Can a parent see that other children are more beautiful than their own children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and can be very culturally dependent. I have a coworker who makes a lot out of her daughter’s platinum blonde hair. I feel sorry for the kid if it darkens because that is all her mother ever brags about.

well to be fair probably most moms are going to be sad when their kids blonde hair starts to darken so she wouldn't be in the minority.

We live in a country full of Nazis.

Np. My family is very liberal and still likes their blonde hair and blue eyes. It’s just unique. (I have neither)

It’s the same as me hoping my kids have my own curly hair.

Blond hair and blue eyes are far from unique. Now blue hair and blond eyes…that would be something.

It might be because I’m not white and my kids aren’t, either, but there are a lot of little blonde kids at my kid’s preschool and they all look pretty similar to me. All the kids are cute, they are 3 and 4, but I think all the blonde haired kids are pretty much equally cute and this “look” doesn’t really stand out to me, it’s so common where I live.

[Anonymous]

The better question is why is our society so screwed up that parents will rarely admit to their child being unattractive but will easily share that they aren’t athletic or good at math. Why do we pour so much attention and praise on our children and others for something they had nothing to do with? Then we wonder why they are so obsessed with their appearance. Pot meet kettle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The better question is why is our society so screwed up that parents will rarely admit to their child being unattractive but will easily share that they aren’t athletic or good at math. Why do we pour so much attention and praise on our children and others for something they had nothing to do with? Then we wonder why they are so obsessed with their appearance. Pot meet kettle.

Meh.

Sports and Math are more objective than attractiveness. And there is usually one right answer in Math. 2 + 2 = 4. Always.

My kid swims. Some of her peers usually swim to the finish line much faster than she does. So she is clearly not the fastest(not even close).

Who determines who is most attractive? Is there a definite scale. There are general consensus on some attributes, but there is also a wide variety across and within cultures.

Some posters have mentioned that they do not think blond hair is attractive. Where I come from blue/green/hazel/brown eyes are actually scary(ignorance of course, but you get the point). Attractiveness is more subjective. So it's easier to project and misjudge a little here(or a lot).

Perhaps there is a biological explanation too. Perhaps one is more likely to take care of their young if their young is pleasing to their eyes. Perhaps nature made it this way?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yup. I also knew when my babies looked ugly (one sincerely never did and the other two had very unfortunate stages as wrinkled old man new babies). I’m guessing they’re just saying this because moms are supposed to.

I love this and have a similar family. One strikingly attractive child, two good looking ones who went through unfortunate, if brief, ugly baby status/ I swear it made me love them more - like “oh you ugly little darling the world will be inking to you so I will love you fiercely” type feelings, haha.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A young Grace Kelley or young Paul Newman? Yes, I can see it.

You nailed it. People can see it when the other kid is MUCH more beautiful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The better question is why is our society so screwed up that parents will rarely admit to their child being unattractive but will easily share that they aren’t athletic or good at math. Why do we pour so much attention and praise on our children and others for something they had nothing to do with? Then we wonder why they are so obsessed with their appearance. Pot meet kettle.

Because with hard work they can become more athletic and better at math, but hard work won’t do much for a child’s look. If a kid has an ugly face (plenty of kids out there do) there is nothing the child can do about it…

[Anonymous]

Good friends of ours are a very attractive couple. They have two kids (9 and 7) that are both really ugly… objectively… they have this very thin faces with small eyes and big noses and then lips. They are both blonde with blue eyes, but in my opinion, still not attractive.

I bet both these kids will become attractive adults.

I also have a couple of VERY ugly parents with 2 kids, one average and one strikingly beautiful. This girl is blonde with blue eyes, perfect facial features, etc. I bet she won’t be a striking adult because she is bound to look more like her mom and dad….

Looks in kids are not that important because kids will grow and change.

[Anonymous]

Of course, but then again my son a unique, striking genius, and the neighborhold knows *that* so…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The better question is why is our society so screwed up that parents will rarely admit to their child being unattractive but will easily share that they aren’t athletic or good at math. Why do we pour so much attention and praise on our children and others for something they had nothing to do with? Then we wonder why they are so obsessed with their appearance. Pot meet kettle.

Because with hard work they can become more athletic and better at math, but hard work won’t do much for a child’s look. If a kid has an ugly face (plenty of kids out there do) there is nothing the child can do about it…

What? You can absolutely get a better haircut, clothes, get in great shape, etc every bit as much as you can try to do extra math. Neither will overcome heritable problems or replace prodigious gifts, but they maximize what you have to work with.

[Anonymous]

My kids are pretty good-looking. Tall, thin, athletic, thick dark hair, pretty features. They both dress and are smart. My nephew is not handsome, overweight, not athletic, and flunked out of college. Grandma blatantly favors nephew however. Once, I asked her if objectively speaking my kids were better looking (they are) and she wouldn’t comment.

[Anonymous]

of course we can! There are lots of children more beautiful than mine. And mine are more beautiful than many others. What a silly question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are pretty good-looking. Tall, thin, athletic, thick dark hair, pretty features. They both dress and are smart. My nephew is not handsome, overweight, not athletic, and flunked out of college. Grandma blatantly favors nephew however. Once, I asked her if objectively speaking my kids were better looking (they are) and she wouldn’t comment.

You sound horrible. Why would you ask anyone such a question?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are pretty good-looking. Tall, thin, athletic, thick dark hair, pretty features. They both dress and are smart. My nephew is not handsome, overweight, not athletic, and flunked out of college. Grandma blatantly favors nephew however. Once, I asked her if objectively speaking my kids were better looking (they are) and she wouldn’t comment.

You sound horrible. Why would you ask anyone such a question?

+1

[Anonymous]

No

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A young Grace Kelley or young Paul Newman? Yes, I can see it.

You nailed it. People can see it when the other kid is MUCH more beautiful.

+2.