99% of the time it is the parents. At my daycare kids will eat anything and everything I make for them. We’re talking salmon, fish, spaghetti, chicken. I make Indian, Caribbean, Latin, you name it I make it. The kids will eat everything and the parents complain that the kids won’t eat anything for them at home. Gee, I wonder why? |
Nope, never caved. I don't allow gatorade and doritos are a few times a year... |
Uh huh. We did the same. Where we "fell off the wagon" was when the kid's pediatrician said he'd fallen off his growth curve and we needed to focus on his gaining weight. He refused to eat avocadoes, eggs, tofu, beans, cooked chicken, beef, or pork in any form, sausage, nut butters (even in baked goods), yogurt, and cheese (we kept serving them, but they went untouched). We found a few options but it was not a varied diet of healthy foods we were all eating, it was catering to pickiness so he'd be able to grow. The thing is, kids DO have a choice, unless you are literally force feeding them. The choice is not eating. |
| My child, who is extremely picky had severe dairy soy allergies as a baby and we thought had out grown them but recently realized she is lactose intolerant still. We have been busy keeping her alive and it has been easier to expand her diet now that we understand certain foods cause a lot of discomfort. If I were your sister having some favorite chicken nuggets and goldfish available would be a great kindness, but I would also have learned by now that people enjoy being judgmental rather than being helpful and I’d have a back up plan in place. |
Eh, you did good things but were also lucky. One of my two is fairly picky and I did all of the above. The other kid eats everything and is an adventurous eater, but my youngest is kind of picky. Not like what OP is describing, but picky. Sometimes with kids they just are the way they are. I also wanted my kids to be readers. We did everything right. All adults in family read all the time, kids were read to daily starting at several months old, toms and tons of books, books all over house, no a lot of screen time when little, trips to the library every week. The picky eater (great kid and good student by the way) also strongly dislikes reading. Sometimes as parents we overestimate our. Intrigued over things. |
*But know which color grapes they will eat. I'm a picky eater and only JUST learned at 45 to eat red grapes. Or just get both colors. |
How does a roast chicken help this if that’s not one of the foods they eat?! |
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1) Keep fresh fruit and preferred snacks on standby, in case they refuse to eat and show signs of starvation. Otherwise have them sit at the table and have a drink they like for a fixed period of time and then let them scamper off.
2) Ask sister what go-tos are - if it’s an omelet or boiled pasta with butter or something easy, just do it. 3) If they ask for pasta with ketchup or some other crime against humanity…refuse. My mother would clutch her chest and say, but “we…are…Italian” for dramatic effect. 4) Ask sister what preferred brands are and try to accommodate within reason. 5) Consider involving kids in cooking so they can taste. That can inspire appetite. 6) Some of their pickiness might be confirmation bias by parents - their taste buds can change. Encourage tasting. 7) Try not to fixate on what they are eating/how much, avoid shaming - stop the Boomers from injecting shame or commenting on weight or which kid loves bread too much, etc. 8) Try not to stress too much - the stress gets into the food. The point of the meal is being together. 9) Encourage sibling to be proactive and help when needed. For example my sister said niece only eats peeled English cucumbers. I say, what a shame, I can reliably get Persian cucumbers - can you pick some up - and I then I beckon her into the kitchen with a glass of wine and a peeler. 10) if there is a child who is a reliable eater of diverse foods, sit them next to the picky kids and model more adventurous eating behavior. |
Most of these things are fine if you are the parent. They are not in any way appropriate for a host do with someone else’s child. |
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My kids are picky eaters. They won’t touch any soup, most meat, or even mash potatoes.
Most kids will eat plain noodles and plain bagels or tortillas You can ask your sister what cheese and/or fruit they like. We have tacos, kids take what they want, which sometimes is just tortilla, shredded cheese and cucumber slices. Sometimes it’s also plain chicken strips and sour cream. I leave a bit of chicken without spices. We have spaghetti and meatballs and leave some noodles plain. Kids eat noodles with parm cheese, maybe a bread stick and some baby carrots. Sometimes they will dip the breadsticks in the sauce served in a small bowl so it doesn’t touch anything else. One kid sometimes will eat a “dry” meatball with no sauce. Even stir fry is ok if I leave some rice and meat plain. |
For one’s nieces or nephews? Maybe the parents should make their kids pre-game at home, with no expectations of their hosts catering to them in any way. |
This. Just have a selection of things. Or, if you can, get recommendations from your sister. |
Which is exactly what these kids mother has asked for and which OP is disrespecting. OP is trying to prevent the mother from doing that. |
| Butter pasta |
| Lunchables |