Why are DCUM salaries so much higher than in "real life"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dh earns $2m+. We live in an affluent area and country club members. I’m pretty sure most/all families we know have a HHI of 400k+.

Two feds are probably the lowest earners we know and even they will have a HHI of $200k.

To answer your question, I think it is probably a mix of all 3. I don’t lie about income but I sometimes change specific details of a post in attempts to stay anonymous.

THat's not lying---changing key details to stay anonymous does not affect the gist of the message

[Anonymous]

I do think some of the posters exaggerate, but I also don't think it's THAT far-fetched. DH and I are 30/31 and seem like we have pretty regular jobs. He makes $160 and I make $140 and we each get bonuses so we're a $300-350k household which sounds weird to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH makes almost 1M (including bonus) and you’d never know it if you met us. We live in a nice but not extravagant house. We drive normal not flashy cars. Our kids go to public. We go to Bethany for vacations, not Turks and Caicos. I don’t work but other than that we wouldn’t seem to make that much. So I think likely there are a lot of people making a lot of money and you just have no clue. (Also, in our neighborhood I feel like we are on the lower income side based on the houses and cars and vacations of my kids’ friends)

We make more than that and are UHNW. Yet, in reality we are still fairly frugal. I drive a 12 yo vehicle, person with newest car is our 17yo (since new cars are a better deal right now than used cars and we needed a vehicle for the teen). We do take fancy vacations (Europe, Hawaii, etc) but still are focused on getting a good deal and are planned for. Still fly coach unless business is an amazing deal---just cannot bring ourselves to spend the extra despite being able to "afford" it. I find the people that actually have the money are not extravagant, those that appear extravagant are often leveraged to the max.

I find this pathetic. You’re a hoarder living so much smaller than you need to. You can’t take it with you.

NP. The goal is not to take it with me; the goal is to leave a legacy, so that each next generation doesn’t have to start from nothing like I did. I know, it’s hard to understand for people like you.

Right!?!?! That poster would most likely blow thru millions with nothing to show for it. Not to mention, that I don't want my kids to be entitled---they will get financial help from us, but they still need to work in life as if we are not helping them (unless there is a major issue, medical or otherwise that prevents that). My kids will work hard and excel at life as if their parents did not come into extreme wealth. Yes, we will pay for college, first cars (and future cars as needed), family vacations, downpayment for house/condo, and provide for future generations to do the same. Our help will be the bonus for them and for any true emergencies we will obviously step in and assist.
But I feel that my grandkids and GGK and beyond deserve some of that legacy rather than us just blowing thru it on ridiculous extravagance. And we will pick a charity(ies) to support and champion, ensuring our millions help more than just a few.

You don’t want them to be entitled so you’re leaving them an entitlement-generating trust? You might be rich but you’re also a big ol’ ding dong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH makes almost 1M (including bonus) and you’d never know it if you met us. We live in a nice but not extravagant house. We drive normal not flashy cars. Our kids go to public. We go to Bethany for vacations, not Turks and Caicos. I don’t work but other than that we wouldn’t seem to make that much. So I think likely there are a lot of people making a lot of money and you just have no clue. (Also, in our neighborhood I feel like we are on the lower income side based on the houses and cars and vacations of my kids’ friends)

We make more than that and are UHNW. Yet, in reality we are still fairly frugal. I drive a 12 yo vehicle, person with newest car is our 17yo (since new cars are a better deal right now than used cars and we needed a vehicle for the teen). We do take fancy vacations (Europe, Hawaii, etc) but still are focused on getting a good deal and are planned for. Still fly coach unless business is an amazing deal---just cannot bring ourselves to spend the extra despite being able to "afford" it. I find the people that actually have the money are not extravagant, those that appear extravagant are often leveraged to the max.

I find this pathetic. You’re a hoarder living so much smaller than you need to. You can’t take it with you.

NP. The goal is not to take it with me; the goal is to leave a legacy, so that each next generation doesn’t have to start from nothing like I did. I know, it’s hard to understand for people like you.

Right!?!?! That poster would most likely blow thru millions with nothing to show for it. Not to mention, that I don't want my kids to be entitled---they will get financial help from us, but they still need to work in life as if we are not helping them (unless there is a major issue, medical or otherwise that prevents that). My kids will work hard and excel at life as if their parents did not come into extreme wealth. Yes, we will pay for college, first cars (and future cars as needed), family vacations, downpayment for house/condo, and provide for future generations to do the same. Our help will be the bonus for them and for any true emergencies we will obviously step in and assist.
But I feel that my grandkids and GGK and beyond deserve some of that legacy rather than us just blowing thru it on ridiculous extravagance. And we will pick a charity(ies) to support and champion, ensuring our millions help more than just a few.

You don’t want them to be entitled so you’re leaving them an entitlement-generating trust? You might be rich but you’re also a big ol’ ding dong.

