If you were going to name your existing child today, would you change their name?

[Anonymous]

My younger should have been Theodore, nn. Teddy. I lobbied for it; I got overruled . Kid doesn’t like his name, for the record. My spouse just vetoed SO many names, it was hard to find something to work with. I don’t mind the name we chose, but in my heart of hearts, he’s my Teddy.

[Anonymous]

I do like their names but maybe I shouldn't have chosen ones that started with the same letter sound. I'm always calling them the wrong name! I thought it would be cute

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do like their names but maybe I shouldn't have chosen ones that started with the same letter sound. I'm always calling them the wrong name! I thought it would be cute

All parents do that regardless of sibling gender mix, age gaps or initial sounds. Don't beat yourself up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I might change my son’s middle name to match the same middle name as his sister’s (it’s a long story but it’s my original birth last name) or at least not use the middle name my husband really wanted, as it’s a common dog’s name.

We decided to have our children’s middle name be my family name regardless of gender although it makes much more sense for a boy (think a person of historical significance that I am distantly related to).

What’s funny is, when the oldest was in preschool and learning about names and such instead of “Mommy and Daddy,” they asked DH when he was going to change his middle name to ours as I dropped my middle to retain my family name when we got married.

As for their first names, we all still seem happy with them (top 30 or so) but they’ve not met/had more than one or two tops in their entire class/grade.

[Anonymous]

I would swap my first and second kids’ names. There are particular wonderful traits I associate with each of those names, but I gave them to the wrong kids. Oh well!

[Anonymous]

I would pick easy to pronounce and non ethnic names.

[Anonymous]

My oldest had a name that, while fine, was kind of meh (somewhat uncommon biblical name). Conveniently, she transitioned a few years ago and chose a much better option!

[Anonymous]

I mean Isabella is boring but it’s not like a BAD choice that causes negative issues. I much prefer the e versions of these popular names though as they seem like frilly. Isabelle, Sophie, Sylvie, Gabrielle, etc

[Anonymous]

If I were naming my second child today, I would name her for my grandma who died last year. But I didn't want to do that while she was alive (there's a superstition in my family against naming for living relatives).

We named her Clara and I mostly think it suits her. She's caring and tough, like Clara Barton. Our other option for her name when we were pregnant was Isabel/Isabelle, which DH and I both liked, but we couldn't agree on how to spell it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We named our daughters well and were smart enough to use SSA name trend data to avoid HarperAvaSophiaOlivia. To be honest Im not sure why so many supposedly educated couples still pick something that's been in the top 20 for several years and then get all mad when there are one or two other kids in their kid's class with the same name. I mean, the data has been published every year for decades.

I named my now-adult DS1 a name that was ranked #135 when he was born (and had ranked around 135 for the 20 years prior to his birth, so no indication at the time that it was heating up). It's now in the top 10.

I named my DS2 a name that was ranked #677 when he was born. It is now #115.

Sometimes it's not for lack of trying!

[Anonymous]

DS is a William (after FIL) who goes by Liam. I do wish we had used Will instead. He always says he likes having a common name; I would hate it. It was not yet top 20 when he was born, and we only knew a few, so I didn't anticipate the popularity boom. I still love the name, though.

DD's name is much, much less common, though not intentionally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We named our daughters well and were smart enough to use SSA name trend data to avoid HarperAvaSophiaOlivia. To be honest Im not sure why so many supposedly educated couples still pick something that's been in the top 20 for several years and then get all mad when there are one or two other kids in their kid's class with the same name. I mean, the data has been published every year for decades.

This sounds super judge-y, PP. To be honest, DH and I also checked the SSA name trend data and looked up every name we were considering. We both had very common names growing up and there were always multiple kids in each of our classes that shared our names. We really wanted to give our kids names that would be theirs and not something they would need to use their last initial with all the time. But I don't blame people for not knowing it exists or checking it before choosing their kid's name. I'm not sure everyone would pick a unique name for their kid, even if they did use SSA to know which names were in the top 20. You choose a name for your kid based on all sorts of factors and the popularity of the name might not be high on a couple's priority list as a reason not to use a name, even if they'd prefer not to have one of 4 Olivias in a class. Or maybe they didn't realize how much of a pain it would be to yell "Noah!" across a playground and have 3 kids respond. We can't anticipate everything about the names we pick for our kids, including how the popularity (or lack thereof) of their name might play out in day-to-day life. Let's not judge each other over SSA data.

There are also names that might be common in sub-communities, but not reflected in SSA data. There are a ton of Ashers in my Jewish community's preschool right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We named our daughters well and were smart enough to use SSA name trend data to avoid HarperAvaSophiaOlivia. To be honest Im not sure why so many supposedly educated couples still pick something that's been in the top 20 for several years and then get all mad when there are one or two other kids in their kid's class with the same name. I mean, the data has been published every year for decades.

This sounds super judge-y, PP. To be honest, DH and I also checked the SSA name trend data and looked up every name we were considering. We both had very common names growing up and there were always multiple kids in each of our classes that shared our names. We really wanted to give our kids names that would be theirs and not something they would need to use their last initial with all the time. But I don't blame people for not knowing it exists or checking it before choosing their kid's name. I'm not sure everyone would pick a unique name for their kid, even if they did use SSA to know which names were in the top 20. You choose a name for your kid based on all sorts of factors and the popularity of the name might not be high on a couple's priority list as a reason not to use a name, even if they'd prefer not to have one of 4 Olivias in a class. Or maybe they didn't realize how much of a pain it would be to yell "Noah!" across a playground and have 3 kids respond. We can't anticipate everything about the names we pick for our kids, including how the popularity (or lack thereof) of their name might play out in day-to-day life. Let's not judge each other over SSA data.

There are also names that might be common in sub-communities, but not reflected in SSA data. There are a ton of Ashers in my Jewish community's preschool right now.

+1

I also just don't hear parents complaining about top 10 names being too common. Most people I know who used a top 10 name went in with eyes open, knowing the name would likely be more common, but choosing it anyway because they wanted to (they loved the name, and often, the child was named for a relative with the same name).

What I hear more often is parents who use a name outside the top 20 or so, and it winds up being more common in their area than they thought. I've seen that happen more than once, and I have empathy for it. Like your Asher example, there are definitely little micro trends in every area and you can't always anticipate them, especially for a first-born child since brand new parents don't get the benefit of knowing lots of babies/toddler and their parents, and therefore being privy to the local baby name trends.

I love my DD's name and I think it's just right for her, but I laugh to myself sometimes because almost every single name on our short-list of 6 names has been the name of a child in one of her various classes. This includes names in the 600s and 800s on the social security list. I had thought the names were original and special to me, but I was obviously tapped into some kind of zeitgeist because despite their relative obscurity nationally, every one of those names is part of a micro trend in my area. Somewhat surprisingly, the name we wound up choosing is a top 50 name and we've only ever met one other kid with that name and it was just a random child on a playground we rarely go to -- no other kids with that name in our daycare or elementary. Go figure.

[Anonymous]

We have an Isabella and we love the name. It‘s a family name for us, but also without the warm associations, I think it‘s a beautiful name. Hope your daughter likes it.

[Anonymous]

Very happy with my kids' names. I did wonder if Jacob would be annoyed by running into too many of them but he's named for my father and it was important to me so I didn't let popularity dissuade me. Fortunately, the name seemed to have passed its peak around here so he only had one other Jacob in his grade.