Engagement ring - money saving tips?

[Anonymous]

Hi all,

We are in our mid 30s and want to get engaged in the next few months. HHI is north of $225K, but we have some student loan debt and are saving for a house.

What tips do you recommend to smartly buy an engagement ring? Anything you'd do differently if doing it again? Should I buy the stone separately and then get it designed somewhere locally? We are in DC, but can travel within the region for the right jeweler or designer.

I'd say our max budget is $7.5K all-in. We are pretty open to style, materials, stone shape, etc. We want a diamond.


Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Buy it from craigslist from someone who is getting divorced. You can get it for a fraction of the price of new. I sold mine for $3000, and ex bought it for around $7k. Have it reset if you prefer. A stone is a stone.

Also, there is a place in Tyson's near the corner of International Drive and Rt. 7 called Jewelry exchange or something. Look there too.

[Anonymous]

Brilliant Earth has pretty designs and uses ethically sourced stones and metals.

[Anonymous]

I think you'd be able to get a pretty decent ring for $7K. My husband got mine from I. Gorman, and he said they were amazing and totally worked within his budget (we wanted to stay around $6K.) He wanted to find the ring 100% on his own, and all he knew was that I didn't want a diamond (just not a stone I'm into) and that I wanted it to be made by an American artist. 6 years later it's still the most amazing engagement ring I've ever seen! That's how you should feel about your engagement ring.

[Anonymous]

My advice is that it a waste of $$ altogether. Thank god we didn't buy a diamond solitaire but something else. Being happily married is prize enough for us. Good luck with your choice, but please tell us if you are not offended by the question, do you make any significant charitable donations? Just curious with 7,500 in the jewelry budget there.
PS, you might want to ask first how often women wear their engagement rings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Brilliant Earth has pretty designs and uses ethically sourced stones and metals.

IMHO they are overpriced by a lot. Beautiful designs, though.

I would spend the next few months on the Pricescope forums. They are experts at getting a beautiful diamond that is your style at the best cost. I would wait at least a month to get educated before actually buying. They also have a "preloved PS jewels" forum under the "Pricescope Cafe" forum, where people sell their jewelry. I have seen some great finds there. Often, the sellers are open to offers lower than the listed price. I have bought a couple of items there, and the sellers were very trustworthy.

Congratulations and best of luck on your search!

[Anonymous]

I wear mine daily, just under a karat from Charleston Alexander jewelers in VA. We paid about $3k and had a great experience with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My advice is that it a waste of $$ altogether. Thank god we didn't buy a diamond solitaire but something else. Being happily married is prize enough for us. Good luck with your choice, but please tell us if you are not offended by the question, do you make any significant charitable donations? Just curious with 7,500 in the jewelry budget there.
PS, you might want to ask first how often women wear their engagement rings.

Not OP, but this is not helpful and quite judgmental.

[Anonymous]

Are you really set on buying a diamond ring? Many people are okay not getting a diamond ring. There will be many people who will tell you that you are wasting your money, either by telling you that CZ is just as beautiful, or by mentioning any of the other common reasons such as De Beers' monopoly, artificial supply restriction, ecological impacts, exploitation, and etc.

If you have considered all of the various reasons and still want a diamond, then I offer the following:

At the price you are looking at, you should be able to find a 1ct round diamond that is eye clean with decent color and great cut. I recommend that you don't get hung up on the setting because it can dramatically increase the purchase price. My wife's engagement ring was a plain 4-prong platinum solitaire setting and it worked really well, accentuating the size of the diamond stone. Later on, on our 10-th anniversary, I upgraded her ring to a larger stone and felt comfortable with a more elaborate setting, but even then stayed fairly modest with "only" a $2k setting. A plain platinum solitaire setting should be about $600-$700. I do prefer the whiter platinum over white gold.

Now on the the stone, don't get cute, stay with tried and true round stone. I don't believe any local jewlers will be able to beat internet prices on a certified stone from GIA or AGS, which are perhaps the only two certification bodies that are wroth anything. EGL is a distant third and their stones are heavily discounted. If a stone is of good quality, it is worth it for the stone seller to get it certified by GIA or AGS, so if a stone does not have a cert from one of these two labs... it must not be all that great.

Pricescope.com is the google for diamonds. You can go on there and search for diamonds to your heart's content. When you are searching I recommend that you aim for a diamond with "ideal" or "excellent" cut. The color should be I or better, and clarity should be SI1 or better. Pricescope's default search options are actually a great match for your needs. You'll see that the search results return diamonds in the 5-6K range, and add a setting, there's your $7k ring.

