What is the hardest part of being a single mom?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:SMC of twins here - it was tough in many ways: financially, logistics, and as one poster wrote, it was very lonely. Most kids had both parents at school/sports events, and many times I felt like such an outsider, so different. Also, couples will many times not include a single mom. Also, feel bad for my kids for not having a Dad figure. One of my kids made up a story in 1st or 2nd grade that the Dad passed away.... but I had live-in nannies till kids were 5 years old and then I had occasional babysitters. Now they are 12 and it is much easier in many ways.

THIS is true for me too, as well as my SMC and divorced single mom friends! For example, even though I work full time (in office, not at home) I've tried to make local mom friends by volunteering with elementary PTA and actually planning & executing fundraising events. The other PTA moms bonded, got together for coffee and drinks and then got the families together for pizza but I was always excluded even though I'm a friendly sociable person (and they knew I was single and commented on how "hard" it must be for me)! Same story for soccer team (same team since K) where many of the families get together but exclude the 3+ moms who are divorced, widowed and single. I know it's not me being overly sensitive because one set of the not-married/not-together mom and dad pulled their son from the soccer team for feeling excluded.

[Anonymous]

I am finding it hard now (in empty nest phase).

The younger years were hectic but I loved them.

Now traveling alone, eating alone…feels lonely. It did not before I was a mom.

[Anonymous]

Not the “hardest” but I think school is a challenge because some teachers are more judgy and (I think) call out my DS for every minor thing while his friends who are truly disrupting the class are off the hook. Of course, he’s in Catholic school and surely some teachers don’t agree with single parenthood.