| We need help - both kids have ADHD and LDS school is hard fir them and they're beat by the time they get home. I let them have a break but then we're into dinner etc and homework is getting done far too late and with a lot of struggle. Kids are in 5th and 7th at very good private schools. |
| I guess what I'm asking is what's your "schedule" afterschool for your kids? Do you allow phones, video games, tv etc? |
In middle school, no screens on weeknights (unless the screen was for school). School, a break, homework dinner homework bed. That's the deal. During those years my son also had sports and religious training. There was little down time on weeknights and certainly no screens. |
| For us, the key is to get the kids onto their homework ASAP after school because they can run out of steam like yours. No screens during the week (other than school-related) and phones must stay at kitchen charging station after school. It used to be rare that they didn't finish homework before dinnertime, but now it's the other way around - they just have more HW. But they have a goal of getting it all done except for 1-2 classes before dinner so it's not too much. Sometimes they finish some homework during breaks at school. Assuming your kids are ADHD-medicated, perhaps split the dosage for a later afternoon boost. |
Thanks! Do they do sports or other activities? What time do you eat dinner? |
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Mine get home by 3pm most days. Snack, homework, instrument practice, reading. Once all of that is done they can have up to 1 hr of screen time. DS has a sports practice on Fri evening. DD has more activities - instrument practice one day, art class, two sports practices (1 day in the evening, 1 day at school) - so her time is more constrained.
DH works at home so he's usually the one taking kids to their activities, although DS can walk to his practice and DD can walk to art class so that helps. I'm usually home by 5:30 and do the cooking and we eat around 6:30-7:00, working it around kids activities. Bedtime is 9pm. |
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They come home after school and have a little time to kick back, have a snack, play video games. They then do half of their homework/studying. Then they get some exercise (playing ball in the backyard, going for a jog). They eat dinner. Then they finish up their homework/studying.
That's a general schedule. But there are days when we have to fit in an activity of some kind and on those days they grab a snack and get their homework done. When they get back from the activity they finish up homework. |
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MS Son with severe ADHD and medication worn off by the end of the school day. After school he has 3.5 hours of gymnastics per day. He gets home around 8 then eats and does homework. I've found that this usy schedule that allows for a big break between school and homework and that is very active makes him far more focused. On days he doesn't practice, which is rare, he still tends to do homework after dinner.
Thing I have to watch out for are projects that take multiple days. I rely on teachers to let me know about these. |
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I have 3 kids. Rules?
1. Unload your backpack within 30 minutes of getting home. 2. Play outside or hang with friends for 1 hour a day. 3. Complete your homework everyday. 4. Be kind to others always. That's it. All are in advanced classes (AAP and all honors in HS). I basically give them the same rules that I give myself. |
But not the "no bragging" rule...? |
NP. What in the post above was bragging? The mention that the kids are advanced students? It didn't come across as bragging to me, firstly because it was stated in an understated and matter-of-fact way, and secondly because I would think it's pertinent information to evaluate the effectiveness of the approach. |
Your kids are in advanced classes and in upper grades and have time hang out with friends 1 hour of each day? When do they go to bed? |
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This is the PP quoted.
I wasn't bragging. I was making my point that even kids with a heavy workload need time to chill. Rules are a little bit too stringent, in general, which is why our rules are rather lax. My kids are involved in clubs and/or sports, but I think it's important to cultivate their friendships and get in the habit of doing such now. HS student usually is in bed, lights out by 11-11:30. Some nights by 10, but 11:00 is more usual. Younger ones are in bed, lights out by 9:30-10:00. Now, if their grades slip (we expect all As, a B is ok), then we will sit and ask what's going on. Is it the subject, is it lack of trying, lack of studying, etc. we don't get mad or upset, but we do talk about it. They really can do anything; anyone and everyone can, in fact. Hard work pays off. I treat them like mini adults. I don't need my boss micromanaging me, but if I make a mistake or don't perform in an outstanding manner, I'd like to talk about it. |
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Nights we have sports: School dismissed at 3:00, hang around until 3:30, go to library 3:45-4:45, pick them up, bring food.... go to sports 5:30 arrive home at 7:30-8, hang out until 8:30-9... homework from 9-10.
Nights we don't have sports: School dismissed at 3:00, go to library around 3:15-4:15, pick them up 4:30, get home at 5. Hang out, watch TV, play outside, whatever. Eat at 6:30, homework from 8-9. If they don't finish homework I wake them in the am to finish up or they do homework on the 30 minute commute to school. If they need more than 2 hours a night to complete homework I talk to the headmaster of the middle school to adjust. |