You'll see something listed as "virtual inventory", this is where the same diamond is listed for sale by many different shops. Whoever sells it will have the diamond shipped to them first, mounted, and then the finished ring is shipped to you. You don't actually get to see the diamond or the ring until it arrives via FedEX. Both of my wife's rings were delivered this way and we were very happy with the results.

Some times, a shop will also have in-house inventory, some of the better online sellers will keep really good stones to themselves in this way. A couple of shops that have great reviews are Bluenile.com and Whiteflash.com. Both of my rings were purchased through Whiteflash.com - not out of any allegiance to the shop, just turned out that way. I would have been just as happy with Bluenile, I am sure, as well as any of the other shops that list their inventory through pricescope.com.

So the end summary is this: a diamond is something that you can buy completely sight unseen. The certificate describes every single notable characteristic about the diamond and there will not be any surprises. If a diamond has any issues, it will be noted. Most "ideal" or "excellent" diamonds will look stunning in person. Buying a diamond is not like picking a pumpkin. All of the shops will also offer a refund if you don't want to keep the ring. For example, Whiteflash offers a full refund guarantee - again just because I have experience with them, I am sure other shops also offer a similarly good return experience.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Get an infinity band. For wedding ring get a simple platinum or white gold band and it willl look beautiful together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My advice is that it a waste of $$ altogether. Thank god we didn't buy a diamond solitaire but something else. Being happily married is prize enough for us. Good luck with your choice, but please tell us if you are not offended by the question, do you make any significant charitable donations? Just curious with 7,500 in the jewelry budget there.
PS, you might want to ask first how often women wear their engagement rings.

The wife wears her engagement ring every time we go to an indoor party/gathering/event of some sort, this works out to about 2-3 times a month. But I'd say that even if she is not wearing it, knowing that it's there in the safe gives her some sense of satisfaction. She is very happy with it and I am happy that she's happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you really set on buying a diamond ring? Many people are okay not getting a diamond ring. There will be many people who will tell you that you are wasting your money, either by telling you that CZ is just as beautiful, or by mentioning any of the other common reasons such as De Beers' monopoly, artificial supply restriction, ecological impacts, exploitation, and etc.

If you have considered all of the various reasons and still want a diamond, then I offer the following:

At the price you are looking at, you should be able to find a 1ct round diamond that is eye clean with decent color and great cut. I recommend that you don't get hung up on the setting because it can dramatically increase the purchase price. My wife's engagement ring was a plain 4-prong platinum solitaire setting and it worked really well, accentuating the size of the diamond stone. Later on, on our 10-th anniversary, I upgraded her ring to a larger stone and felt comfortable with a more elaborate setting, but even then stayed fairly modest with "only" a $2k setting. A plain platinum solitaire setting should be about $600-$700. I do prefer the whiter platinum over white gold.

Now on the the stone, don't get cute, stay with tried and true round stone. I don't believe any local jewlers will be able to beat internet prices on a certified stone from GIA or AGS, which are perhaps the only two certification bodies that are wroth anything. EGL is a distant third and their stones are heavily discounted. If a stone is of good quality, it is worth it for the stone seller to get it certified by GIA or AGS, so if a stone does not have a cert from one of these two labs... it must not be all that great.

Pricescope.com is the google for diamonds. You can go on there and search for diamonds to your heart's content. When you are searching I recommend that you aim for a diamond with "ideal" or "excellent" cut. The color should be I or better, and clarity should be SI1 or better. Pricescope's default search options are actually a great match for your needs. You'll see that the search results return diamonds in the 5-6K range, and add a setting, there's your $7k ring.

You'll see something listed as "virtual inventory", this is where the same diamond is listed for sale by many different shops. Whoever sells it will have the diamond shipped to them first, mounted, and then the finished ring is shipped to you. You don't actually get to see the diamond or the ring until it arrives via FedEX. Both of my wife's rings were delivered this way and we were very happy with the results.

Some times, a shop will also have in-house inventory, some of the better online sellers will keep really good stones to themselves in this way. A couple of shops that have great reviews are Bluenile.com and Whiteflash.com. Both of my rings were purchased through Whiteflash.com - not out of any allegiance to the shop, just turned out that way. I would have been just as happy with Bluenile, I am sure, as well as any of the other shops that list their inventory through pricescope.com.

So the end summary is this: a diamond is something that you can buy completely sight unseen. The certificate describes every single notable characteristic about the diamond and there will not be any surprises. If a diamond has any issues, it will be noted. Most "ideal" or "excellent" diamonds will look stunning in person. Buying a diamond is not like picking a pumpkin. All of the shops will also offer a refund if you don't want to keep the ring. For example, Whiteflash offers a full refund guarantee - again just because I have experience with them, I am sure other shops also offer a similarly good return experience.

Good luck!