Likely you will never be wealthy, certainly not personality-wise.

Didn't say we are leaving it all to them. Significant portion will go to charity. But yes the kids, grandkids, and future generations should have enough to pay for education and downpayment for first homes. However, we still expect them to work, the trust/extras will be just that the "icing on the cake" so to speak. This will allow them to have a SAHP or a meaningful job that will never pay a lot (think social worker, non-profit, etc.) Raise your kids right and they wont be entitled brats, no matter how much money you have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know DC is a HCOL area so salaries are higher than normal, but the $400K-$2M salaries that are often bandied about here are so unreal to me. I can only think of three possibilities to explain this:

1) DCUM is a congregation that specifically attracts this small subset of high earners

2) These salaries are more common than I think, and they simply go unnoticed because people generally don't talk about money openly

3) People are lying liars who lie about their income.

Which is it?

Or 4) few high income SHAMs posting all day while husbands are working

3 or 4. I doubt that people making that much money will use their free time to post on DCUM.

This may be true. Dh earns a seven figure income and I’m a sahm. I come on these boards to find information for my 3 kids. I have a lot of questions from sleep training to birthday party food and guest drama.

Dh is a surgeon and busy.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they lie by adding spouse's salary to theirs. They say, I make $500K per year, but in actuality, they should say husband makes $450K and I make $50K as part time attorney.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe they lie by adding spouse's salary to theirs. They say, I make $500K per year, but in actuality, they should say husband makes $450K and I make $50K as part time attorney.

Pretty sure whenever I come is mentioned it is HHI.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe a little 3, but mostly 1 and 2.

Most families I know with two working parents make at least $400k. Plus there are TONS of lawyers. Some entrepreneurs and executives.

Are you kidding?
Most families I know with two working parents have one who is part time or in a lower paying field. Most aren’t making 400k! Wow!

Guess we know different families.

We aren't lawyers so we feel poor at <$1M HHI.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know DC is a HCOL area so salaries are higher than normal, but the $400K-$2M salaries that are often bandied about here are so unreal to me. I can only think of three possibilities to explain this:

1) DCUM is a congregation that specifically attracts this small subset of high earners

2) These salaries are more common than I think, and they simply go unnoticed because people generally don't talk about money openly

3) People are lying liars who lie about their income.

Which is it?

Almost every person who posts on this site is lying and exaggerating. There is another current post in Money and Finance on having a 15 year vs. 30 year mortgage. What’s interesting there, is that every sound and conservative advisor knows that a 15 year mortgage is the way to go. Yet on DCUM, there is a high concentration of vehement opposition to a 15 year and support for a 30 year. This makes no sense for a group that is allegedly pulling in $500K+ in HHI. People on here know enough to lie about HHI, net worth, and home values. But, they’re not smart enough to know about the less obvious wealth revealing indicators. I especially like the ones in their mid-30s they already have 1M+ in their 401k and retirement plans. A near impossibility given federal limits on annual contributions. They’re just to dumb to know this isn’t possible.

Actually, when your income is that high and the mortgage rates were as low as they were recently, it made total sense to go with a 30 year mortgage. At that level of income, your home is a small part of your wealth and you should be aiming to keep things flexible.

+1

We have always done 30 year and pay down premium at our own pace, but like the flexibility/leverage.

This. Especially if interest rates are low, take out a 30 year and pay more than required. You have cheap money and flexibility.

Also, the PP who equated mortgage debt and credit card debt is either nuts, or pretty ignorant.

That would be you, actually. No one previously equated these two forms of debt; only your misinterpretation of the English language has implicitly done that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I confess. I lie here. And I lie on other forums. Why do I lie? - Mainly to not give too much identifying detail
- Sometimes to crowdsource info because DCUM is also a great place to get info and advice
- Sometimes to give good and relevant info to DCUM
- Sometimes to shut up some annoying posters

But yes, mainly the top three.

People like you ruin these forums. Why lie when you don't have to? It's insane. I wish people like yourself would leave these boards for good. Keeping posts honest but anonymous is what makes this place nice. You are why we can't have nice things. You have some real problems if you can't even be honest on a anonymous message board.

You are a clown for believing everything you read on the internetz

Well that went over your little head. The point is this site is anonymous why wouldn't you keep this site honest it makes it more enjoyable to read and get real answers from people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I post my income on DCUM. I do not post my weight. I am sure many people are happy to share the most brag-worthy thing about their life but keep to themselves the thing they are struggling with.

I'm not you but hovering at 140. Was a nicer 130 before covid but hell, I make my money with my head so it works for me.

Proving my point. Start a thread asking people to post their height and weight and I bet you’ll turn up almost only healthy BMIs. People like me will just keep scrolling. Ask me about HHI and I’m there.

