office parking lot if folks want to do that.

I am sleeping in late that day, then checking email, doing some chores and leaving for game at 4 pm. Hardly stressful. This is why companies stop doing nice things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Loose lips, make ships sink

Wow, you botched this spectacularly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow - I miss happy hours. I used to work downtown and we’d go to ha penny lion and Mr days back in the late 90s. Such great memories.

Often happy hours turned into late, crazy nights. Laptops didn’t exist so you went to work and left your desktop at work so you were free for the night.

Yes! Remember ha penny lion!😁 Especially Friday nights.

[Anonymous]

There’s definitely a feeling that it’s inappropriate to talk about your family or home life at work. It feels safer that way too so you don’t get into bad topics at work like religion, politics, sexual orientation.

I’m a fed and we do still have a very popular monthly happy hour. But we aren’t allowed to advertise it in the lobby or email about it at work. They’re wary of getting in trouble with doge.

[Anonymous]

1. It now costs a lot. I don't want to drop half my week's grocery bill on after work drinks and snacks.

2. I know a guy who said something to a woman at an after-work, off-site, voluntary happy hour and the next morning she went to HR to try to get him fired.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Loose lips, make ships sink

Bad rhymes make times bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. It now costs a lot. I don't want to drop half my week's grocery bill on after work drinks and snacks.

2. I know a guy who said something to a woman at an after-work, off-site, voluntary happy hour and the next morning she went to HR to try to get him fired.

It not just that. On business trips and conferences in 1990s my prior companies paid for happy hours, drinks, going out type events and we used to all go out together. I recall I get nervous in 1999 I have $1,000 on my company card for beers and appetizers in a single night “after” we had dinner together at a conference and my boss would say just write down the names for t&e report. So at a conference or business trips and there is no child care or commute and staff not even paying.

I went to a conference last year in Vegas and everyone hid in their rooms. Not just my company, it was confusing to me as a networking type conference and we all had expense accounts and in Vegas. Meanwhile my 1999 Vegas conference my wife was pregnant first child, given time zone she was sound asleep by 7 pm Vegas time. Everyone dragged me out every night as last days of freedom, my bosses, co workers. I think we were out to 2 am every night. Was so much bonding. My mom sadly died not long later and from that trip several came to wake. They even sent my wife big bouquet of flowers when baby came shortly after trip. And I did same back as I know knew then better.

It is a shame we don’t know or want to know our co workers. I sat Shiver, been to funerals, weddings, baby showers of co workers. But that all stopped pretty much as I don’t know them outside of work anymore, their choice.

We can’t even do the birthday lunch anymore at work. We always bought lunch for everyone on a birthday, but people don’t even want to do birthday lunch with co workers even if company paying and on company time.

I think people are missing out. I talk more to my coworkers from 20-30 years ago then I do my current coworkers or my last two jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s definitely a feeling that it’s inappropriate to talk about your family or home life at work. It feels safer that way too so you don’t get into bad topics at work like religion, politics, sexual orientation.

I’m a fed and we do still have a very popular monthly happy hour. But we aren’t allowed to advertise it in the lobby or email about it at work. They’re wary of getting in trouble with doge.

People are guarded at work. They can't kick back and relax with people who hold power over their career and financial wellbeing.

[Anonymous]

In BigLaw BD the schmoozing and happy hours are alive and well. And everyone does talk about their families.

People who have jobs where they need to develop business/clients or sell something are still doing happy hours and lunches regularly.

[Anonymous]

Kids and commute are a factor for sure, but that isn't new. I think it's also that alcohol-centered work events have become passe for health and/or Me Too reasons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It happened when companies stopped caring about employees. They stopped being competitive with wages, didn't want to train, and outsourced more and more to maximize shareholder profits.

Exactly. Why would I want to be in my work environment any longer than I need to?

[Anonymous]

I’m 32 with no kids. Tried to organize a happy hour and no one responded.

It was quite sad haha . I’m going to try to do one for Juneteenth!