Personally I like the princess cut or emerald cut. I don't think of them as "cute". I think they are very classic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you really set on buying a diamond ring? Many people are okay not getting a diamond ring. There will be many people who will tell you that you are wasting your money, either by telling you that CZ is just as beautiful, or by mentioning any of the other common reasons such as De Beers' monopoly, artificial supply restriction, ecological impacts, exploitation, and etc.

If you have considered all of the various reasons and still want a diamond, then I offer the following:

At the price you are looking at, you should be able to find a 1ct round diamond that is eye clean with decent color and great cut. I recommend that you don't get hung up on the setting because it can dramatically increase the purchase price. My wife's engagement ring was a plain 4-prong platinum solitaire setting and it worked really well, accentuating the size of the diamond stone. Later on, on our 10-th anniversary, I upgraded her ring to a larger stone and felt comfortable with a more elaborate setting, but even then stayed fairly modest with "only" a $2k setting. A plain platinum solitaire setting should be about $600-$700. I do prefer the whiter platinum over white gold.

Now on the the stone, don't get cute, stay with tried and true round stone. I don't believe any local jewlers will be able to beat internet prices on a certified stone from GIA or AGS, which are perhaps the only two certification bodies that are wroth anything. EGL is a distant third and their stones are heavily discounted. If a stone is of good quality, it is worth it for the stone seller to get it certified by GIA or AGS, so if a stone does not have a cert from one of these two labs... it must not be all that great.

Pricescope.com is the google for diamonds. You can go on there and search for diamonds to your heart's content. When you are searching I recommend that you aim for a diamond with "ideal" or "excellent" cut. The color should be I or better, and clarity should be SI1 or better. Pricescope's default search options are actually a great match for your needs. You'll see that the search results return diamonds in the 5-6K range, and add a setting, there's your $7k ring.

You'll see something listed as "virtual inventory", this is where the same diamond is listed for sale by many different shops. Whoever sells it will have the diamond shipped to them first, mounted, and then the finished ring is shipped to you. You don't actually get to see the diamond or the ring until it arrives via FedEX. Both of my wife's rings were delivered this way and we were very happy with the results.

Some times, a shop will also have in-house inventory, some of the better online sellers will keep really good stones to themselves in this way. A couple of shops that have great reviews are Bluenile.com and Whiteflash.com. Both of my rings were purchased through Whiteflash.com - not out of any allegiance to the shop, just turned out that way. I would have been just as happy with Bluenile, I am sure, as well as any of the other shops that list their inventory through pricescope.com.

So the end summary is this: a diamond is something that you can buy completely sight unseen. The certificate describes every single notable characteristic about the diamond and there will not be any surprises. If a diamond has any issues, it will be noted. Most "ideal" or "excellent" diamonds will look stunning in person. Buying a diamond is not like picking a pumpkin. All of the shops will also offer a refund if you don't want to keep the ring. For example, Whiteflash offers a full refund guarantee - again just because I have experience with them, I am sure other shops also offer a similarly good return experience.

Good luck!

OP here: thank you, this is fantastic. We definitely have time, so I'll get on Pricescope and do a bunch of research. This is definitely one of those things that I will "nerd-out" on and get into every nitty gritty detail.
Also, my GF is a total bargain hound - she probably refuse a ring if I paid full retail price for something overpriced at Tiny Jewel Box on CT Avenue

Does anyone have experience with vintage rings? Some of the art deco style rings from the 1930s are fantastic and she would love a unique piece that connotes history.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My advice is that it a waste of $$ altogether. Thank god we didn't buy a diamond solitaire but something else. Being happily married is prize enough for us. Good luck with your choice, but please tell us if you are not offended by the question, do you make any significant charitable donations? Just curious with 7,500 in the jewelry budget there.
PS, you might want to ask first how often women wear their engagement rings.

The wife wears her engagement ring every time we go to an indoor party/gathering/event of some sort, this works out to about 2-3 times a month. But I'd say that even if she is not wearing it, knowing that it's there in the safe gives her some sense of satisfaction. She is very happy with it and I am happy that she's happy.

OP here: I'm sure that this is what will happen with my GF/to-be-DW. She's happy = I'm happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Personally I like the princess cut or emerald cut. I don't think of them as "cute". I think they are very classic.

PP here. People should get whatever appeals to their personal sense of style, I agree. Someone who has no particular preference, however, should know that princess and emerald cuts are typically not as brilliant and are therefore not as popular. It's tougher to find princess cut diamonds with good brilliance and emerald cut is just not as brilliant because of the fewer facets. For someone's first diamond ring, focusing on round diamonds would give them better access to a pool of excellent diamonds, rather than having to also navigate the particular issues associated with princess and emerald cut diamonds.