So true! Same thing on the beauty board - everyone is wrinkle free at 45 and mistaken for late 20s. Certainly doesn’t align with what I see in public everyday, but the unicorns flock to certain threads.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe a little 3, but mostly 1 and 2.

Most families I know with two working parents make at least $400k. Plus there are TONS of lawyers. Some entrepreneurs and executives.

Are you kidding?
Most families I know with two working parents have one who is part time or in a lower paying field. Most aren’t making 400k! Wow!

That’s mostly a function of where you live, though, right? Most families with one or two working parents in my Bethesda neighborhood make at least $400k. That was not the case when I lived in Blacksburg.

[Anonymous]

This board is dominated by in DC, close-in suburbs, and relatively close-in ‘burbs. So mostly Mclean, Arlington, Bethesda, Chevy Chase, NW and NE and Capitol Hill dc. That means you are commuting to somewhere within the downtown DC sphere- or the DOD or NIH- and that’s a very specific type of person with dual college education and likely advanced degrees double income couples. That is not normal to the rest of the country. Add in the inherited UMC and UC money and you get a fairly high net worth set of individuals.

I didn’t grow up with money as my family had financial difficulties, but I went to private school and university with these people. When I started posting on DCUM for help with my budget after my first child 8 years ago our household income was $250 dual. It is now $450 hhi. This was from both myself and my partner working our tails off. We also received a $200k gift and borrowed to it a down payment on a house. Between all the savings and the gift, we are now at ~$1.9-2 net worth, with about $700k in retirement, and paid off $100k of student loans via cash flow, and childcare . I think many couples in my neighborhood have their parents do things like sell thier family home to them, or free childcare, etc. etc. If one or both income earners get into high paying jobs, then you continue the process for the next generation etc.

What I’m worried about though is that the democracy that has resulted in the world biggest wealth production is straining. So I’m not feeling comfortable even with this level of income security. It hurts to see how bad gas prices are for service workers, and someday that could be me. Life is not predictable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This board is dominated by in DC, close-in suburbs, and relatively close-in ‘burbs. So mostly Mclean, Arlington, Bethesda, Chevy Chase, NW and NE and Capitol Hill dc. That means you are commuting to somewhere within the downtown DC sphere- or the DOD or NIH- and that’s a very specific type of person with dual college education and likely advanced degrees double income couples. That is not normal to the rest of the country. Add in the inherited UMC and UC money and you get a fairly high net worth set of individuals.

I didn’t grow up with money as my family had financial difficulties, but I went to private school and university with these people. When I started posting on DCUM for help with my budget after my first child 8 years ago our household income was $250 dual. It is now $450 hhi. This was from both myself and my partner working our tails off. We also received a $200k gift and borrowed to it a down payment on a house. Between all the savings and the gift, we are now at ~$1.9-2 net worth, with about $700k in retirement, and paid off $100k of student loans via cash flow, and childcare . I think many couples in my neighborhood have their parents do things like sell thier family home to them, or free childcare, etc. etc. If one or both income earners get into high paying jobs, then you continue the process for the next generation etc.

What I’m worried about though is that the democracy that has resulted in the world biggest wealth production is straining. So I’m not feeling comfortable even with this level of income security. It hurts to see how bad gas prices are for service workers, and someday that could be me. Life is not predictable.

You went to private school yet didn’t grow up with money?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know DC is a HCOL area so salaries are higher than normal, but the $400K-$2M salaries that are often bandied about here are so unreal to me. I can only think of three possibilities to explain this:

1) DCUM is a congregation that specifically attracts this small subset of high earners

2) These salaries are more common than I think, and they simply go unnoticed because people generally don't talk about money openly

3) People are lying liars who lie about their income.

Which is it?

Almost every person who posts on this site is lying and exaggerating. There is another current post in Money and Finance on having a 15 year vs. 30 year mortgage. What’s interesting there, is that every sound and conservative advisor knows that a 15 year mortgage is the way to go. Yet on DCUM, there is a high concentration of vehement opposition to a 15 year and support for a 30 year. This makes no sense for a group that is allegedly pulling in $500K+ in HHI. People on here know enough to lie about HHI, net worth, and home values. But, they’re not smart enough to know about the less obvious wealth revealing indicators. I especially like the ones in their mid-30s they already have 1M+ in their 401k and retirement plans. A near impossibility given federal limits on annual contributions. They’re just to dumb to know this isn’t possible.

We have a 500k HHI and a 30-year mortgage. It is mostly to give us flexibility if we choose to take an overseas assignment and come down to one income temporarily. We can easily afford a 15-year. And no, not every advisor would recommend a 15-year. You should come out ahead if you put the difference between a 30-year and 15-year into the stock market. I dont oppose a 15-year, but in some cases 30-year just makes more sense, particularly if the rates are as low as they were until a few months ago.