Man left his newspaper on a coffee table and thought it reserved the table?

[Anonymous]

Women do the same thing with their purses. So what's the difference. They lay down their purses and walk away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's fine that you assumed it was empty and sat down, but once he came over and said it was his table, you should have been the better person and give him his table back or invited him to join you

This is the gracious way to handle it.
But OP, it sounds like you were more interested in a confrontation by asking “do you want us to move?”.
You were the a****.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women do the same thing with their purses. So what's the difference. They lay down their purses and walk away.

Completely different, lol. Most women don’t leave their purses unattended, but if they do, you know they are coming back, as opposed to a newspaper that someone might leave for the next person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm hung up on the fact that his seat was opposite a coffee table, so presumably more than just one seat.

This is an ESH situation

I had the same thought. If a place is busy it's rude for a solo patron to commandeer space meant for a group. This is true whether it's a guy sprawled out at a 4-top with his laptop and papers everywhere, and a guy with a newspaper taking over the couch and coffee table.

[Anonymous]

It's reasonable to think that a newspaper on the table doesn't equate to a reserved space. So you were fine to initially sit there.

But you and your wife should have immediately got up and moved *without further questions* once the guy told you that was his table.

You reaction was needlessly confrontational and hostile. That's far worse than the guy cluelessly thinking that a newspaper reserves a table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But you think it's ok to work from "home" at a semi-crowded coffee shop, hogging the table for hours while sipping a coffee? Probably one of those clueless people that also takes calls there.

People like you are the worst.

We ordered food and several drinks. We were just there for ~2 hours while the cleaning people are at our house.

That is too long for a crowded coffee shop. You and everyone else decamping for hours.

I think you mean "camping." Decamping means to leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's reasonable to think that a newspaper on the table doesn't equate to a reserved space. So you were fine to initially sit there.

But you and your wife should have immediately got up and moved *without further questions* once the guy told you that was his table.

You reaction was needlessly confrontational and hostile. That's far worse than the guy cluelessly thinking that a newspaper reserves a table.

I've also worked in retail and have developed the "just get them to go away mentality". Some people are seeking out fights and will do their best to make your day unpleasant. The best thing to do is not to engage. A seat in a coffee shop simply isn't worth the unpleasantness of someone who wants to go on a rant.

You can talk about rewarding bad behavior but remember these guys get off on yelling, for them a confrontation is a reward.

[Anonymous]

The real problem is: MEN.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The real problem is: MEN.

Given a choice, I’d take the bear every time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is always a man.

Oh really? You have some hard facts to back that up?

Of course you don’t. Just typical misandry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Your husband does not understand that women sometimes need to show a lot more force than men when they're harassed, otherwise the men who harass them don't get the message.

You made a mistake anyone would have made, you apologized and you went above and beyond by offering him his table back. So don't worry on that front.

This is basic toxic masculinity at work.

No it’s basic women who don’t understand that men also need to show a lot of force to other men in order to avoid becoming a victim as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DW and I went to WFH at a semi-crowded coffee shop. We saw a table with a copy of the NYT on it. We figured someone left it there and moved the newspaper to a nearby ledge and thought nothing of it.

A few minutes later a man came over and told us this was his table and it was rude that we moved his newspaper. We said sorry we didn't realize and asked if he wanted us to move so he could have the table. He muttered to himself, shook his head, and walked away.

He then came BACK and told us we should know how rude we were. He kept arguing with us so I just raised my voice and told him you can't indefinitely reserve a table in a crowded coffee shop with a newspaper, and to please leave us alone. He kept going on about how he doesn't agree and we just needed to know how rude we were.

DW said I shouldn't have raised my voice but I think this guy clearly doesn't have all his marbles.

People usually "reserve" their seat at a bar or cafe by having a drink on the table, with a top covering, such as a coaster or newpaper, book, etc. and in winter leaving a jacket on the seat.

A newspaper by itself is really ambiguous and might be a custom in some other countries but definitely not the USA, at least not anymore, as newspapers are quite rare even to begin with now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The moment newspaper guy came back to his table and explained the situation you and your wife should have apologized and gotten up to move to a different table.

You didn't handle the situation gracefully. Instead you and your wife acted rather entitled.

Totally agree with this, when he came back you should have gotten up and given him the seat. You were an ahole.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is always a man.

Oh really? You have some hard facts to back that up?

Of course you don’t. Just typical misandry.

Whatever, MAGA.

[Anonymous]

If I entered a “semi-crowded” coffee shop and saw a newspaper on a table I’d have the courtesy to take a good long look around to see if someone might be sitting there.

But, yea, I’m also glad that so many people have been forced back to the office. I live in DC and grew very tired of having to fight off the WFH folks who were hogging all the tables. So inconsiderate.